1
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(《民族日報》
模特兒泳池派對亂況)

2
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去死吧!

3
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Siri,打給死肥仔

4
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早晨

5
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《太陽報》沒有報導乜都得和琪麗

6
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一句也沒有提,你在辦公室嗎?

7
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當然在

8
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那現在馬上過來

9
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拜拜,各位乖仔,跟媽媽說我愛她

10
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叩叩,老闆,我不知道你過得怎樣

11
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但我渡過了一個美好的星期日

12
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給你的

13
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終於去了大笨鐘

14
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我想那是我看過最大的鐘

15
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我小時候,父母帶我去看

16
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密爾瓦基的艾倫布拉德利鐘樓

17
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他們最後把我獨自留在那裡

18
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對,3小時42分鐘
你知道我是如何知道的嗎?

19
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你看著時鐘?

20
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我看著時鐘,沒錯,猜對了

21
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其實很難猜到

22
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但你馬上便想到了,真聰明

23
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-乜都得
-是

24
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純粹跟你剛剛談到有關時間

25
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很不幸我有點忙

26
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我要開個品牌會議,所以...

27
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我常常覺得牛很可憐

28
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但你一定要這樣做,不然牠們便會走掉

29
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這是有關品牌的笑話

30
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如果我們現時身處堪薩斯

31
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我要坐著等你笑完,對

32
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我們明天再見,好嗎?

33
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-好,期待跟你再見
-好,我也是

34
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(乜都得教練)

35
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好,看看是怎樣的,守門員在這裡

36
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然後他們會在這裡,對嗎?

37
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走到這邊,走到那邊

38
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他會走下來這裡

39
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水晶宮上個星期大勝我們

40
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這是我們現時的進攻策略

41
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我覺得很差勁!

42
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把全部抹走

43
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你可能會想為甚麼我都畫出來
然後又抹掉

44
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這是因為我深信象徵式動作

45
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我也是

46
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你昨晚甚麼時候回家?

47
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-沒有回去
-真的嗎?

48
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看,我們現時的進攻方式是傳球跑位

49
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把球傳給占美,其他人便無所事事

50
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我認真在想新的方案,你聽到嗎?

51
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-你有甚麼想法嗎,尼敦?
-沒有

52
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所以...

53
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不...天啊,沒關係,不好意思

54
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沒事的,你是我們的一份子
來吧,即管說出來,你有甚麼意見?

55
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好吧,就是...不,另一個褲袋

56
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這是我的一些想法

57
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對不起,天啊

58
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不是那張

59
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不是甚麼好建議

60
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其實很差的,真是尷尬

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-我就是...
-對不起,尼敦

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別人沒信心時我很難聽得清楚

63
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讓我快快再問你個問題

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-你覺得這個建議會有效嗎?
-對,我覺得會

65
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-為甚麼你會對著我們大叫,尼敦?
-天啊!

66
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我們就在你面前

67
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好,來吧,跟我們講解一下

68
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好,我想如果我們從一側開始進攻

69
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占美可跑到另一側

70
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後衛球員會跟著他,森可以補他的位置

71
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把占美當成餌?

72
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不

73
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不,對,在這個策略上是

74
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來試試吧

75
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甚麼,你要用我的戰術?

76
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對,我們會來試試,看看是否可行

77
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未必可行

78
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又說一次,如果這個戰術可行

79
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我可能會在比賽上採用

80
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感覺很好,讓我想跳一下舞

81
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我想“我喜歡,喜歡這個方案的感覺”

82
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跳你的舞步給他看,教練

83
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對,就是這樣...就是這樣跳

84
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你也跳給我們看,尼敦,來吧

85
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加油,尼敦,也可以這樣跳

86
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很好

87
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你看來有點生氣,但沒關係

88
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是我的錯,我忘記了球場在那邊

89
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來吧,這邊,加油

90
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繼續跳

91
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-我們晚點見
-好

92
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乜都得!喂,你有空嗎?

93
00:04:56,588 --> 00:04:59,675
-有...有甚麼事嗎?
-對,不,沒事

94
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-不是沒有事,糟透了
-不

95
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這會成為《太陽報》今天的頭版

96
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“領隊偷食球星女友”

97
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我覺得更貼切的目標會是

98
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“領隊天真餵食年輕女子
二人關係不明”

99
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乜都得,這很大件事!

100
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除了我在這張相看起來過份地索

101
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不,光線也很美

102
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我在報館工作的朋友說
可以拖延這單消息一天

103
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當是幫我

104
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如果這段新聞出版了,占美會發瘋

105
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狗仔隊會來滋擾我們

106
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對...

107
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我的下一張相不會這麼完美

108
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我會是合眼開口,就像這樣...

109
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-猜到時的標題會是甚麼
-上帝保佑你?

110
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“占美被女友弄得心傷死”

111
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-你是剛剛作的嗎?
-對

112
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-所有人都會看這則新聞
-當然

113
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你不知道押韻在這個爛鬼國家的威力

114
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對

115
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“拉素帶領球隊輸得一面倒”

116
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琪麗真會作押韻句

117
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對,我很可愛,押韻也作得很精彩

118
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天啊,難怪他們想摧毀我

119
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對...

120
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對不起,我這麼久才上到來

121
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我剛剛...被很多人截停

122
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還是甚麼都沒有

123
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要找人報導乜都得和琪麗

124
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-喂,老闆
-乜都得!還有琪麗,大家好

125
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嗨,我在大堂看到的,對

126
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我們遇到些問題

127
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來吧,拿照片給她看,對

128
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看?《太陽報》明天便會刊登這張照片

129
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說真的

130
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這些人絲毫不懂尊重他人的私隱和尊嚴

131
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對,我要找出拍這張照片的混蛋
和聘請這個人的人

132
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不...不用這樣

133
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我認識這間報館的老闆
我打個電話就可以阻止這件事了

134
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真的嗎?天啊,謝謝你

135
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看,我就告訴過你,對吧?

136
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這位女士自信強悍

137
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老闆,我不想看你跟米歇爾拗手瓜

138
00:07:00,295 --> 00:07:02,256
但又忍不住不看

139
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從沒有人這樣讚過我

140
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-你真是手瓜起
-對

141
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也沒有人這樣讚過我
但很高興能幫到你們

142
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-對...
-謝謝你

143
00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:15,352
-好
-晚點見

144
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她怎樣也不會追查到那張照片
是我拍的,對吧?

145
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-對
-你是說“她能追查到嗎”?

146
00:07:22,192 --> 00:07:24,194
你沒有用假名或者太空電話嗎?

147
00:07:24,278 --> 00:07:29,575
我不是間諜,莉碧嘉
我只是個足球營運總監

148
00:07:29,658 --> 00:07:31,743
兩者都做得十分出色

149
00:07:31,827 --> 00:07:34,538
謝謝你,等等...

150
00:07:35,998 --> 00:07:38,709
好,開始了,森傳球給迪臣

151
00:07:38,792 --> 00:07:39,668
好,踢得好

152
00:07:42,087 --> 00:07:43,881
傳給班伯奇

153
00:07:44,339 --> 00:07:46,550
占美一路扮餌

154
00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:48,760
-森空曬
-入球了!

155
00:07:56,435 --> 00:07:58,187
好戰術,尼敦,你覺得如何?

156
00:07:58,270 --> 00:08:01,523
我不知道,有很多新感覺,對

157
00:08:01,607 --> 00:08:03,025
就像第一次長陰毛,對嗎?

158
00:08:03,108 --> 00:08:04,109
-對,甚麼?
-好了

159
00:08:04,568 --> 00:08:06,945
好,喂,踢得好

160
00:08:07,029 --> 00:08:08,030
好了,各位

161
00:08:08,113 --> 00:08:09,615
我們現在要開始集中訓練另一個戰術

162
00:08:09,698 --> 00:08:11,909
要從進攻快速回防

163
00:08:11,992 --> 00:08:15,120
你們要開始快速回防,明白嗎?

164
00:08:15,204 --> 00:08:17,247
要做得好就要多練習

165
00:08:17,331 --> 00:08:20,083
除此之外,你們都做得很好

166
00:08:20,167 --> 00:08:23,128
我們大家一起跑兩個圈

167
00:08:23,212 --> 00:08:26,548
跑得比我慢的人要多跑四個圈,開始!

168
00:08:27,132 --> 00:08:30,052
-來吧,讓我看看你的本事
-發生甚麼事?

169
00:08:34,139 --> 00:08:36,058
你追上來了,不要跑入圈!

170
00:08:36,140 --> 00:08:38,101
來吧,你追不到我的,我是薑餅人

171
00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:39,520
跑快點!

172
00:08:41,730 --> 00:08:43,565
-看看他的樣子
-哥連、艾石,停手

173
00:08:43,982 --> 00:08:45,651
對,真的很痛...

174
00:08:45,734 --> 00:08:47,945
小心,哥連,他是我們的新教練

175
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:49,696
-對
-對

176
00:08:49,780 --> 00:08:50,948
對不起,領隊

177
00:08:52,074 --> 00:08:53,075
謝謝你

178
00:08:56,912 --> 00:08:59,248
好,今天大家做得很好

179
00:08:59,331 --> 00:09:01,208
你們跑得比我快得多

180
00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:02,876
除了鬍鬚教練

181
00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:05,170
怎會這樣?我以為你高中時玩田徑的

182
00:09:05,254 --> 00:09:06,255
我是下棋隊的,教練

183
00:09:06,338 --> 00:09:07,506
伊利諾伊州冠軍

184
00:09:07,589 --> 00:09:09,383
對,伊利諾伊是個州

185
00:09:09,466 --> 00:09:12,302
最後一件事,你們全部人的儲物櫃內
都有一件禮物

186
00:09:12,386 --> 00:09:14,805
在櫃子內,希望你們喜歡

187
00:09:22,020 --> 00:09:24,773
(歐森史考特卡德,《戰爭遊戲》)

188
00:09:25,816 --> 00:09:27,734
(弗朗西斯斯科特菲茨杰拉德
《美麗與毀滅》)

189
00:09:28,569 --> 00:09:29,903
是本爛鬼書

190
00:09:33,073 --> 00:09:35,325
(馬德琳恩格爾,《時間的皺摺》)

191
00:09:37,411 --> 00:09:39,371
(我們是列治文隊)

192
00:09:40,581 --> 00:09:41,707
好戰術,傻仔

193
00:09:48,338 --> 00:09:50,257
-喂
-我只是想你知道

194
00:09:50,340 --> 00:09:52,926
尼敦每天都被...

195
00:09:53,010 --> 00:09:56,013
占美和他的兄弟...戲弄

196
00:09:56,722 --> 00:09:58,348
-對
-你早就知道?

197
00:09:58,432 --> 00:09:59,474
對

198
00:09:59,558 --> 00:10:01,143
你會處理?

199
00:10:01,226 --> 00:10:02,311
不會

200
00:10:03,687 --> 00:10:04,771
咩話?

201
00:10:04,855 --> 00:10:07,816
羅伊,我在布魯克斯小學

202
00:10:07,900 --> 00:10:10,819
小朋友的打鬥中學會了二大原則

203
00:10:11,486 --> 00:10:14,489
一,如果羅尼費殊請你吃糖

204
00:10:14,573 --> 00:10:17,075
你要馬上拒絕並立即跑走

205
00:10:17,659 --> 00:10:18,911
因為很大機會

206
00:10:18,994 --> 00:10:22,122
這個壞蛋在糖紙裡大便

207
00:10:22,831 --> 00:10:25,209
沒有人見過他這樣做
但有些人吃過

208
00:10:25,292 --> 00:10:28,420
二,如果老師叫壞學生不要欺負人

209
00:10:28,504 --> 00:10:29,838
這只會令情況更差

210
00:10:29,922 --> 00:10:31,381
所以你會放任不管?

211
00:10:32,216 --> 00:10:33,342
不

212
00:10:39,223 --> 00:10:40,432
為甚麼你要騙他?

213
00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:42,184
他就是我們的人選,教練

214
00:10:42,267 --> 00:10:44,311
如果我們想在這裡說話有份量

215
00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:47,648
就要先從這個人下手

216
00:10:57,616 --> 00:10:58,617
對

217
00:11:00,035 --> 00:11:03,747
-占美,我可以問你點事嗎?
-這重40公斤,我要做三次十下

218
00:11:04,331 --> 00:11:08,794
二頭肌和三頭肌輪流做

219
00:11:08,877 --> 00:11:11,463
我不想知道你在舉甚麼

220
00:11:11,547 --> 00:11:13,215
你想知道,因為你問我

221
00:11:14,216 --> 00:11:15,551
你舉得起40公斤嗎?

222
00:11:15,634 --> 00:11:17,511
不,但我可以把你的袋袋當沙包打

223
00:11:17,594 --> 00:11:19,721
-你想試嗎?
-不想

224
00:11:20,430 --> 00:11:22,558
你知道你在隊中的影響力嗎?

225
00:11:22,641 --> 00:11:24,476
-我是最強的
-不,你是垃圾

226
00:11:24,560 --> 00:11:28,063
但因為你有天賦,他們都很祟拜你

227
00:11:28,146 --> 00:11:29,690
這讓我懷疑我的信念

228
00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:31,483
所以當他們戲弄尼敦...

229
00:11:33,151 --> 00:11:34,278
而你開懷大笑...

230
00:11:34,820 --> 00:11:35,821
對

231
00:11:35,904 --> 00:11:37,447
...他們便會覺得沒有問題

232
00:11:37,531 --> 00:11:41,285
對,因為尼敦是個笨蛋,他無法反抗

233
00:11:46,248 --> 00:11:48,750
好,我會處理,尼敦是個好人

234
00:11:49,168 --> 00:11:50,252
好

235
00:11:51,670 --> 00:11:52,921
羅伊,你今晚來酒吧嗎?

236
00:11:53,005 --> 00:11:54,214
等等,你會去嗎?

237
00:11:54,298 --> 00:11:56,383
-當然
-那我不會去

238
00:11:57,926 --> 00:11:59,511
哥連、艾石,過來

239
00:12:01,054 --> 00:12:02,848
你知道你們常常戲弄尼敦嗎?

240
00:12:02,931 --> 00:12:04,099
-對
-對

241
00:12:07,769 --> 00:12:09,271
繼續,讓我開心一下

242
00:12:17,279 --> 00:12:19,364
-早晨,希堅斯
-早晨,我就是...

243
00:12:19,448 --> 00:12:21,909
在門口等我
所以我可以準時在這裡見到你

244
00:12:21,992 --> 00:12:24,244
沒錯,你看來很高興

245
00:12:24,328 --> 00:12:26,914
對,我是,我剛發現了一些事

246
00:12:26,997 --> 00:12:28,916
如果不刊登那張照片誰會在乎?

247
00:12:28,999 --> 00:12:30,876
最大的問題是這裡的人

248
00:12:30,959 --> 00:12:33,420
無論球隊踢得多差都會支持他們

249
00:12:34,546 --> 00:12:36,381
他們是很忠誠的球迷

250
00:12:36,465 --> 00:12:39,009
對,我覺得我可以摧毀他們

251
00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:40,093
真好

252
00:12:40,886 --> 00:12:42,095
不要

253
00:12:42,179 --> 00:12:44,139
好,我下去

254
00:12:44,223 --> 00:12:46,266
-給你的
-謝謝

255
00:12:46,350 --> 00:12:48,560
我跟《太陽報》老闆說了

256
00:12:48,644 --> 00:12:49,853
你跟太陽神說了?

257
00:12:50,479 --> 00:12:51,855
-不,那份報紙
-對

258
00:12:51,939 --> 00:12:55,526
他答應了不刊登你和琪麗的照片

259
00:12:56,151 --> 00:13:00,155
最佳球員...

260
00:13:00,239 --> 00:13:02,407
-左腳!右腳,不及左腳!
-好

261
00:13:02,491 --> 00:13:04,076
-真好!
-好,謝謝你,乜都得

262
00:13:04,159 --> 00:13:05,827
對不起,你在說話,請繼續

263
00:13:05,911 --> 00:13:06,912
作為交換的條件

264
00:13:06,995 --> 00:13:10,374
我答應了讓他聲譽更好的報紙
《獨立報》

265
00:13:10,457 --> 00:13:11,959
寫一份關於你的報導

266
00:13:12,042 --> 00:13:13,335
”與乜都得教練單對單專訪”

267
00:13:13,418 --> 00:13:14,503
好

268
00:13:14,586 --> 00:13:16,380
特倫特格林將會是那位記者

269
00:13:17,214 --> 00:13:20,217
他很厲害,球迷都很信賴他

270
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:22,678
不,我知道誰是特倫特
他很難應付

271
00:13:22,761 --> 00:13:24,972
-真的嗎?
-對,但沒問題的

272
00:13:25,055 --> 00:13:26,557
你知道要如何應對這種
難相處得塊硬曲奇的人,對嗎?

273
00:13:26,640 --> 00:13:29,017
-不
-把曲奇浸浸牛奶

274
00:13:30,394 --> 00:13:32,104
好,試試新戰術

275
00:13:36,483 --> 00:13:37,818
嗨,他來了

276
00:13:37,901 --> 00:13:39,862
你好,來自美國的乜都得教練

277
00:13:39,945 --> 00:13:42,281
你好,來自《獨立報》的特倫特格林

278
00:13:42,364 --> 00:13:44,324
很高興能跟你共處一天
一定會很有趣

279
00:13:44,408 --> 00:13:45,784
叫我乜都得就好了

280
00:13:46,785 --> 00:13:48,036
好,開始!

281
00:13:53,876 --> 00:13:54,960
空曬

282
00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:56,628
-好!
-由他踢入

283
00:14:03,468 --> 00:14:04,970
踢得好,森,你覺得如何?

284
00:14:05,053 --> 00:14:07,681
很好,教練,感覺良好

285
00:14:07,764 --> 00:14:09,641
好,聽起來不錯,很好

286
00:14:09,725 --> 00:14:12,227
喂,占美,你要落力扮餌

287
00:14:12,311 --> 00:14:13,979
令後衛上當,就像這樣

288
00:14:14,062 --> 00:14:15,606
波...傳波給我!

289
00:14:15,689 --> 00:14:18,525
傳波給我...我要波...

290
00:14:18,609 --> 00:14:19,610
就像表演一樣

291
00:14:19,693 --> 00:14:21,945
我想你下年在年度卓越運動獎贏得奧斯卡

292
00:14:22,029 --> 00:14:23,363
你想我扮餌?

293
00:14:23,447 --> 00:14:24,406
對,沒錯

294
00:14:24,489 --> 00:14:25,449
真是個笑話

295
00:14:25,949 --> 00:14:28,452
但可惜的是,沒有人覺得好笑

296
00:14:28,535 --> 00:14:29,536
真的嗎?

297
00:14:29,912 --> 00:14:32,164
大家意見不一,我覺得很好笑

298
00:14:32,247 --> 00:14:33,540
比《爛兄爛弟》更好笑

299
00:14:33,624 --> 00:14:34,499
是個好評

300
00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:36,793
上下格床倒塌那一幕...

301
00:14:37,211 --> 00:14:39,463
我以前覺得那是最好笑的事

302
00:14:39,546 --> 00:14:40,547
但發現這個才是最好笑的

303
00:14:40,631 --> 00:14:42,633
令我要重新想想

304
00:14:42,716 --> 00:14:43,842
最好笑事件的排名

305
00:14:43,926 --> 00:14:47,221
就我而言,這是運動與藝術結合的成果

306
00:14:47,304 --> 00:14:49,097
好,各位再來一次,開始

307
00:14:49,181 --> 00:14:50,182
加油

308
00:14:51,475 --> 00:14:53,185
好,他們懂了...

309
00:14:53,268 --> 00:14:55,395
很有趣的戰術,乜都得
是你想出來的嗎?

310
00:14:55,479 --> 00:14:56,480
不...

311
00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:58,732
都是徫大尼敦的功勞

312
00:14:59,358 --> 00:15:00,484
誰是“徫大尼敦”?

313
00:15:01,443 --> 00:15:02,444
就是他

314
00:15:03,153 --> 00:15:05,781
有人在這裡放狗,也發現狗屎

315
00:15:06,323 --> 00:15:07,324
好

316
00:15:08,116 --> 00:15:09,993
“徫大尼敦”是做甚麼的?

317
00:15:10,494 --> 00:15:11,912
我也不知道他的職位是甚麼

318
00:15:11,995 --> 00:15:13,580
喂,教練,尼敦的職位是甚麼?

319
00:15:13,664 --> 00:15:15,415
-打雜
-對了,打雜

320
00:15:16,542 --> 00:15:19,461
你是說你聽說一個打雜

321
00:15:19,545 --> 00:15:20,504
來制定英超聯球隊的進攻方式?

322
00:15:20,587 --> 00:15:23,131
他比我更懂足球

323
00:15:23,215 --> 00:15:25,342
可能他是個天才

324
00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:26,677
有甚麼補充嗎,教練?

325
00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:27,761
他很好

326
00:15:29,346 --> 00:15:30,347
天啊

327
00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:32,224
如果你熟識鬍鬚教練
你便知道這有多重要

328
00:15:32,307 --> 00:15:33,433
你是這個意思,對嗎?

329
00:15:35,060 --> 00:15:36,562
你有故事寫了

330
00:15:36,645 --> 00:15:39,648
標題是“會點頭的男人”

331
00:15:39,731 --> 00:15:40,858
小心,蓋塔雷斯

332
00:15:40,941 --> 00:15:44,987
由特倫特格林撰寫的新資料

333
00:15:45,070 --> 00:15:46,446
落力點!

334
00:15:47,281 --> 00:15:48,365
要讓他們知道,教練!

335
00:15:50,784 --> 00:15:51,785
來吧

336
00:15:52,995 --> 00:15:53,996
拿條毛巾

337
00:15:54,079 --> 00:15:55,998
-天啊,不...
-拿條毛巾

338
00:15:56,081 --> 00:15:59,042
-放手,拜託停手,天啊
-喂...

339
00:15:59,126 --> 00:16:00,627
你們在搞甚麼鬼?

340
00:16:01,420 --> 00:16:03,046
占美沒叫你們放過他嗎?

341
00:16:07,176 --> 00:16:08,844
有冇搞錯

342
00:16:17,978 --> 00:16:20,105
-看來你忘了點甚麼
-嗨,琪麗

343
00:16:20,189 --> 00:16:22,941
我在找你的爛男友,你真會選人,對嗎?

344
00:16:23,025 --> 00:16:26,820
你前任不是偷了你的勞力士
賣錢來買毒品嗎?

345
00:16:26,904 --> 00:16:29,489
所以?我不需要電話和手錶

346
00:16:30,282 --> 00:16:32,868
看,我沒責任照顧你男友,明白嗎?

347
00:16:32,951 --> 00:16:35,787
但新領隊讓我覺得我有責任

348
00:16:35,871 --> 00:16:39,374
保護尼敦,但我連他姓甚麼都不知道

349
00:16:39,458 --> 00:16:40,626
巴恩斯

350
00:16:40,709 --> 00:16:41,752
不,是雪萊

351
00:16:41,835 --> 00:16:42,836
對,我知道

352
00:16:42,920 --> 00:16:44,213
我不喜歡別人戲弄我

353
00:16:44,296 --> 00:16:48,133
不是你,也不是那個美國佬

354
00:16:48,217 --> 00:16:51,136
我叫乜都得,來自堪薩斯

355
00:16:53,514 --> 00:16:56,183
你扮人真的很差

356
00:16:56,266 --> 00:17:01,230
我知道他是刺激我,但我不會被他操控

357
00:17:01,313 --> 00:17:04,316
算了吧,我馬上便可以刺激到你

358
00:17:04,398 --> 00:17:06,276
-不,你不能,琪麗...
-我覺得我可以

359
00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:08,529
-你不能,琪麗...不
-甚麼?我聽不到你說甚麼

360
00:17:08,612 --> 00:17:10,739
-琪麗,聽我說...
-我在聽

361
00:17:10,821 --> 00:17:12,074
-讓我告訴你為甚麼...
-說吧

362
00:17:13,032 --> 00:17:14,701
我令你生氣了嗎?

363
00:17:17,579 --> 00:17:18,579
不

364
00:17:21,708 --> 00:17:26,088
“我是羅伊肯特,受薪踢波

365
00:17:26,171 --> 00:17:28,423
但我任何時間都會生氣”

366
00:17:34,179 --> 00:17:35,430
扮得很好

367
00:17:43,814 --> 00:17:45,065
喂,特倫特

368
00:17:45,148 --> 00:17:47,401
-你知道你讓我想起誰嗎?
-不,是誰?

369
00:17:47,484 --> 00:17:48,986
其中一款機械人吸麈機

370
00:17:49,987 --> 00:17:51,822
到處走來走去找垃圾

371
00:17:51,905 --> 00:17:53,574
-吸塵機械人
-對了

372
00:17:54,283 --> 00:17:55,826
其實我有個問題

373
00:17:55,909 --> 00:17:57,870
自從你大敗水晶宮後

374
00:17:57,953 --> 00:18:00,706
其中一個球員說更衣室辦了個派對

375
00:18:00,789 --> 00:18:03,834
你覺得落敗後開派對是個正確的做法嗎?

376
00:18:04,960 --> 00:18:08,380
特倫特,我從不看重勝負

377
00:18:08,463 --> 00:18:10,507
我應該會引用這句話

378
00:18:10,591 --> 00:18:11,592
你要走了

379
00:18:12,217 --> 00:18:13,886
喂,你去告訴羅伊我們準備出去好嗎?

380
00:18:13,969 --> 00:18:15,220
-收到
-謝謝,教練

381
00:18:15,304 --> 00:18:18,473
你想一起來嗎?我們去跟學生見面

382
00:18:18,557 --> 00:18:20,058
真巧合

383
00:18:20,142 --> 00:18:23,270
訪問當天剛好去探訪本地學校

384
00:18:23,353 --> 00:18:25,731
這就是巧合的有趣之處,不是嗎?

385
00:18:26,523 --> 00:18:27,816
有時候就是這樣

386
00:18:28,734 --> 00:18:29,902
來吧

387
00:18:31,737 --> 00:18:32,571
入來

388
00:18:32,654 --> 00:18:35,991
我只想過來答謝你阻止那張照片流出

389
00:18:36,575 --> 00:18:37,826
我買了禮物給你

390
00:18:42,289 --> 00:18:43,415
這讓我想起你

391
00:18:44,374 --> 00:18:45,918
強悍硬朗

392
00:18:49,254 --> 00:18:51,089
我決定了不再怕你

393
00:18:51,715 --> 00:18:52,841
我不知道你以前怕我

394
00:18:52,925 --> 00:18:54,885
對,我怕死你了

395
00:18:54,968 --> 00:18:57,679
天啊,如果記者亂寫我們的關係

396
00:18:57,763 --> 00:19:00,057
占美會氣瘋

397
00:19:01,099 --> 00:19:03,477
我不知道為甚麼我會告訴你
但你都知道的,不是嗎?

398
00:19:03,560 --> 00:19:05,062
記得你離婚時的情況嗎?

399
00:19:05,562 --> 00:19:06,688
記得

400
00:19:06,772 --> 00:19:08,690
當記者追訪你和魯伯特時

401
00:19:08,774 --> 00:19:10,442
沒有讓你很生氣嗎?

402
00:19:10,526 --> 00:19:13,153
因為他才是出軌的人,又扮好好先生

403
00:19:13,237 --> 00:19:15,531
激死我

404
00:19:16,448 --> 00:19:18,909
記者永遠不會寫衰男人

405
00:19:19,451 --> 00:19:22,621
沒有人會付錢買那張離婚後一星期

406
00:19:22,704 --> 00:19:23,914
他便在馬略卡島一艘遊艇上裸體的照片

407
00:19:23,997 --> 00:19:26,250
畫面真特別

408
00:19:26,333 --> 00:19:28,961
天啊,即是你在遊艇上的裸體照

409
00:19:29,044 --> 00:19:30,003
我可以看嗎?你有照片嗎?

410
00:19:30,087 --> 00:19:33,340
別這樣,你不想別人看就不會說出來

411
00:19:33,882 --> 00:19:34,883
拜託你

412
00:19:37,010 --> 00:19:40,389
我在曬太陽時,記者坐直昇機拍的

413
00:19:42,057 --> 00:19:44,142
天啊,莉碧嘉

414
00:19:44,685 --> 00:19:46,061
那真是你的胸嗎?

415
00:19:46,144 --> 00:19:48,522
就像個小男孩,我被吸引著了

416
00:19:48,605 --> 00:19:50,357
你怎會這樣的?

417
00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:51,525
遺傳自我媽的

418
00:19:51,608 --> 00:19:53,360
我不能相信你阻止這張照片流出

419
00:19:53,443 --> 00:19:54,736
要是我,我會給所有人看

420
00:19:54,820 --> 00:19:57,656
對,我真的要工作了

421
00:19:58,490 --> 00:19:59,783
對不起,對

422
00:20:00,242 --> 00:20:01,243
謝謝

423
00:20:04,913 --> 00:20:05,956
再見

424
00:20:06,707 --> 00:20:07,708
你的鞋

425
00:20:08,542 --> 00:20:10,252
鞋子,對

426
00:20:11,712 --> 00:20:13,213
你的乳房

427
00:20:13,297 --> 00:20:15,257
真的讓我很嘆為觀止,莉碧嘉

428
00:20:30,522 --> 00:20:32,858
當我第一次看到我們的足球隊時

429
00:20:33,609 --> 00:20:36,820
我不覺得列治文小學隊能勝出任何比賽

430
00:20:37,404 --> 00:20:39,781
更不要說聯賽冠軍

431
00:20:48,665 --> 00:20:53,212
為了慶祝一番
請歡迎列治文球隊的新領隊

432
00:20:53,295 --> 00:20:54,796
“物”都得教練

433
00:20:57,299 --> 00:20:58,800
謝謝你

434
00:20:58,884 --> 00:21:01,220
好,大家好嗎?

435
00:21:02,179 --> 00:21:04,014
-笨蛋
-雅各

436
00:21:05,766 --> 00:21:06,850
沒關係

437
00:21:07,476 --> 00:21:08,810
我只想來這裡

438
00:21:08,894 --> 00:21:11,021
恭喜你們這一季勇奪冠軍

439
00:21:11,104 --> 00:21:14,274
但我知道有人很想跟你們見面

440
00:21:14,358 --> 00:21:15,943
所以我想請你們熱列歡迎

441
00:21:16,026 --> 00:21:19,863
列治文球隊隊長,羅伊肯特

442
00:21:22,407 --> 00:21:25,244
羅伊...

443
00:21:25,786 --> 00:21:26,787
好

444
00:21:27,496 --> 00:21:32,084
我從沒在公開場合或學校演講

445
00:21:32,793 --> 00:21:34,586
總覺得在浪費時間

446
00:21:39,007 --> 00:21:41,260
為甚麼不走出這個沉悶的禮堂

447
00:21:41,343 --> 00:21:43,470
到球場上好好踢波?

448
00:21:56,066 --> 00:21:57,818
我覺得你這樣做很好

449
00:21:57,901 --> 00:21:59,945
只是因為我衰鬼侄女在這裡上學

450
00:22:00,028 --> 00:22:02,614
-是嗎?她是誰?
-那個笨蛋

451
00:22:06,285 --> 00:22:07,536
天啊,她過來了

452
00:22:08,287 --> 00:22:09,621
我們來頂頭鎚好嗎,羅伊叔叔?

453
00:22:09,705 --> 00:22:10,998
好,來吧

454
00:22:12,124 --> 00:22:13,792
好,大家過來排隊

455
00:22:13,876 --> 00:22:15,752
頂頭鎚,很好

456
00:22:15,836 --> 00:22:17,546
下一個,來,完美

457
00:22:17,629 --> 00:22:19,173
下一個,頂

458
00:22:19,840 --> 00:22:20,841
下一個

459
00:22:23,385 --> 00:22:24,803
很好,下一個

460
00:22:28,223 --> 00:22:30,559
下一個,好

461
00:22:30,976 --> 00:22:32,060
很好,我喜歡

462
00:22:33,937 --> 00:22:35,189
-好
-羅伊,來吧

463
00:22:35,272 --> 00:22:37,065
你去排隊,示範一次給他們看
我來拋球

464
00:22:37,149 --> 00:22:38,442
你好嗎?準備好嗎?開始

465
00:22:38,525 --> 00:22:40,027
很好,來吧

466
00:22:40,110 --> 00:22:42,237
來吧,菲比,拿出你的本事

467
00:22:42,321 --> 00:22:44,281
接得好,我們找到個守門員了

468
00:22:45,240 --> 00:22:47,284
天啊,剛好打中鼻

469
00:22:48,785 --> 00:22:49,620
很好,菲比

470
00:22:54,791 --> 00:22:56,418
天啊

471
00:22:56,502 --> 00:22:57,920
有滴血,對不起

472
00:22:59,421 --> 00:23:00,422
給你的

473
00:23:00,506 --> 00:23:01,757
不要扮我

474
00:23:01,840 --> 00:23:04,051
很高興認識你,好好保重

475
00:23:05,260 --> 00:23:07,763
你們是留下來最長時間的人

476
00:23:07,846 --> 00:23:09,598
-喂,謝謝你邀請我們
-謝謝

477
00:23:09,681 --> 00:23:10,682
謝謝你

478
00:23:12,017 --> 00:23:13,185
羅伊,做得很好

479
00:23:13,268 --> 00:23:15,729
我要說你的侄女真可愛

480
00:23:15,812 --> 00:23:19,900
夠了,我受夠了你操控我
又送我甚麼爛禮物

481
00:23:19,983 --> 00:23:22,402
《時間的皺摺》是甚麼鬼?

482
00:23:22,486 --> 00:23:24,112
是本精彩小說

483
00:23:24,196 --> 00:23:27,241
是本講述一個小女孩在太空遊歷時

484
00:23:27,324 --> 00:23:28,659
不知如何領導他人的故事

485
00:23:29,618 --> 00:23:30,619
對,就是這樣

486
00:23:32,204 --> 00:23:33,789
我就是那個小女孩嗎?

487
00:23:34,331 --> 00:23:35,415
我希望你是

488
00:23:36,375 --> 00:23:38,168
對,那也不重要

489
00:23:38,252 --> 00:23:40,379
因為我只是在所有人做的事

490
00:23:40,462 --> 00:23:42,381
倒數你離開之日

491
00:23:42,464 --> 00:23:44,466
特倫特,你是個大煩人,一向都是

492
00:23:46,260 --> 00:23:47,511
菲比,來吧

493
00:23:53,600 --> 00:23:54,601
你餓嗎?

494
00:23:56,019 --> 00:23:57,020
小傳統

495
00:23:59,481 --> 00:24:01,066
隨便吃吧

496
00:24:01,525 --> 00:24:02,734
乜都得?

497
00:24:02,818 --> 00:24:05,195
-喂,奧利
-嘩,你在這裡做甚麼?

498
00:24:05,279 --> 00:24:06,738
你邀請我來的,記得嗎?

499
00:24:06,822 --> 00:24:08,824
誰坐過我的車,我都會邀請他

500
00:24:08,907 --> 00:24:11,368
奧利,這是我的朋友,特倫特

501
00:24:11,451 --> 00:24:13,495
-特倫特,我朋友奧利
-很高興認識你

502
00:24:13,579 --> 00:24:15,789
恭喜,你們都認識了個好人

503
00:24:16,331 --> 00:24:18,041
好了,你們想吃甚麼?

504
00:24:18,625 --> 00:24:20,502
主廚推薦甚麼便甚麼吧

505
00:24:20,586 --> 00:24:24,047
主廚就是我外父,有點點辣可以嗎?

506
00:24:24,131 --> 00:24:26,466
讓他煮東西給我們吃
就像我們是家庭的一份子

507
00:24:27,050 --> 00:24:28,135
你真勇敢

508
00:24:31,138 --> 00:24:33,015
我尊敬你

509
00:24:33,098 --> 00:24:35,267
那或許不是最聰明的選擇

510
00:24:36,727 --> 00:24:37,978
來了

511
00:24:38,896 --> 00:24:40,147
-請吃
-等不及了

512
00:24:40,230 --> 00:24:42,316
香氣濃郁

513
00:24:42,399 --> 00:24:44,943
-你會喜歡的
-謝謝

514
00:24:45,027 --> 00:24:47,738
我沒法想像堪薩斯會有出色的印度餐廳

515
00:24:47,821 --> 00:24:50,365
我不知道該怎樣吃,我從沒吃過印度菜

516
00:25:02,127 --> 00:25:03,712
嘩...真的很辣

517
00:25:03,795 --> 00:25:06,840
天啊,我要噴火了

518
00:25:08,842 --> 00:25:09,927
我覺得我吃不了

519
00:25:10,802 --> 00:25:13,013
甚麼?不...別這樣,我們要把菜吃掉

520
00:25:13,096 --> 00:25:15,390
否則就會令奧利在家人面前丟臉

521
00:25:15,933 --> 00:25:19,061
-不,我真的不行
-別這樣,放到我碟上吧

522
00:25:21,021 --> 00:25:22,648
好...

523
00:25:22,731 --> 00:25:25,317
如果你那麼喜歡堪薩斯,你為甚麼...

524
00:25:26,109 --> 00:25:30,197
你為甚麼要遠赴異地執教一隊...
其實你懂足球嗎?

525
00:25:30,280 --> 00:25:31,281
單純因為錢嗎?

526
00:25:31,865 --> 00:25:33,575
等等,我應該有人工的嗎?

527
00:25:33,659 --> 00:25:34,826
好吃嗎?

528
00:25:35,285 --> 00:25:37,120
告訴你外父,很美味

529
00:25:37,663 --> 00:25:39,081
爸!他說很美味

530
00:25:41,041 --> 00:25:43,794
乜都得,你這樣做很不負責任

531
00:25:44,253 --> 00:25:46,255
這個球會其實對這個城鎮有一些的意義

532
00:25:46,839 --> 00:25:47,881
我知道

533
00:25:47,965 --> 00:25:48,966
我明白

534
00:25:49,591 --> 00:25:51,134
特倫特,你喜歡甚麼?

535
00:25:53,220 --> 00:25:54,221
寫作?

536
00:25:55,389 --> 00:25:56,223
-對
-好

537
00:25:56,306 --> 00:25:57,808
好,因為你真的很擅長

538
00:25:58,225 --> 00:25:59,434
-謝謝
-不用客氣

539
00:25:59,518 --> 00:26:01,436
我?我喜歡做教練

540
00:26:02,020 --> 00:26:03,146
我要再說一次

541
00:26:03,230 --> 00:26:05,774
這樣你才不會覺得我第一次說時
只是說錯

542
00:26:05,858 --> 00:26:08,026
對我而言,成功不在於成敗

543
00:26:08,610 --> 00:26:11,280
而是幫助球員成為最好的自己

544
00:26:11,363 --> 00:26:12,364
場內場外亦然

545
00:26:12,865 --> 00:26:14,283
這並不簡單,特倫特

546
00:26:14,366 --> 00:26:18,036
成長過程中要有人信任你也不簡單

547
00:26:19,705 --> 00:26:20,831
我來問你

548
00:26:21,874 --> 00:26:23,542
我的舌頭還在嘴裡嗎?

549
00:26:23,625 --> 00:26:26,044
因為我快被辣得出幻覺了

550
00:26:29,047 --> 00:26:30,048
我真的要走了

551
00:26:31,175 --> 00:26:33,552
-要趕稿
-對,你有工作在身

552
00:26:33,635 --> 00:26:34,887
喂,但我要跟你說

553
00:26:34,970 --> 00:26:37,139
我真的很享受跟你共處的時間,特倫特

554
00:26:38,265 --> 00:26:39,474
你是真心的,對嗎?

555
00:26:39,892 --> 00:26:40,893
是

556
00:26:41,894 --> 00:26:42,811
好

557
00:26:44,188 --> 00:26:45,564
-謝謝
-不用客氣

558
00:26:46,106 --> 00:26:46,940
你還好嗎?

559
00:26:48,025 --> 00:26:50,027
一般來說一碟便足夠

560
00:26:50,110 --> 00:26:52,779
但我知道美國人能吃很多,對嗎?

561
00:26:53,405 --> 00:26:54,406
來吧

562
00:26:55,449 --> 00:26:56,575
試試那碟

563
00:27:03,373 --> 00:27:06,126
-好味嗎?
-不只好味,還很辣

564
00:27:08,837 --> 00:27:10,881
“維殊太太的聲音很勇敢

565
00:27:11,673 --> 00:27:13,175
'你懂了甚麼?

566
00:27:14,051 --> 00:27:15,469
那一定是我

567
00:27:16,303 --> 00:27:17,763
不會是其他人'”

568
00:27:22,267 --> 00:27:23,352
頂!

569
00:27:24,144 --> 00:27:26,146
那是個粗口,羅伊叔叔

570
00:27:26,230 --> 00:27:27,898
別多管閒事,菲比

571
00:27:32,277 --> 00:27:33,278
乖

572
00:27:35,322 --> 00:27:38,158
(死肥仔)

573
00:27:40,786 --> 00:27:43,997
-如何?
-我收到報導的預先版本

574
00:27:45,582 --> 00:27:48,627
-讀給我聽
-標題“反覆無常的乜都得”

575
00:27:49,336 --> 00:27:52,422
“如果你試想像乜都得是個足球教練

576
00:27:52,506 --> 00:27:56,218
我可以肯定,你很難接受這個事實”

577
00:27:56,301 --> 00:27:59,012
-喂,你好嗎?
-很好,你的鼻子如何,教練?

578
00:27:59,096 --> 00:28:01,265
-很好,多謝關心
-“但你一定要接受

579
00:28:01,348 --> 00:28:04,059
因為乜都得就在這個社區

580
00:28:04,142 --> 00:28:07,855
勇敢或說是愚昧地接受別人批評”

581
00:28:07,938 --> 00:28:10,023
-喂,你們好嗎?
-“視乎你怎樣想”

582
00:28:10,107 --> 00:28:11,859
死開,怪人!

583
00:28:13,819 --> 00:28:15,404
-嗨
-嗨

584
00:28:15,487 --> 00:28:17,030
-夠了
-你每次都是這樣

585
00:28:17,114 --> 00:28:19,408
“的確他毫無準備

586
00:28:19,491 --> 00:28:23,704
他重覆了兩次他不在乎列治文的成敗

587
00:28:23,787 --> 00:28:28,250
但如果他的方式都不行
很難有另一個可行的方法”

588
00:28:30,794 --> 00:28:32,129
為甚麼你不讀下去?

589
00:28:33,297 --> 00:28:37,176
請記得這不是我說的,是特倫特格林寫的

590
00:28:38,051 --> 00:28:39,052
繼續

591
00:28:40,262 --> 00:28:42,514
-“這個行業的人常常自吹自擂
-...常常自吹自擂

592
00:28:42,598 --> 00:28:43,974
-乜都得謙厚內歛”
-乜都得謙厚內歛

593
00:28:44,057 --> 00:28:48,478
他的操練方式很內歛,不會一針見血

594
00:28:48,562 --> 00:28:51,607
嗨,羅伊,我不知道這是個退休派對

595
00:28:53,817 --> 00:28:54,818
大件事了!

596
00:28:55,319 --> 00:28:56,570
不要再欺負尼敦!

597
00:28:57,321 --> 00:28:58,780
我不知道我打了誰

598
00:28:58,864 --> 00:29:00,240
因為我在黑暗地方不再看得很清楚

599
00:29:00,324 --> 00:29:01,366
但我是對你們全部人說了!

600
00:29:02,159 --> 00:29:05,996
他慢慢地發揮作用
直至你沒法忽視他的存在

601
00:29:06,914 --> 00:29:08,081
雲呢拿伏特加

602
00:29:09,291 --> 00:29:10,292
小朋友先會飲

603
00:29:12,669 --> 00:29:13,795
琪麗

604
00:29:13,879 --> 00:29:14,880
羅伊

605
00:29:15,506 --> 00:29:18,342
不論是為追隨者變成領袖

606
00:29:20,093 --> 00:29:23,305
還是努力吃下

607
00:29:23,388 --> 00:29:26,558
他腸胃根本受不住的火辣食物以示尊重

608
00:29:26,642 --> 00:29:27,935
鎖匙...

609
00:29:28,018 --> 00:29:30,020
好,有了,天啊...

610
00:29:30,103 --> 00:29:32,773
雖然我相信乜都得最終也會失敗

611
00:29:32,856 --> 00:29:35,901
列治文將無法保級,落得尷尬下場

612
00:29:37,027 --> 00:29:38,862
當這一切發生時,我不會幸災樂禍

613
00:29:40,030 --> 00:29:42,074
因為我會支持他

614
00:29:43,700 --> 00:29:45,327
有冇搞錯!

615
00:30:14,898 --> 00:30:16,900
(字幕翻譯: 賴芷晴)