1
00:00:04,086 --> 00:00:05,923
[birds chirping]
2
00:00:12,596 --> 00:00:14,890
[alarm buzzing]
3
00:00:14,973 --> 00:00:17,976
[rock music playing]
4
00:00:28,695 --> 00:00:30,906
[song continues]
5
00:00:39,998 --> 00:00:41,166
Whoo!
6
00:00:49,675 --> 00:00:51,301
Fuck!
7
00:00:54,429 --> 00:00:56,849
-Siri, call Shithead.
-[phone beeps]
8
00:00:58,475 --> 00:01:00,435
-[phone rings]
-Oh!
9
00:01:02,896 --> 00:01:03,897
[with mouth full] Good morning.
10
00:01:03,981 --> 00:01:06,859
[Rebecca] There is nothing in The Sun
about Ted and Keeley.
11
00:01:06,942 --> 00:01:08,861
Nothing. Are you in your office?
12
00:01:08,944 --> 00:01:10,153
Of course I am.
13
00:01:10,237 --> 00:01:11,238
Then get up here now.
14
00:01:11,822 --> 00:01:12,990
[sighs]
15
00:01:13,448 --> 00:01:15,367
Bye, boys. Tell Mum I love her.
16
00:01:16,285 --> 00:01:18,203
Knock, knock.
Hey, boss, I don't know about you,
17
00:01:18,287 --> 00:01:20,747
but I had an absolute peach of a Sunday.
18
00:01:20,831 --> 00:01:22,749
-Here you go. [chuckles]
-[sniffs]
19
00:01:23,709 --> 00:01:25,252
Yeah, finally saw Big Ben.
20
00:01:25,335 --> 00:01:27,588
Boy, I thought
I'd seen the biggest clock there was.
21
00:01:27,671 --> 00:01:29,423
When I was a kid, my folks took me
22
00:01:29,506 --> 00:01:32,009
to the Allen-Bradley Clock Tower
up there in Milwaukee.
23
00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:33,760
They ended up leaving me there
all by myself.
24
00:01:33,844 --> 00:01:36,763
Yeah, three hours and 42 minutes.
You know how I know that?
25
00:01:36,847 --> 00:01:38,140
You were staring at a clock?
26
00:01:38,223 --> 00:01:40,517
I was staring at a clock.
That's exactly right. Yeah, bingo.
27
00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:41,810
That's a little bit of a mystery puzzle.
28
00:01:41,894 --> 00:01:43,395
You figured it out right away.
You're a sharp cookie.
29
00:01:43,478 --> 00:01:44,479
-Ted.
-Yeah.
30
00:01:44,563 --> 00:01:46,899
Speaking as we were mere moments ago,
about time,
31
00:01:46,982 --> 00:01:48,692
I unfortunately don't have any.
32
00:01:48,775 --> 00:01:50,569
I have a branding meeting, so...
33
00:01:50,652 --> 00:01:52,529
Oh. I always feel so bad for the cows,
34
00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:54,781
but you gotta do it
otherwise they get lost.
35
00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:00,120
That was a branding joke.
36
00:02:00,204 --> 00:02:01,496
If we were in Kansas right now,
37
00:02:01,580 --> 00:02:04,249
I'd just be sitting here waiting for you
to finish laughing. Yeah.
38
00:02:05,292 --> 00:02:06,502
I'll see ya tomorrow, okay?
39
00:02:06,585 --> 00:02:09,463
-Okay. Counting the minutes.
-Yeah, there you are.
40
00:02:09,922 --> 00:02:12,174
[theme music plays]
41
00:02:30,901 --> 00:02:34,404
All right. Let's see what we got here.
I've got this fella up here, the goalie.
42
00:02:34,488 --> 00:02:36,657
Then all these guys over here, okay?
43
00:02:36,740 --> 00:02:39,409
And going over here, going over that way.
44
00:02:40,327 --> 00:02:42,079
This son of a gun's gonna go
all the way down here.
45
00:02:45,207 --> 00:02:47,626
Crystal Palace
kicked our booties last week.
46
00:02:48,252 --> 00:02:50,712
And this here, is our current offense
that we are running,
47
00:02:50,796 --> 00:02:52,881
and I think it stinks!
48
00:02:52,965 --> 00:02:53,966
[blows raspberry]
49
00:02:54,049 --> 00:02:55,342
[grunts] Get rid of it.
50
00:02:57,594 --> 00:03:01,640
Now, you might be wondering why'd I draw
all that up there just to erase it.
51
00:03:01,723 --> 00:03:03,851
And that is because
I believe in symbolic gestures.
52
00:03:04,560 --> 00:03:06,436
-[yawning] As do I.
-Whoa!
53
00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:08,105
What time did you get home last night?
54
00:03:08,772 --> 00:03:10,566
-Didn't.
-Really? Oh.
55
00:03:10,649 --> 00:03:11,650
Nah.
56
00:03:11,733 --> 00:03:14,069
[Ted] Now, look, our whole offense
right now is all give-and-go.
57
00:03:14,152 --> 00:03:16,655
Give the ball to Jamie
and everyone else can go to hell.
58
00:03:16,738 --> 00:03:19,575
So, I am officially on the prowl
for any new ideas, you hear?
59
00:03:19,658 --> 00:03:20,659
Oh.
60
00:03:22,286 --> 00:03:23,620
-You got something, Nate?
-Uh, no.
61
00:03:24,079 --> 00:03:25,998
Uh, so... [stammers]
62
00:03:26,081 --> 00:03:28,333
No. No. God, no. Never mind, I'm sorry.
63
00:03:28,417 --> 00:03:30,919
Come on now. You're one of us.
Let's go. Fire away. What do you got?
64
00:03:31,003 --> 00:03:33,714
Okay, right.
Well, it's just, um... No, other pocket.
65
00:03:33,797 --> 00:03:35,591
It's just something that I thought of.
66
00:03:35,674 --> 00:03:36,675
Um...
67
00:03:37,426 --> 00:03:39,136
Sorry. Jesus.
68
00:03:39,803 --> 00:03:41,054
Not that one.
69
00:03:41,138 --> 00:03:43,265
You know what, it's not even very good.
70
00:03:43,348 --> 00:03:45,392
It's probably really bad.
It's embarrassing even.
71
00:03:45,475 --> 00:03:46,476
-I just--
-Sorry, Nate.
72
00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:49,396
I have a real tricky time hearing
folks that don't believe in themselves.
73
00:03:49,479 --> 00:03:50,731
I'm gonna ask you real quick again.
74
00:03:50,814 --> 00:03:52,941
-Do you think this idea will work?
-Yeah, I do.
75
00:03:53,025 --> 00:03:53,859
Whoa!
76
00:03:53,942 --> 00:03:56,028
-Why you screaming at us, Nate?
-Oh, God!
77
00:03:56,111 --> 00:03:57,696
We're right here.
78
00:03:58,155 --> 00:03:59,990
All right, come on now.
Walk us through it.
79
00:04:00,782 --> 00:04:03,202
Okay. So, I thought if we started
the attack on the wing,
80
00:04:03,285 --> 00:04:04,620
Jamie could run through nearside,
81
00:04:04,703 --> 00:04:07,414
then when the defense follows,
Sam could fill his spot.
82
00:04:07,497 --> 00:04:09,249
So, use Jamie as a decoy?
83
00:04:09,333 --> 00:04:10,584
No. [chuckles]
84
00:04:11,126 --> 00:04:14,171
No. Well, yeah, in--
Yeah, in this case, yes.
85
00:04:15,047 --> 00:04:16,339
Let's give it a shot.
86
00:04:18,175 --> 00:04:19,343
What, you're gonna use my play?
87
00:04:19,426 --> 00:04:21,637
Yeah. I mean,
we're gonna try it on, see if it fits.
88
00:04:21,720 --> 00:04:23,055
You know, it might not.
89
00:04:23,138 --> 00:04:25,933
Then again,
it might be a very flattering silhouette,
90
00:04:26,016 --> 00:04:27,809
and I might wear it right outta the store.
91
00:04:27,893 --> 00:04:29,645
Makes me feel good and I start to strut.
92
00:04:30,354 --> 00:04:32,898
I'm like, "Ooh, I like this.
I like the way this makes me feel."
93
00:04:32,981 --> 00:04:34,274
Show him your strut, Coach.
94
00:04:34,358 --> 00:04:37,194
Yeah, there you go. Oh, yeah.
Yep, that's how to strut.
95
00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:38,820
Let me see you strut, Nate. Come on.
96
00:04:40,197 --> 00:04:42,074
There you go, Nate.
Yeah, that's one way to do it.
97
00:04:42,157 --> 00:04:43,283
There you go.
98
00:04:44,076 --> 00:04:45,619
You look a little angry,
but that's all right.
99
00:04:45,702 --> 00:04:47,371
That's my fault.
I forgot the pitch is right this way.
100
00:04:47,454 --> 00:04:48,872
Come on, let's go.
Strut this way. Here we go.
101
00:04:48,956 --> 00:04:50,123
Still strutting.
102
00:04:50,207 --> 00:04:52,000
-I'll see you later. Yeah.
-Yeah.
103
00:04:54,127 --> 00:04:56,505
Ted! Hey, um, have you got a minute?
104
00:04:56,588 --> 00:04:59,675
-Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everything okay?
-Yeah, yeah. No, it's fine, yeah.
105
00:05:02,261 --> 00:05:04,847
-It's not fine. Everything's shit.
-Oh, no.
106
00:05:04,930 --> 00:05:07,307
This was gonna be
the front page of The Sun today.
107
00:05:07,391 --> 00:05:09,309
"Manager Shags Star Player's Girlfriend."
108
00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:11,770
I think a more accurate headline would be,
109
00:05:11,854 --> 00:05:15,566
"Manager Innocently Feeds Young Woman
Whose Relationship Does Not Define Her."
110
00:05:15,649 --> 00:05:17,150
Ted, this is really bad!
111
00:05:17,234 --> 00:05:20,320
Except I look insanely fit
in this picture.
112
00:05:21,405 --> 00:05:23,073
Yeah, no, it's beautiful light.
113
00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:25,742
My friend who works at the paper said
he can hold this story for one day
114
00:05:25,826 --> 00:05:27,202
-as a favor.
-Mm-hmm.
115
00:05:27,286 --> 00:05:30,539
When this shit hits,
Jamie is going to go mental.
116
00:05:30,622 --> 00:05:32,082
There's going to be photographers
all over us.
117
00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:33,000
Right, right.
118
00:05:33,083 --> 00:05:34,960
The next picture of me
will not be this perfect.
119
00:05:35,043 --> 00:05:37,921
I am gonna be mid-sneeze face, like--
[gasp]
120
00:05:39,590 --> 00:05:40,799
[exhales]
121
00:05:40,883 --> 00:05:42,718
-Guess what the headline will be.
-Gesundheit?
122
00:05:42,801 --> 00:05:45,012
"Jamie's Tart Breaks Tartt's Heart."
123
00:05:45,762 --> 00:05:47,431
-Did you just come up with that?
-Yeah.
124
00:05:47,514 --> 00:05:49,641
-Everyone would read that.
-Of course they would.
125
00:05:49,725 --> 00:05:52,019
You have no idea the power of rhyming
in this goddamn country.
126
00:05:52,102 --> 00:05:53,145
Yeah.
127
00:05:53,228 --> 00:05:55,856
Oh, "Lasso Makes Passo
and Creates Team Fiasco."
128
00:05:56,315 --> 00:05:57,941
Whoa. Keeley's got bars.
129
00:05:58,025 --> 00:06:01,028
Yeah, I'm cute as a button
and I can rhyme my ass off.
130
00:06:01,987 --> 00:06:03,906
God, it's no wonder
they want to destroy me.
131
00:06:04,781 --> 00:06:05,908
Yeah, yeah.
132
00:06:08,619 --> 00:06:10,037
[stammers]
133
00:06:12,581 --> 00:06:14,458
Sorry, it took me so long
to get up the stairs.
134
00:06:14,541 --> 00:06:18,545
I was... stopped to talk
by about a hundred people.
135
00:06:18,629 --> 00:06:19,963
Still nothing.
136
00:06:20,047 --> 00:06:22,090
Get someone to run
the story about Ted and Keeley.
137
00:06:22,174 --> 00:06:23,175
[knocking]
138
00:06:23,258 --> 00:06:26,678
-Hey, boss.
-Ted! And Keeley. Hello.
139
00:06:26,762 --> 00:06:29,014
Hey, I found that in the hall. Yeah.
140
00:06:29,097 --> 00:06:31,099
So, we got ourselves a situation here.
141
00:06:31,183 --> 00:06:32,726
Go ahead, show her the picture, yeah.
142
00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:36,396
See? And the fucking Sun
is running it tomorrow.
143
00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:37,689
Honestly, these people,
144
00:06:37,773 --> 00:06:40,651
they just have no regard
for people's privacy and dignity.
145
00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:44,321
Yeah, I'm gonna find the piece of shit
that took this and who hired them.
146
00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:45,906
No, no. Not necessary.
147
00:06:45,989 --> 00:06:49,368
I know the owner of the paper.
I can get this stopped with a phone call.
148
00:06:50,494 --> 00:06:52,913
Really? Oh, my God. Thank you.
149
00:06:52,996 --> 00:06:54,248
See, what I tell ya, huh?
150
00:06:54,331 --> 00:06:57,209
This woman right here is strong,
confident and powerful.
151
00:06:57,292 --> 00:07:00,212
Boss, I tell ya, I'd hate to see you
and Michelle Obama arm wrestle,
152
00:07:00,295 --> 00:07:02,256
but I wouldn't be able to
take my eyes off it either.
153
00:07:02,339 --> 00:07:04,091
Oh. That's not a compliment
I've had before.
154
00:07:04,758 --> 00:07:08,011
-You do have perfect action figure-y arms.
-Yeah.
155
00:07:08,470 --> 00:07:11,139
There's another one. Anyway, glad to help.
156
00:07:11,223 --> 00:07:13,100
-All right. Yeah.
-Thank you.
157
00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:15,352
-Okay.
-[Ted] See y'all later.
158
00:07:16,019 --> 00:07:17,020
[door closes]
159
00:07:17,104 --> 00:07:19,064
There's no way she can
trace that photo back to me, can she?
160
00:07:19,565 --> 00:07:21,400
-[winces] Yes.
-What do you mean "yes"?
161
00:07:22,192 --> 00:07:24,194
Did you not use an alias
or a burner phone?
162
00:07:24,278 --> 00:07:29,575
I'm not a spy, Rebecca. I'm just
the director of football operations.
163
00:07:29,658 --> 00:07:31,743
And equally proficient at both.
164
00:07:31,827 --> 00:07:34,538
Well, thank you. Wait...
165
00:07:35,998 --> 00:07:38,709
Okay, here we go. Sam lays it for Dickson.
166
00:07:38,792 --> 00:07:39,668
Okay, nice touch.
167
00:07:42,087 --> 00:07:43,881
[Coach Beard] Switch to Bumbercatch.
168
00:07:44,339 --> 00:07:46,550
Jamie decoys through.
169
00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:48,760
-Sam wide open.
-[Ted] There it is!
170
00:07:48,844 --> 00:07:51,096
[players cheering]
171
00:07:51,180 --> 00:07:52,931
Whoo!
172
00:07:56,435 --> 00:07:58,187
Nice play, Nate. How you feel?
173
00:07:58,270 --> 00:08:01,523
I just don't know.
So many new feelings. Yeah.
174
00:08:01,607 --> 00:08:03,025
Kinda like getting your first pube, right?
175
00:08:03,108 --> 00:08:04,484
-Yeah. What?
-Here we go. [blows whistle]
176
00:08:04,568 --> 00:08:06,945
All right. Hey. Nice work.
177
00:08:07,029 --> 00:08:08,030
Okay, now, gentlemen,
178
00:08:08,113 --> 00:08:09,615
here's the other thing
we're gonna start focusing on.
179
00:08:09,698 --> 00:08:11,909
Making quicker transitions
from offense to defense.
180
00:08:11,992 --> 00:08:15,120
Y'all gotta start making your hellos
goodbyes. You understand?
181
00:08:15,204 --> 00:08:17,247
Easiest way to get that done well
is to do it well.
182
00:08:17,331 --> 00:08:20,083
But aside from that,
you gotta be in great shape, right?
183
00:08:20,167 --> 00:08:23,128
So, we are all gonna run two laps
around this field.
184
00:08:23,212 --> 00:08:26,548
Anyone who loses to me
has to run four more. Let's go!
185
00:08:27,132 --> 00:08:30,052
-Okay, come on. What you got?
-[player] What's going on?
186
00:08:30,135 --> 00:08:31,970
[players shouting]
187
00:08:32,054 --> 00:08:34,056
[chuckles]
188
00:08:34,139 --> 00:08:36,058
[Ted] You're catching up.
Don't cut that corner!
189
00:08:36,140 --> 00:08:38,101
Come on. You can't catch me,
I'm the gingerbread man.
190
00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:39,520
[Jamie] Faster, boys!
191
00:08:41,730 --> 00:08:43,565
-Look at his face.
-Colin, Isaac, please stop.
192
00:08:43,982 --> 00:08:45,651
Yeah, it really hurts now.
It really hurts.
193
00:08:45,734 --> 00:08:47,945
Be careful, Colin, now.
That's our new coach.
194
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:49,696
-[Colin] Oh, right, boyo.
-[Isaac] Yeah.
195
00:08:49,780 --> 00:08:50,948
Sorry, gaffer.
196
00:08:52,074 --> 00:08:53,534
-Thank you.
-[laughs]
197
00:08:54,201 --> 00:08:56,828
-[chattering]
-[Ted] Whoo!
198
00:08:56,912 --> 00:08:59,248
Okay, way to run out there today, fellas.
199
00:08:59,331 --> 00:09:01,208
You guys are much faster than me.
200
00:09:01,291 --> 00:09:02,876
-[camera clicks]
-Except Coach Beard.
201
00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:05,170
What's going on? I thought you ran track
in high school or something.
202
00:09:05,254 --> 00:09:06,255
-Chess team, Coach.
-Mm-hmm.
203
00:09:06,338 --> 00:09:07,506
Illinois State Champs, baby.
204
00:09:07,589 --> 00:09:09,383
Okay, yeah. Illinois is a state, fellas.
205
00:09:09,466 --> 00:09:12,302
Uh, one last thing, there are some gifts
up in y'all's lockers.
206
00:09:12,386 --> 00:09:14,805
In your little cubbies up there.
So, hope you enjoy 'em.
207
00:09:28,569 --> 00:09:29,903
It's a fucking book.
208
00:09:40,581 --> 00:09:41,707
Nice one, bitch boy.
209
00:09:46,253 --> 00:09:47,379
[knocking]
210
00:09:48,338 --> 00:09:50,257
-Hey.
-Yeah, I just thought you should know
211
00:09:50,340 --> 00:09:52,926
that your boy Nathan's being harassed
every single day
212
00:09:53,010 --> 00:09:56,013
by Jamie and his little... side-pricks.
213
00:09:56,722 --> 00:09:58,348
-Right.
-So you know already?
214
00:09:58,432 --> 00:09:59,474
Yep.
215
00:09:59,558 --> 00:10:01,143
So, you'll take care of it?
216
00:10:01,226 --> 00:10:02,311
No.
217
00:10:03,687 --> 00:10:04,771
What the fuck?
218
00:10:04,855 --> 00:10:07,816
Roy, I learned two pretty big lessons
219
00:10:07,900 --> 00:10:10,819
on the rough-and-tumble playgrounds
of Brookridge Elementary School.
220
00:10:11,486 --> 00:10:14,489
One, if little Ronnie Fowch
offers you a candy bar,
221
00:10:14,573 --> 00:10:17,075
you immediately say no,
and you get the hell outta there.
222
00:10:17,659 --> 00:10:18,911
'Cause there's a good chance
223
00:10:18,994 --> 00:10:22,122
that little son of a gun has just pooped
inside of a Butterfinger wrapper.
224
00:10:22,831 --> 00:10:25,209
No one ever saw him do it,
but a couple people ate it.
225
00:10:25,292 --> 00:10:28,420
Number two, if the teacher tells the bully
not to pick on someone,
226
00:10:28,504 --> 00:10:29,838
it's just gonna make it worse.
227
00:10:29,922 --> 00:10:31,381
So, you're not gonna do anything?
228
00:10:32,216 --> 00:10:33,342
No.
229
00:10:33,425 --> 00:10:34,426
[scoffs]
230
00:10:39,223 --> 00:10:40,432
Why you winding him up?
231
00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:42,184
He's the one, Coach.
232
00:10:42,267 --> 00:10:44,311
If we're gonna make an impact here,
233
00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:47,648
the first domino that needs to fall
is right inside that man's heart.
234
00:10:57,616 --> 00:10:58,617
Yes.
235
00:11:00,035 --> 00:11:03,747
-Jamie, can I ask you something?
-It's 40 kilos. I do three sets of ten.
236
00:11:04,331 --> 00:11:08,794
And then I alternate between bis...
[grunts] and tris.
237
00:11:08,877 --> 00:11:11,463
I don't give a shit what you lift,
you little pretty boy.
238
00:11:11,547 --> 00:11:13,215
Yeah, you do, 'cause you asked.
239
00:11:14,216 --> 00:11:15,551
Can you curl 40 kilos?
240
00:11:15,634 --> 00:11:17,511
No, but I can use your balls
as a speed bag.
241
00:11:17,594 --> 00:11:19,721
-Do you wanna try that?
-Not especially.
242
00:11:20,430 --> 00:11:22,558
Do you even understand
the influence you have on this team?
243
00:11:22,641 --> 00:11:24,476
-I'm the shit, yeah.
-No, you're a bellend.
244
00:11:24,560 --> 00:11:28,063
But because your right foot
was kissed by God the boys look up to you.
245
00:11:28,146 --> 00:11:29,690
It's made me question my own faith.
246
00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:31,483
So, when they pick on Nate...
247
00:11:31,567 --> 00:11:33,068
[chuckles]
248
00:11:33,151 --> 00:11:34,278
...and you laugh...
249
00:11:34,820 --> 00:11:35,821
Yeah.
250
00:11:35,904 --> 00:11:37,447
...they think it's okay.
251
00:11:37,531 --> 00:11:41,285
Right, 'cause Nate's a weak baby
and he can't do anything about it.
252
00:11:41,702 --> 00:11:43,370
[chuckling]
253
00:11:46,248 --> 00:11:48,750
Yeah, all right. I'll take care of it.
Nate's a good lad.
254
00:11:49,168 --> 00:11:50,252
Good.
255
00:11:51,670 --> 00:11:52,921
Hey, Roy. You comin' to the club tonight?
256
00:11:53,005 --> 00:11:54,214
Hold on, will you be there?
257
00:11:54,298 --> 00:11:56,383
-Of course, bruv.
-Then fuck no.
258
00:11:57,926 --> 00:11:59,511
Colin, Isaac, come here.
259
00:12:01,054 --> 00:12:02,848
You know how you two are
always messing with Nate?
260
00:12:02,931 --> 00:12:04,099
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
261
00:12:07,769 --> 00:12:09,271
Keep it up. Makes me laugh.
262
00:12:16,195 --> 00:12:17,196
[clears throat]
263
00:12:17,279 --> 00:12:19,364
-Good morning, Higgins.
-Oh, good morning. I was just--
264
00:12:19,448 --> 00:12:21,909
Waiting at the entrance
so I'd see you were here on time.
265
00:12:21,992 --> 00:12:24,244
Exactly. You seem in good spirits.
266
00:12:24,328 --> 00:12:26,914
Yes, I am. I've just realized something.
267
00:12:26,997 --> 00:12:28,916
Who cares if we can't run that picture?
268
00:12:28,999 --> 00:12:30,876
The bigger issue
is that the local community
269
00:12:30,959 --> 00:12:33,420
is getting behind the team
no matter how badly they play.
270
00:12:33,504 --> 00:12:34,463
Mm.
271
00:12:34,546 --> 00:12:36,381
It is an outstanding fan base.
272
00:12:36,465 --> 00:12:39,009
Yes, one I believe I can put an end to.
273
00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:40,802
Hooray. [chuckles]
274
00:12:40,886 --> 00:12:42,095
[Rebecca] No.
275
00:12:42,179 --> 00:12:44,139
Okay. I'll go back there.
276
00:12:44,223 --> 00:12:46,266
-[Ted] Here you go.
-[Rebecca] Thank you.
277
00:12:46,350 --> 00:12:48,560
So, I spoke to the owner of The Sun.
278
00:12:48,644 --> 00:12:49,853
You spoke to God?
279
00:12:50,479 --> 00:12:51,855
-No, the newspaper.
-Oh, right.
280
00:12:51,939 --> 00:12:55,526
And he has agreed to
not run the photo of you and Keeley.
281
00:12:56,151 --> 00:13:00,155
-MVP! MVP! MVP!
-[chuckles]
282
00:13:00,239 --> 00:13:02,407
-Left leg! Whoo! Right leg, not as good!
-Okay.
283
00:13:02,491 --> 00:13:04,076
-Yeah!
-Yes. Okay, thank you, Ted.
284
00:13:04,159 --> 00:13:05,827
Sorry. Yeah, no.
You were saying. Go ahead.
285
00:13:05,911 --> 00:13:06,912
In exchange,
286
00:13:06,995 --> 00:13:10,374
I've agreed for his
more reputable newspaper, The Independent,
287
00:13:10,457 --> 00:13:11,959
to do a profile on you.
288
00:13:12,042 --> 00:13:13,335
"One-on-One with Coach Lasso."
289
00:13:13,418 --> 00:13:14,503
Yeah, okay.
290
00:13:14,586 --> 00:13:17,130
-The writer will be Trent Crimm.
-Hmm.
291
00:13:17,214 --> 00:13:20,217
And he's very good,
and the supporters really listen to him.
292
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:22,678
Oh, no. I know Trent, yeah.
He's a tough cookie.
293
00:13:22,761 --> 00:13:24,972
-Really?
-Yeah, but that's okay.
294
00:13:25,055 --> 00:13:26,557
You know what you do
with tough cookies, don't ya?
295
00:13:26,640 --> 00:13:29,017
-No.
-Dip 'em in milk. [chuckles]
296
00:13:29,101 --> 00:13:30,310
[chuckles]
297
00:13:30,394 --> 00:13:32,104
[Ted] All right, let's run that new one.
298
00:13:32,187 --> 00:13:33,897
[players chattering]
299
00:13:36,483 --> 00:13:37,818
Hey, there he is.
300
00:13:37,901 --> 00:13:39,862
Hello, Coach Ted Lasso from America.
301
00:13:39,945 --> 00:13:42,281
Hello, Trent Crimm from The Independent.
302
00:13:42,364 --> 00:13:44,324
Hey, excited to spend the day with ya.
Gonna be fun.
303
00:13:44,408 --> 00:13:45,784
And please, call me Ted.
304
00:13:46,785 --> 00:13:48,036
All right, let's go!
305
00:13:48,704 --> 00:13:50,873
[players shouting]
306
00:13:53,876 --> 00:13:54,960
[Ted] Wide open.
307
00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:56,879
-[player] Yeah!
-[Ted] Ooh! Snuck it by him.
308
00:13:59,631 --> 00:14:01,842
-[players cheering]
-[blows whistle]
309
00:14:03,468 --> 00:14:04,970
Thataway, Sammy. How'd that feel?
310
00:14:05,053 --> 00:14:07,681
Oh, wonderful, Coach.
I felt that one in my penis.
311
00:14:07,764 --> 00:14:09,641
Yeah. No, that sounds about right.
That's good. Yeah.
312
00:14:09,725 --> 00:14:12,227
Hey, Jamie, you gotta sell
that run-through hard, baby.
313
00:14:12,311 --> 00:14:13,979
Make the defense believe you.
Watch, like this.
314
00:14:14,062 --> 00:14:15,606
Ball! Ball! Give me the ball!
315
00:14:15,689 --> 00:14:18,525
I want the ball! Give me the ball!
I would like the ball, please!
316
00:14:18,609 --> 00:14:19,610
Make it a performance.
317
00:14:19,693 --> 00:14:21,945
I want you winning an Oscar
at the ESPYs next year.
318
00:14:22,029 --> 00:14:23,363
You want me to run decoy?
319
00:14:23,447 --> 00:14:24,406
Yeah, that's right.
320
00:14:24,489 --> 00:14:25,449
It's a joke.
321
00:14:25,949 --> 00:14:28,452
Unfortunately for you, though,
no one thinks it's funny.
322
00:14:28,535 --> 00:14:29,536
That true?
323
00:14:29,620 --> 00:14:32,164
Um, agree to disagree.
I find it hilarious.
324
00:14:32,247 --> 00:14:33,540
I thought it was
funnier than Step Brothers.
325
00:14:33,624 --> 00:14:34,499
Ooh. High praise.
326
00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:36,793
That scene where the bunk bed collapses...
327
00:14:37,211 --> 00:14:39,463
I used to think
that was the funniest thing I'd ever seen,
328
00:14:39,546 --> 00:14:40,547
but then I just saw that.
329
00:14:40,631 --> 00:14:42,633
And now I'm gonna have to
rethink my order of what I think is
330
00:14:42,716 --> 00:14:43,842
the funniest thing I've ever seen.
331
00:14:43,926 --> 00:14:47,221
Yeah, that's when sports and art combine,
as far as I'm concerned.
332
00:14:47,304 --> 00:14:49,097
All right, fellas,
let's run it again. Let's go.
333
00:14:49,181 --> 00:14:50,182
Cheers.
334
00:14:51,475 --> 00:14:53,185
Yeah, they're getting it.
They're getting it.
335
00:14:53,268 --> 00:14:55,395
Interesting play, Ted.
Did you come up with this?
336
00:14:55,479 --> 00:14:56,480
Oh, no, no, no.
337
00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:58,732
This is all cooked up
by our very own Nate the Great.
338
00:14:59,358 --> 00:15:00,484
Who's "Nate the Great"?
339
00:15:01,443 --> 00:15:02,444
Oh, yeah. There he is.
340
00:15:03,153 --> 00:15:05,781
Someone's been walking their dog here.
Found another poo.
341
00:15:06,323 --> 00:15:07,324
Okay.
342
00:15:08,116 --> 00:15:09,993
What exactly does "Nate the Great" do?
343
00:15:10,494 --> 00:15:11,912
I'm not exactly sure what his title is.
344
00:15:11,995 --> 00:15:13,580
Hey, Coach.
What is Nate's job around here?
345
00:15:13,664 --> 00:15:15,415
-Kit man.
-There you go. Kit man.
346
00:15:16,542 --> 00:15:19,461
Do you mean to tell me you're
entrusting a Premier League team's attack
347
00:15:19,545 --> 00:15:20,504
to the kit man?
348
00:15:20,587 --> 00:15:23,131
That young fellow's forgotten more
about this sport than I'll ever know.
349
00:15:23,215 --> 00:15:25,342
[chuckles] Heck, might be a genius.
350
00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:26,677
Anything to add, Coach?
351
00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:27,761
Good kid.
352
00:15:29,346 --> 00:15:30,347
Boy, oh boy.
353
00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:32,224
If you knew Coach Beard,
you'd know what a big deal that was.
354
00:15:32,307 --> 00:15:34,560
You mean that, don't you? Whoa.
355
00:15:35,060 --> 00:15:36,562
Well, hell.
There's your story right there.
356
00:15:36,645 --> 00:15:39,648
Got a headline and everything.
"Man Nods Head."
357
00:15:39,731 --> 00:15:40,858
Watch your back, Gay Talese.
358
00:15:40,941 --> 00:15:44,987
There's a new iconic profile
about to be typed up by one Trent Crimm.
359
00:15:45,070 --> 00:15:46,446
Tighten up those lines!
360
00:15:47,281 --> 00:15:48,365
Let 'em know, Coach.
361
00:15:50,784 --> 00:15:51,785
Come on.
362
00:15:52,995 --> 00:15:53,996
Get a towel.
363
00:15:54,079 --> 00:15:55,998
-[Nathan] Oh, God. No, no, no.
-[Colin] Get a towel.
364
00:15:56,081 --> 00:15:59,042
-Let go. Please, God. Stop it. No.
-[Roy] Oi, oi!
365
00:15:59,126 --> 00:16:00,627
What the fuck are you doing?
366
00:16:01,420 --> 00:16:03,046
Jamie not talk to you
about leaving him alone?
367
00:16:07,176 --> 00:16:08,844
Fuck's sake.
368
00:16:14,892 --> 00:16:16,476
[wolf whistle]
369
00:16:17,978 --> 00:16:20,105
-You look like you've forgotten something.
-Hi, Keeley.
370
00:16:20,189 --> 00:16:22,941
I'm looking for your prick boyfriend.
You know how to pick 'em, don't ya?
371
00:16:23,025 --> 00:16:26,820
Um, didn't your last girlfriend steal
your Rolex and sell it for drug money?
372
00:16:26,904 --> 00:16:29,489
So? I don't need a phone and a watch.
373
00:16:30,282 --> 00:16:32,868
Look, I didn't sign up
to be your boyfriend's minder, okay?
374
00:16:32,951 --> 00:16:35,787
But the new gaffer's
trying to make me feel responsible
375
00:16:35,871 --> 00:16:39,374
for fucking Nate,
whose last name I don't even know.
376
00:16:39,458 --> 00:16:40,626
It's Barnes.
377
00:16:40,709 --> 00:16:41,752
No. It's Shelley.
378
00:16:41,835 --> 00:16:42,836
[chuckling] Yeah, I know.
379
00:16:42,920 --> 00:16:44,213
I don't like being tricked.
380
00:16:44,296 --> 00:16:48,133
Not by you and not by,
[mocking] "Howdy y'all, cowboys.
381
00:16:48,217 --> 00:16:51,136
My name is Ted Lasso and I'm from Kansas."
382
00:16:51,220 --> 00:16:52,679
[imitates gunshots]
383
00:16:53,514 --> 00:16:56,183
Wow, you're, like,
really, really bad at impressions, man.
384
00:16:56,266 --> 00:17:01,230
I know he's trying to push my buttons,
but I cannot be manipulated.
385
00:17:01,313 --> 00:17:04,316
Come on. I could push all of your buttons
right now if I wanted to.
386
00:17:04,398 --> 00:17:06,276
-No, you couldn't, Keeley--
-I think, actually, I could.
387
00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:08,529
-You couldn't, Keeley-- No, Keeley.
-What was that? I can't seem to hear you.
388
00:17:08,612 --> 00:17:10,739
-Keeley, if you would listen to me--
-I'm trying to listen to you.
389
00:17:10,821 --> 00:17:12,074
-I could tell you why--
-So tell me.
390
00:17:13,032 --> 00:17:14,701
Is that making you mad?
391
00:17:17,579 --> 00:17:18,579
No.
392
00:17:21,708 --> 00:17:26,088
[mocking] "I'm Roy Kent
and I get paid to play a game,
393
00:17:26,171 --> 00:17:28,423
but I'm mad all the time."
394
00:17:28,507 --> 00:17:29,758
[grunts]
395
00:17:30,884 --> 00:17:32,219
[chuckles]
396
00:17:34,179 --> 00:17:35,430
That's actually pretty good.
397
00:17:43,814 --> 00:17:45,065
-Hey, Trent.
-Mm?
398
00:17:45,148 --> 00:17:47,401
-You know who you remind me of right now?
-No. Who?
399
00:17:47,484 --> 00:17:48,986
One of them robot vacuums.
400
00:17:49,987 --> 00:17:51,822
Just kinda wandering around
looking for dirt.
401
00:17:51,905 --> 00:17:53,574
-Roomba.
-That's the one.
402
00:17:54,283 --> 00:17:55,826
-Actually, I have a question.
-Mm-hmm.
403
00:17:55,909 --> 00:17:57,870
After your resounding loss
to Crystal Palace,
404
00:17:57,953 --> 00:18:00,706
one of your players said
there was a party in the locker room.
405
00:18:00,789 --> 00:18:03,834
Do you feel it sends the right message
having a party after a loss?
406
00:18:04,960 --> 00:18:08,380
Well, Trent, I've never really concerned
myself too much with wins and losses.
407
00:18:08,463 --> 00:18:10,507
Now that's a quote I'll probably use.
408
00:18:10,591 --> 00:18:11,592
You should get going.
409
00:18:12,217 --> 00:18:13,886
Hey, will you let Roy know
we're heading out soon?
410
00:18:13,969 --> 00:18:15,220
-Copy.
-Thanks, Coach.
411
00:18:15,304 --> 00:18:18,473
You wanna tag along?
We're gonna go speak to some schoolkids.
412
00:18:18,557 --> 00:18:20,058
Oh, what a coincidence.
413
00:18:20,142 --> 00:18:23,270
The day of our interview you just happen
to be visiting a local school.
414
00:18:23,353 --> 00:18:25,731
Well, that's the funny thing
about coincidences, ain't it?
415
00:18:26,523 --> 00:18:27,816
Sometimes they just happen.
416
00:18:28,734 --> 00:18:29,902
Come on now.
417
00:18:30,819 --> 00:18:32,571
-[knocking]
-Come in.
418
00:18:32,654 --> 00:18:35,991
I just wanted to come and thank you again
for stopping that picture from running.
419
00:18:36,575 --> 00:18:37,826
And I bought you a present.
420
00:18:42,289 --> 00:18:43,415
Made me think of you.
421
00:18:44,374 --> 00:18:45,918
It's strong and a bit prickly.
422
00:18:49,254 --> 00:18:51,089
You know, I've decided to
not be scared of you anymore.
423
00:18:51,715 --> 00:18:52,841
I didn't know you were.
424
00:18:52,925 --> 00:18:54,885
Oh, yeah.
I was, like, fucking terrified of you.
425
00:18:54,968 --> 00:18:57,679
My God,
Jamie would have been so pissed off
426
00:18:57,763 --> 00:19:00,057
with reporters poking around
in our love life. [groans]
427
00:19:01,099 --> 00:19:03,477
I don't know why I'm telling you.
You know all about that, don't you?
428
00:19:03,560 --> 00:19:05,062
Remember when you got divorced?
429
00:19:05,562 --> 00:19:06,688
It rings a bell.
430
00:19:06,772 --> 00:19:08,690
Yeah, I mean, didn't it,
like, make you really mad
431
00:19:08,774 --> 00:19:10,442
that they went after you and not Rupert?
432
00:19:10,526 --> 00:19:13,153
'Cause he was the one that cheated
and he came across like Prince Charming.
433
00:19:13,237 --> 00:19:15,531
It really pissed me off.
434
00:19:16,448 --> 00:19:18,909
Well, the press are never awful to men.
435
00:19:19,451 --> 00:19:22,621
No one ever pays a fortune for a photo
of a naked man on a yacht in Mallorca
436
00:19:22,704 --> 00:19:23,914
a week after his divorce.
437
00:19:23,997 --> 00:19:26,250
Whoa. That's like
a very specific scenario.
438
00:19:26,333 --> 00:19:28,961
Oh, my God. That means
there's a picture of you naked on a yacht.
439
00:19:29,044 --> 00:19:30,003
Can I see it? Is it here?
440
00:19:30,087 --> 00:19:33,340
Come on. You wouldn't have said something
if you weren't dying to show someone.
441
00:19:33,882 --> 00:19:34,883
Please.
442
00:19:35,884 --> 00:19:36,927
[sighs]
443
00:19:37,010 --> 00:19:40,389
It was taken from a helicopter
while I was sunbathing.
444
00:19:40,472 --> 00:19:41,974
[gasps]
445
00:19:42,057 --> 00:19:44,142
Holy shit, Rebecca.
446
00:19:44,685 --> 00:19:46,061
Are those your real tits?
447
00:19:46,144 --> 00:19:48,522
I feel like a teenage boy.
I can't stop staring at them.
448
00:19:48,605 --> 00:19:50,357
Where did you get those?
449
00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:51,525
My mum.
450
00:19:51,608 --> 00:19:53,360
I can't believe
you stopped this from running.
451
00:19:53,443 --> 00:19:54,736
I would have shown everyone.
452
00:19:54,820 --> 00:19:57,656
Right. I-I really need to get on.
453
00:19:58,490 --> 00:19:59,783
Oh, sorry. Yeah.
454
00:20:00,242 --> 00:20:01,243
Thank you.
455
00:20:02,077 --> 00:20:03,370
[Keeley clears throat]
456
00:20:04,913 --> 00:20:05,956
Bye.
457
00:20:06,707 --> 00:20:07,708
Shoes.
458
00:20:08,542 --> 00:20:10,252
Shoes. Yes.
459
00:20:11,712 --> 00:20:13,213
Wow, you really blew my brains out
460
00:20:13,297 --> 00:20:15,257
with those beautiful breasts of yours,
Rebecca.
461
00:20:17,426 --> 00:20:19,469
-[school bell rings]
-[chattering]
462
00:20:28,520 --> 00:20:30,439
-[clears throat]
-[chattering stops]
463
00:20:30,522 --> 00:20:32,858
When I first saw
our school football squad,
464
00:20:33,609 --> 00:20:36,820
I didn't think that Richmond Primary
would win a single game,
465
00:20:37,404 --> 00:20:39,781
much less the league championship.
466
00:20:40,407 --> 00:20:42,409
[cheering]
467
00:20:46,955 --> 00:20:48,582
[applause stops]
468
00:20:48,665 --> 00:20:53,212
To celebrate, please welcome
the new manager of AFC Richmond,
469
00:20:53,295 --> 00:20:54,796
Ed Lasso.
470
00:20:54,880 --> 00:20:56,465
[scattered applause]
471
00:20:57,299 --> 00:20:58,800
Thank you. I appreciate you.
472
00:20:58,884 --> 00:21:01,220
All right. Hey, gang. How y'all doing?
473
00:21:02,179 --> 00:21:04,014
-[boy] Wanker.
-Jacob.
474
00:21:04,097 --> 00:21:05,265
[laughter]
475
00:21:05,766 --> 00:21:06,850
It's all right.
476
00:21:06,934 --> 00:21:08,810
Uh, look, I just wanted to come down
477
00:21:08,894 --> 00:21:11,021
and congratulate y'all
on a heck of a season.
478
00:21:11,104 --> 00:21:14,274
But hey, I know someone else
who's really excited to meet all of ya.
479
00:21:14,358 --> 00:21:15,943
So if you please help me welcome
480
00:21:16,026 --> 00:21:19,863
the captain of your AFC Richmond squad,
Roy Kent.
481
00:21:19,947 --> 00:21:22,324
[cheering]
482
00:21:22,407 --> 00:21:25,244
[chanting] Roy! Roy! Roy! Roy!
483
00:21:25,786 --> 00:21:27,412
Right. [clears throat]
484
00:21:27,496 --> 00:21:32,084
Never been much for public speaking
or school, really.
485
00:21:32,793 --> 00:21:34,586
Always seemed like a waste of time to me.
486
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:38,924
-[boy sniffles]
-[girl coughs]
487
00:21:39,007 --> 00:21:41,260
Why don't we
get out of this stuffy auditorium,
488
00:21:41,343 --> 00:21:43,470
go out on the pitch
and have a proper fuck-about?
489
00:21:43,554 --> 00:21:45,138
[gasping]
490
00:21:46,056 --> 00:21:48,684
[cheering, screaming]
491
00:21:56,066 --> 00:21:57,818
I think it's really cool you do this.
492
00:21:57,901 --> 00:21:59,945
Only doing it
'cause my fucking niece goes here.
493
00:22:00,028 --> 00:22:02,614
-Oh, yeah? Which one is she?
-That idiot.
494
00:22:06,285 --> 00:22:07,536
Oh, boy, here she comes.
495
00:22:08,287 --> 00:22:09,621
Can we do headers, Uncle Roy?
496
00:22:09,705 --> 00:22:10,998
Yeah, all right. Come on then.
497
00:22:12,124 --> 00:22:13,792
All right. Come on, you lot. Line up.
498
00:22:13,876 --> 00:22:15,752
Heads. Lovely.
499
00:22:15,836 --> 00:22:17,546
Next. Go. Perfect.
500
00:22:17,629 --> 00:22:19,173
Next. Heads.
501
00:22:19,840 --> 00:22:20,841
Next.
502
00:22:23,385 --> 00:22:24,803
Well done. Next.
503
00:22:27,139 --> 00:22:28,140
Ooh, ooh!
504
00:22:28,223 --> 00:22:30,559
Next. Sweet.
505
00:22:30,976 --> 00:22:32,060
Lovely. I liked it.
506
00:22:33,937 --> 00:22:35,189
-Good.
-Roy, come on.
507
00:22:35,272 --> 00:22:37,065
You hop in there, show 'em how it's done.
I'll do a couple.
508
00:22:37,149 --> 00:22:38,442
How you doing? Ready? Come on.
509
00:22:38,525 --> 00:22:40,027
Ooh, that's the spot. Come on.
510
00:22:40,110 --> 00:22:42,237
Here we go, Phoebe.
Let's see what you got.
511
00:22:42,321 --> 00:22:45,157
Hey, nice catch. We might have
ourselves a goalie. [grunts]
512
00:22:45,240 --> 00:22:47,284
[groans] Boy, oh boy.
That was right in the button.
513
00:22:47,367 --> 00:22:48,285
Aah.
514
00:22:48,785 --> 00:22:49,620
Good job, Phoebe.
515
00:22:50,662 --> 00:22:51,997
[school bell rings]
516
00:22:54,791 --> 00:22:56,418
[Ted] Oh! Oh boy.
517
00:22:56,502 --> 00:22:57,920
Sorry about the blood there.
518
00:22:59,421 --> 00:23:00,422
There you go.
519
00:23:00,506 --> 00:23:01,757
Don't use it to clone me.
520
00:23:01,840 --> 00:23:04,051
Nice meeting you. Take care now.
521
00:23:05,260 --> 00:23:07,763
That's the longest anyone's ever stayed
for something like this.
522
00:23:07,846 --> 00:23:09,598
-Hey, thanks for having us.
-Cheers.
523
00:23:09,681 --> 00:23:10,682
Thanks again.
524
00:23:11,183 --> 00:23:13,185
[laughs] Roy, that was a blast.
525
00:23:13,268 --> 00:23:15,729
And I tell you what, that niece of yours
is a real cutie patootie.
526
00:23:15,812 --> 00:23:19,900
Enough. I've had it with your mind games
and your stupid gifts.
527
00:23:19,983 --> 00:23:22,402
I mean, what even is A Wrinkle in Time?
528
00:23:22,486 --> 00:23:24,112
It's a lovely novel.
529
00:23:24,196 --> 00:23:27,241
It's the story of a young girl's struggle
with the burden of leadership
530
00:23:27,324 --> 00:23:28,659
as she journeys through space.
531
00:23:29,618 --> 00:23:30,619
Yeah. That's it.
532
00:23:32,204 --> 00:23:33,789
Am I supposed to be the little girl?
533
00:23:34,331 --> 00:23:35,415
I'd like you to be.
534
00:23:36,375 --> 00:23:38,168
Right. None of this matters.
535
00:23:38,252 --> 00:23:40,379
'Cause I'm just doing
what everyone in this town is doing,
536
00:23:40,462 --> 00:23:42,381
and I'm counting down the days
until you're gone.
537
00:23:42,464 --> 00:23:44,466
Trent, you're a colossal prick.
You always have been.
538
00:23:46,260 --> 00:23:47,511
Phoebe, come on.
539
00:23:53,600 --> 00:23:55,561
-Are you hungry?
-Hmm.
540
00:23:56,019 --> 00:23:57,020
[Trent] Little tradition.
541
00:23:59,481 --> 00:24:01,066
Let battle commence.
542
00:24:01,525 --> 00:24:02,734
Ted Lasso?
543
00:24:02,818 --> 00:24:05,195
-Hey there, Ollie.
-Leave it out. What are you doing here?
544
00:24:05,279 --> 00:24:06,738
Well, I mean, you invited me, remember?
545
00:24:06,822 --> 00:24:08,824
I invite every person
who's been in my car.
546
00:24:08,907 --> 00:24:11,368
Oh. Hey, Ollie. This is my friend Trent.
547
00:24:11,451 --> 00:24:13,495
-Trent, this is my buddy Ollie.
-Pleased to meet you.
548
00:24:13,579 --> 00:24:15,789
Congrats. You both just met a cool person.
549
00:24:15,873 --> 00:24:18,041
[laughs] Right, gentlemen.
You know what you're having?
550
00:24:18,625 --> 00:24:20,502
Yeah. Well, you know,
whatever the chef recommends.
551
00:24:20,586 --> 00:24:24,047
Uh, that would be my father-in-law.
Are you okay with a little bit of spice?
552
00:24:24,131 --> 00:24:26,466
Have him make it for us
like we're a couple members of the family.
553
00:24:26,550 --> 00:24:28,135
[chuckles] You're a brave man.
554
00:24:31,138 --> 00:24:33,015
Oh, man. Mad respect.
555
00:24:33,098 --> 00:24:35,267
That might not be the wisest of choices.
556
00:24:36,727 --> 00:24:38,812
[Ollie] Here you go, boys. [exhales]
557
00:24:38,896 --> 00:24:40,147
-Dig in.
-[Ted] Can't wait.
558
00:24:40,230 --> 00:24:42,316
The smell's already deep inside my brain.
559
00:24:42,399 --> 00:24:44,943
-Gonna love it.
-I appreciate it.
560
00:24:45,027 --> 00:24:47,738
I can't imagine
they have good Indian food in Kansas.
561
00:24:47,821 --> 00:24:50,365
Oh, I have no idea.
I've never had Indian food.
562
00:24:57,039 --> 00:24:59,374
-Whoo!
-Ooh.
563
00:25:00,375 --> 00:25:02,044
-[chuckles]
-[Trent grunts]
564
00:25:02,127 --> 00:25:03,712
Wow, that-- I mean, that's hot.
565
00:25:03,795 --> 00:25:06,840
Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy.
Feel like I'm about to breathe fire.
566
00:25:07,216 --> 00:25:08,759
[Trent clears throat]
567
00:25:08,842 --> 00:25:09,927
I don't think I can eat that.
568
00:25:10,802 --> 00:25:13,013
What? No, no, no. Come on now.
We gotta put a decent dent in this,
569
00:25:13,096 --> 00:25:15,390
otherwise we're gonna embarrass Ollie
in front of his family.
570
00:25:15,933 --> 00:25:19,061
-No, really, I can't.
-Come on, just dump it on my plate.
571
00:25:19,853 --> 00:25:20,938
[exhales]
572
00:25:21,021 --> 00:25:22,648
Yeah, yeah. You're good.
573
00:25:22,731 --> 00:25:25,317
So, if you love Kansas so much,
why did you--
574
00:25:26,109 --> 00:25:30,197
Why did you leave to coach a sport
you can barely-- you know anything about?
575
00:25:30,280 --> 00:25:31,281
Was it just the money?
576
00:25:31,865 --> 00:25:33,575
Wait, I'm supposed to be getting paid?
577
00:25:33,659 --> 00:25:34,826
Are you enjoying the food?
578
00:25:35,285 --> 00:25:37,120
Tell your father-in-law it's perfect.
579
00:25:37,204 --> 00:25:39,081
Ha! Dad! He says it's perfect!
580
00:25:41,041 --> 00:25:42,084
-Ted.
-Mm-hmm?
581
00:25:42,167 --> 00:25:43,794
What you're doing is irresponsible.
582
00:25:44,253 --> 00:25:46,255
This club actually means something
to this town.
583
00:25:46,839 --> 00:25:47,881
I know that.
584
00:25:47,965 --> 00:25:48,966
I do.
585
00:25:49,591 --> 00:25:51,134
Trent, what do you love?
586
00:25:53,220 --> 00:25:54,221
Is it writing?
587
00:25:55,389 --> 00:25:56,223
-Yes.
-Yeah.
588
00:25:56,306 --> 00:25:57,808
Well, good, 'cause you're darn good at it.
589
00:25:58,225 --> 00:25:59,434
-Thank you.
-You're welcome.
590
00:25:59,518 --> 00:26:01,436
Me? I love coaching.
591
00:26:02,020 --> 00:26:03,146
Now, I'm gonna say this again
592
00:26:03,230 --> 00:26:05,774
just so you didn't think
it was a mistake the first time I said it.
593
00:26:05,858 --> 00:26:08,026
For me,
success is not about the wins and losses.
594
00:26:08,610 --> 00:26:11,280
It's about helping these young fellas
be the best versions of themselves
595
00:26:11,363 --> 00:26:12,364
on and off the field.
596
00:26:12,865 --> 00:26:14,283
And it ain't always easy, Trent,
597
00:26:14,366 --> 00:26:18,036
but neither is growing up
without someone believing in you.
598
00:26:19,705 --> 00:26:20,831
Let me ask you this.
599
00:26:21,874 --> 00:26:23,542
Is my tongue still in my mouth?
600
00:26:23,625 --> 00:26:26,044
'Cause I am about to hallucinate
from all the heat here.
601
00:26:29,047 --> 00:26:30,048
I really should go.
602
00:26:31,175 --> 00:26:33,552
-Deadlines and all.
-Hey, gotta do the work.
603
00:26:33,635 --> 00:26:34,887
Hey, I'll say this though.
604
00:26:34,970 --> 00:26:37,139
I really enjoyed getting to
spend this time with you, Trent.
605
00:26:38,265 --> 00:26:39,474
You actually mean that, don't you?
606
00:26:41,894 --> 00:26:42,811
Yeah.
607
00:26:44,188 --> 00:26:45,564
-Thank you.
-You're welcome.
608
00:26:46,106 --> 00:26:46,940
[Ollie] You all right?
609
00:26:48,025 --> 00:26:50,027
Normally, one dish is plenty,
610
00:26:50,110 --> 00:26:52,779
but we know how
you Americans like to eat, innit?
611
00:26:53,405 --> 00:26:55,365
-Let's do it, huh?
-[both chuckle]
612
00:26:55,449 --> 00:26:56,575
Try that one.
613
00:26:57,242 --> 00:26:58,285
[exhales]
614
00:27:00,704 --> 00:27:01,705
Whoo!
615
00:27:03,373 --> 00:27:06,126
-Beautiful, right?
-It's beyond beautiful. It's hot.
616
00:27:08,837 --> 00:27:10,881
"Mrs. Which's voice was grave.
617
00:27:11,673 --> 00:27:13,175
'What do you understand?'
618
00:27:14,051 --> 00:27:15,469
'That it has to be me.
619
00:27:16,303 --> 00:27:17,763
Can't be anyone else.'"
620
00:27:22,267 --> 00:27:23,352
Fuck!
621
00:27:24,144 --> 00:27:26,146
That's a bad word, Uncle Roy.
622
00:27:26,230 --> 00:27:27,898
Oh, mind your own business, Phoebe.
623
00:27:32,277 --> 00:27:33,278
Be good.
624
00:27:33,362 --> 00:27:34,363
[kisses]
625
00:27:38,242 --> 00:27:39,451
[sighs]
626
00:27:40,786 --> 00:27:43,997
-Yes?
-I have an advance copy of the article.
627
00:27:45,582 --> 00:27:48,627
-Read it to me.
-Title: "Wayward Ted."
628
00:27:49,336 --> 00:27:52,422
"Whatever you think of Ted Lasso
as a football coach,
629
00:27:52,506 --> 00:27:56,218
I assure you,
the truth is harder to swallow."
630
00:27:56,301 --> 00:27:59,012
-Hey, how you doing?
-Good. How's your nose, Coach?
631
00:27:59,096 --> 00:28:01,557
-It's fine. Thank you for asking.
-[Higgins] "And swallow you must,
632
00:28:01,640 --> 00:28:04,059
because Ted is out there in the community
633
00:28:04,142 --> 00:28:07,855
either bravely
or stupidly facing the music."
634
00:28:07,938 --> 00:28:10,023
-Hey, fellas. How you doing?
-"That's for you to decide."
635
00:28:10,107 --> 00:28:11,859
Piss off, wanker!
636
00:28:11,942 --> 00:28:13,110
[grunts]
637
00:28:13,819 --> 00:28:15,404
-Hi.
-Yeah.
638
00:28:15,487 --> 00:28:17,030
-Stop it.
-Every time.
639
00:28:17,114 --> 00:28:19,408
[Higgins] "And yes, he's in over his head.
640
00:28:19,491 --> 00:28:23,704
He insisted twice that he didn't care
if Richmond won or lost.
641
00:28:23,787 --> 00:28:28,250
But if the Lasso way is wrong,
it's hard to imagine being right."
642
00:28:29,501 --> 00:28:30,711
Mm.
643
00:28:30,794 --> 00:28:32,129
Why have you stopped reading?
644
00:28:32,212 --> 00:28:33,213
[stammers]
645
00:28:33,297 --> 00:28:37,176
Please do me the favor of remembering that
these aren't my words, it's Trent Crimm.
646
00:28:38,051 --> 00:28:39,052
Keep going.
647
00:28:40,262 --> 00:28:42,514
-"In a business that celebrates ego,
-[Trent] ...celebrates ego,
648
00:28:42,598 --> 00:28:43,974
-Ted reins his in."
-Ted reins his in.
649
00:28:44,057 --> 00:28:48,478
[Trent] His coaching style is subtle.
It never hits you over the head.
650
00:28:48,562 --> 00:28:51,607
Hello, Roy.
I didn't know it was a retirement party.
651
00:28:51,690 --> 00:28:53,734
-[Roy grunts]
-[gasps]
652
00:28:53,817 --> 00:28:54,818
Shit!
653
00:28:55,319 --> 00:28:56,570
Stop messing with Nate!
654
00:28:57,321 --> 00:28:58,780
Now, I don't know
which one of you I nutted,
655
00:28:58,864 --> 00:29:00,240
'cause I don't
see so well at night anymore,
656
00:29:00,324 --> 00:29:01,366
but that goes for all of you!
657
00:29:02,159 --> 00:29:05,996
[Trent] Slowly growing until you can
no longer ignore its presence.
658
00:29:06,914 --> 00:29:08,081
Vanilla vodka.
659
00:29:09,291 --> 00:29:10,292
Such a child.
660
00:29:12,669 --> 00:29:13,795
Keeley.
661
00:29:13,879 --> 00:29:14,880
Roy.
662
00:29:15,506 --> 00:29:18,342
[Trent] Whether that means
allowing followers to become leaders...
663
00:29:18,425 --> 00:29:20,010
[rumbling]
664
00:29:20,093 --> 00:29:23,305
...or in a show of respect,
eating food so spicy
665
00:29:23,388 --> 00:29:26,558
it's sure to wreak massive havoc
on his intestinal system.
666
00:29:26,642 --> 00:29:27,935
Keys, keys, keys.
667
00:29:28,018 --> 00:29:30,020
-[keys jingle]
-Okay, here we go. Oh boy. Oh boy.
668
00:29:30,103 --> 00:29:32,773
[Trent] And though I believe that
Ted Lasso will fail here
669
00:29:32,856 --> 00:29:35,901
and Richmond will suffer
the embarrassment of relegation,
670
00:29:37,027 --> 00:29:38,862
-I won't gloat when it happens.
-[exhales]
671
00:29:40,030 --> 00:29:42,074
Because I can't help but root for him.
672
00:29:42,783 --> 00:29:45,327
[groans] Fuck!
673
00:29:46,954 --> 00:29:49,957
[classical music playing]