1
00:00:06,507 --> 00:00:10,177
你聽到列治文球隊被主場球迷喝倒彩

2
00:00:10,260 --> 00:00:13,472
不是沒有原因的

3
00:00:13,972 --> 00:00:15,807
二比零,我們可以做得更好的!

4
00:00:16,683 --> 00:00:20,187
占美...對不起
我沒有把球傳到你想要的位置

5
00:00:21,104 --> 00:00:22,105
不要緊

6
00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:24,691
如果我給你一些建議

7
00:00:24,775 --> 00:00:26,735
或能改善你的球技,這樣會太直接嗎?

8
00:00:26,818 --> 00:00:27,819
不會,請說

9
00:00:27,903 --> 00:00:31,281
你要的是個時光機

10
00:00:31,365 --> 00:00:34,493
回到你媽媽跟一個沒有體育細胞的男人
上床的時候

11
00:00:34,576 --> 00:00:39,248
把她帶走,跟她飛到阿根廷
讓她跟馬勒當拿上床

12
00:00:41,124 --> 00:00:42,334
希望這能幫到你

13
00:00:43,252 --> 00:00:44,503
好,夠了

14
00:00:45,212 --> 00:00:47,005
我受夠了你不斷侮辱別人

15
00:00:48,423 --> 00:00:53,512
我們來打一場吧

16
00:00:56,557 --> 00:00:57,558
離曬譜,來吧

17
00:00:58,016 --> 00:00:59,268
搞錯...

18
00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:01,770
喂...

19
00:01:03,647 --> 00:01:05,274
冷靜點!

20
00:01:05,357 --> 00:01:07,359
教練,跟他們說我的打鬥球會
第一條規則

21
00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:10,320
-不能打架!
-不能打架,好嗎?明白嗎?

22
00:01:11,029 --> 00:01:14,199
看在皮特馬拉維奇份上
我們還有下半場要踢

23
00:01:14,283 --> 00:01:16,118
請各位坐下

24
00:01:18,579 --> 00:01:20,080
教練救了你一命,老鬼

25
00:01:24,209 --> 00:01:25,586
你試試再叫我一次...

26
00:01:26,879 --> 00:01:27,880
老鬼

27
00:01:32,050 --> 00:01:33,051
對不起...

28
00:01:34,678 --> 00:01:35,888
老爺爺

29
00:01:35,971 --> 00:01:37,681
我要殺死你!

30
00:01:57,242 --> 00:01:59,578
《乜都得教練》

31
00:02:00,871 --> 00:02:06,335
四號檯排好了,現在來處理悶人檯

32
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:08,419
我會坐在這一檯

33
00:02:10,672 --> 00:02:13,759
我還未安排伊萊恩肯納的座位
這個壞女人

34
00:02:13,842 --> 00:02:17,262
她今晚不會出席,她被自己的馬踢中臉

35
00:02:17,346 --> 00:02:19,431
真可憐,她的馬沒事嗎?

36
00:02:23,352 --> 00:02:25,854
看來我們的球隊分裂了

37
00:02:26,522 --> 00:02:28,273
教練,你知道我在想甚麼嗎?

38
00:02:28,357 --> 00:02:30,734
-《夢斷城西》?
-你知道的,是鯊魚幫和噴射幫

39
00:02:30,817 --> 00:02:31,818
你覺得他們在健身室比舞

40
00:02:31,902 --> 00:02:34,696
能解決問題嗎?

41
00:02:34,780 --> 00:02:36,406
當然,我記得

42
00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:40,035
里夫和貝納多在那一幕被刀刺死

43
00:02:40,118 --> 00:02:42,329
不,他們是因為之後的打鬥而死的

44
00:02:42,412 --> 00:02:43,497
對...

45
00:02:43,580 --> 00:02:45,582
我15歲的時候在研讀安妮塔

46
00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:47,876
我讀男校

47
00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:51,713
我們又知道尼敦更多往事了

48
00:02:52,130 --> 00:02:53,674
鬍鬚教練!

49
00:02:54,466 --> 00:02:58,804
今晚晚餐,你只能選雞肉或牛扒!

50
00:02:58,887 --> 00:03:00,347
不能兩樣都選!

51
00:03:00,848 --> 00:03:01,974
好!

52
00:03:02,057 --> 00:03:03,475
被捉到了

53
00:03:03,559 --> 00:03:04,685
乜都得!

54
00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:09,314
-是!
-我要知道你出席的伴侶!

55
00:03:09,398 --> 00:03:12,192
那就是選二個主菜的男士

56
00:03:12,276 --> 00:03:14,945
不,他帶了人來參加!

57
00:03:18,073 --> 00:03:19,324
喂,你今晚有空嗎?

58
00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:21,910
-我每晚都有空
-好

59
00:03:21,994 --> 00:03:24,121
-我帶尼敦!
-誰?

60
00:03:24,496 --> 00:03:26,623
徫大尼敦!他會是我的伴侶!

61
00:03:26,707 --> 00:03:29,585
我們想坐在八號檯吃,原因很簡單

62
00:03:30,294 --> 00:03:31,295
不!

63
00:03:31,879 --> 00:03:33,463
鬍鬚教練,你會吃雞肉!

64
00:03:37,509 --> 00:03:38,510
嗨,老闆

65
00:03:38,594 --> 00:03:40,637
星期五睡衣日嗎?我早點知道就好了

66
00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:42,639
你會喜歡這個故事的

67
00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:44,933
-當我17歲時...
-乜都得,在你說有關睡衣的

68
00:03:45,017 --> 00:03:47,394
陳年往事前,我要打斷你

69
00:03:47,477 --> 00:03:49,313
好,如果你改變主意就跟我說

70
00:03:49,396 --> 00:03:51,190
因為這個故事很有趣

71
00:03:51,773 --> 00:03:53,859
不好意思,我有甚麼幫到你嗎?
因為我真的...

72
00:03:53,942 --> 00:03:56,987
我想問羅伊、占美和我今晚
會否坐在同一檯?

73
00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:58,071
-可以嗎?
-可以

74
00:03:58,155 --> 00:04:00,949
很好!因為我要做中間人
我想這是個好機會

75
00:04:01,033 --> 00:04:02,951
-乜都得,我說可以了
-對

76
00:04:03,785 --> 00:04:06,121
天啊,這條真好看,但是...

77
00:04:07,456 --> 00:04:09,374
但我想我穿起來不美了

78
00:04:09,458 --> 00:04:11,376
你當然很美,穿衣最講求自信

79
00:04:11,460 --> 00:04:14,421
如果我沒有自信
我就不會穿睡衣出席畢業舞會

80
00:04:14,505 --> 00:04:15,881
結果那晚在監獄渡過

81
00:04:15,964 --> 00:04:17,841
但如果你不想聽這個故事,我便不會說

82
00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:19,176
你知道嗎?我不會再煩你了

83
00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:21,803
你一定因為這個舞會而很緊張,對嗎?

84
00:04:21,887 --> 00:04:23,305
不...我沒有

85
00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:26,141
即使當時我和魯伯特一起舉辦這個舞會

86
00:04:26,225 --> 00:04:28,060
大部份工作都是由我來辦的

87
00:04:28,143 --> 00:04:29,603
所以我絕不緊張

88
00:04:29,686 --> 00:04:32,564
我其實感到很自在

89
00:04:32,648 --> 00:04:34,858
下午好,我們有個大問題

90
00:04:34,942 --> 00:04:37,819
我們的演唱嘉賓羅比威廉斯不出席舞會了

91
00:04:37,903 --> 00:04:38,904
天啊!

92
00:04:38,987 --> 00:04:40,113
不,他是誰?

93
00:04:40,197 --> 00:04:44,952
不...沒有事,沒有問題,讓我來想想

94
00:04:45,035 --> 00:04:47,204
好,我們要這樣做,希堅斯

95
00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:50,374
今晚當我跟大家說羅比威廉斯不來了

96
00:04:50,457 --> 00:04:54,086
都不會有問題
因為你會找到更出色的人選

97
00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:56,171
-對了
-對

98
00:04:56,255 --> 00:05:00,092
我是個世界級解決問題高手

99
00:05:00,175 --> 00:05:03,554
對了,拿穩!好!

100
00:05:04,555 --> 00:05:06,139
你可以的,希堅斯!

101
00:05:06,223 --> 00:05:08,183
莉碧嘉會很欣賞你辛勤工作的表現!

102
00:05:08,267 --> 00:05:09,268
謝謝,乜都得!

103
00:05:16,984 --> 00:05:18,485
不,我不喜歡,寶貝

104
00:05:18,569 --> 00:05:21,780
不是我的風格,沒有帽子和拉鍊

105
00:05:25,409 --> 00:05:26,493
沒有塗鴉圖案

106
00:05:27,077 --> 00:05:29,037
癡線,我像個銀行家

107
00:05:29,121 --> 00:05:31,582
銀行家不會穿緊得包著弟弟的褲子

108
00:05:31,665 --> 00:05:34,293
好,我像有大鵰的銀行家

109
00:05:34,376 --> 00:05:36,461
如果有這種人存在,我們不會在一起

110
00:05:38,422 --> 00:05:39,423
是吧

111
00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:40,841
好的

112
00:05:40,924 --> 00:05:44,720
當你開始接觸高級時尚
就會有更多廣告邀約

113
00:05:44,803 --> 00:05:46,555
我只是嘗試替你建立你的品牌

114
00:05:47,681 --> 00:05:49,391
占美,不,你在做甚麼?

115
00:05:49,474 --> 00:05:50,684
我在...

116
00:05:51,852 --> 00:05:52,895
更改造型

117
00:05:53,770 --> 00:05:57,149
人們不知道,但我很了解時裝

118
00:05:57,232 --> 00:05:59,610
-是嗎?
-對,我就像個後裔

119
00:05:59,985 --> 00:06:01,028
是嗎?

120
00:06:01,820 --> 00:06:03,322
喂,去下面

121
00:06:05,490 --> 00:06:07,242
真乖,去找禮物

122
00:06:09,828 --> 00:06:11,163
喂,甜心

123
00:06:11,246 --> 00:06:14,374
天啊,我真希望能跟你通電話
我收到你的訊息

124
00:06:14,458 --> 00:06:17,461
打電話時對方總沒法接聽
今次輪到你了

125
00:06:18,337 --> 00:06:19,713
喂,你知道嗎

126
00:06:19,796 --> 00:06:21,965
我在穿你叫我帶過來的那套西裝

127
00:06:22,049 --> 00:06:23,926
你總是對的

128
00:06:25,177 --> 00:06:29,515
好,先這樣,我愛...我想念你

129
00:06:29,598 --> 00:06:32,142
去替我攬攬乖仔

130
00:06:32,226 --> 00:06:33,644
晚點再跟你說,拜拜

131
00:06:35,771 --> 00:06:37,397
喂

132
00:06:37,481 --> 00:06:39,149
真喜歡遊唱詩人

133
00:06:39,233 --> 00:06:40,317
給你

134
00:06:41,985 --> 00:06:43,946
天啊,看看你

135
00:06:44,029 --> 00:06:45,489
-希望我沒有太早到
-沒有

136
00:06:45,572 --> 00:06:47,366
或者太遲,我嘗試在兩者之間出現

137
00:06:47,449 --> 00:06:49,284
不,你來得剛好,尼敦

138
00:06:49,368 --> 00:06:50,536
-好
-對,做得很好

139
00:06:51,119 --> 00:06:52,788
喂,我來問你

140
00:06:52,871 --> 00:06:55,207
如果朋友告訴你

141
00:06:55,290 --> 00:06:58,210
-你牙縫有東西,你會介意嗎?
-不介意

142
00:06:58,293 --> 00:07:01,046
好,因為這套西裝完全不適合你

143
00:07:01,129 --> 00:07:02,965
-真的嗎?
-對

144
00:07:03,048 --> 00:07:05,759
我想去買一套,但太貴了

145
00:07:05,843 --> 00:07:07,678
-我想借我爸的就好了
-明白

146
00:07:08,262 --> 00:07:10,430
喂,我們先去一個地方,跟我來

147
00:07:10,514 --> 00:07:11,348
好

148
00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:16,728
(列治文劇院)

149
00:07:16,812 --> 00:07:18,063
你在看甚麼?

150
00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:22,442
你們好嗎?我的西裝好看嗎?不錯嗎?

151
00:07:22,526 --> 00:07:23,735
真好

152
00:07:23,819 --> 00:07:26,488
謝謝你們替我拍照

153
00:07:26,572 --> 00:07:27,573
你們叫甚麼名?

154
00:07:28,907 --> 00:07:31,243
你是傑瑞,你是戴夫

155
00:07:31,326 --> 00:07:33,203
你們來都是想拍我

156
00:07:33,287 --> 00:07:35,706
挑左邊眉,挑右邊眉

157
00:07:36,331 --> 00:07:37,541
迷惑樣

158
00:07:39,126 --> 00:07:41,128
好,拍一張你們真正會用到的

159
00:07:41,211 --> 00:07:42,588
很好,親一個?

160
00:07:44,047 --> 00:07:45,591
(第十屆貧困兒童慈善晚會)

161
00:07:47,843 --> 00:07:50,053
-浪漫永不死
-兩位,不好意思...我...

162
00:07:50,137 --> 00:07:51,763
-想讓他們拍張照
-好...

163
00:07:51,847 --> 00:07:53,265
我要走到中間,好

164
00:07:53,891 --> 00:07:55,726
莉碧嘉,看這邊!

165
00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:57,853
-很好,兩位女士
-莉碧嘉,這邊!

166
00:07:57,936 --> 00:07:59,771
-你真美
-望向左邊

167
00:07:59,855 --> 00:08:00,939
我真討厭這環節

168
00:08:01,023 --> 00:08:02,816
-維爾頓小姐
-很好...

169
00:08:03,317 --> 00:08:04,318
喂

170
00:08:04,776 --> 00:08:06,737
交叉腳站,明白嗎?

171
00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:09,781
把手放在臀部,抓著似的

172
00:08:10,324 --> 00:08:11,533
這樣最好看

173
00:08:12,701 --> 00:08:14,453
-莉碧嘉,笑一下
-莉碧嘉!

174
00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:20,292
看看她,太美了!

175
00:08:34,222 --> 00:08:36,183
不要大搖大擺,西裝本來就好看了

176
00:08:41,813 --> 00:08:44,024
乜都得,天啊

177
00:08:44,107 --> 00:08:45,234
你也很美,老闆

178
00:08:45,317 --> 00:08:47,319
我直覺也想你會選這條裙

179
00:08:47,402 --> 00:08:49,321
容我說,你穿起來真明艷照人

180
00:08:49,821 --> 00:08:50,822
謝謝

181
00:08:50,906 --> 00:08:53,283
看看尼敦,他也很帥,對吧?

182
00:08:53,367 --> 00:08:54,493
很高興再次跟你見面

183
00:08:54,576 --> 00:08:56,370
-很高興認識你
-很高興認識你

184
00:08:57,579 --> 00:08:59,998
-我先失陪
-沒問題,你去辦事吧

185
00:09:02,167 --> 00:09:03,502
看,鬍鬚教練在那裡

186
00:09:03,919 --> 00:09:05,420
那是他的新女朋友,珍

187
00:09:05,921 --> 00:09:08,340
對,他們在星期五晚棋藝會認識的

188
00:09:08,423 --> 00:09:10,425
很明顯他們很喜歡彼此的下棋法

189
00:09:12,970 --> 00:09:13,971
那不是個笑話

190
00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:15,055
不是嗎?

191
00:09:15,556 --> 00:09:16,557
我以為是

192
00:09:17,432 --> 00:09:21,562
不...死開...不...

193
00:09:22,521 --> 00:09:23,522
我知道

194
00:09:27,109 --> 00:09:29,444
這真令人不自在

195
00:09:29,528 --> 00:09:32,656
-我要換檯
-不...喂,回來

196
00:09:32,739 --> 00:09:33,782
是我的意思

197
00:09:33,866 --> 00:09:36,076
是我把你們放在同一檯的,坐下來

198
00:09:38,662 --> 00:09:41,832
聽好,你兩個大哥令隊員分成兩派

199
00:09:41,915 --> 00:09:43,458
說到更衣室

200
00:09:43,542 --> 00:09:45,544
我想它就像我媽的泳衣一樣

201
00:09:45,627 --> 00:09:47,421
我想是件連身泳衣,明白嗎?

202
00:09:47,504 --> 00:09:48,714
我們來解決這個問題

203
00:09:48,797 --> 00:09:50,799
告訴我你們最不滿意對方的事,開始

204
00:09:50,883 --> 00:09:52,050
他是個大壞蛋

205
00:09:52,134 --> 00:09:54,803
如果他有腦,我就不會激怒他

206
00:09:54,887 --> 00:09:57,222
你不用跟隊友成為最好的朋友

207
00:09:57,306 --> 00:10:00,392
想想奧尼爾和高比,對嗎?
連儂和麥卡尼

208
00:10:00,475 --> 00:10:02,686
即使胡迪和巴斯
在膠公仔體內也不喜歡對方

209
00:10:02,769 --> 00:10:03,937
胡迪不是由布製成的嗎?

210
00:10:04,021 --> 00:10:06,106
謝謝你,但現在不是討論的時候

211
00:10:06,773 --> 00:10:08,984
知道這些厲害二人組有甚麼共通點嗎?

212
00:10:09,067 --> 00:10:10,152
互相尊重

213
00:10:10,777 --> 00:10:13,864
你們會找到共通點的,誰想先開始?

214
00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:15,199
我先說

215
00:10:16,074 --> 00:10:20,204
尼敦,你的西裝很好看
你看起來很有型

216
00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:24,458
謝謝,這是我擁有的第二套西裝

217
00:10:24,541 --> 00:10:27,586
第一套是我還是個光脫脫寶寶時穿的

218
00:10:31,215 --> 00:10:33,133
對不起,乜都得說時很有趣,我...

219
00:10:33,217 --> 00:10:34,551
你應該說

220
00:10:34,635 --> 00:10:36,678
-“生時一無所有”這個字
-天啊,對

221
00:10:36,762 --> 00:10:39,348
好,再來吧,好嗎?
占美,你想說嗎?

222
00:10:39,431 --> 00:10:40,682
不要

223
00:10:41,850 --> 00:10:43,393
-羅伊
-他是個大壞蛋

224
00:10:43,477 --> 00:10:45,521
你要繼續這樣說,對嗎?好

225
00:10:45,604 --> 00:10:47,981
我有一個想法,要不成功
要不就會造成更多磨擦

226
00:10:48,065 --> 00:10:49,191
誰想喝一杯?

227
00:10:54,655 --> 00:10:56,156
演唱嘉賓方面有甚麼進展?

228
00:10:56,240 --> 00:10:57,783
我跟幾個經理人溝通過

229
00:10:57,866 --> 00:11:01,828
列出一張無法出席的名單

230
00:11:01,912 --> 00:11:03,747
正在篩選,在處理中

231
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,168
你在這裡

232
00:11:09,586 --> 00:11:11,046
你在彩排你的演講,對嗎?

233
00:11:11,755 --> 00:11:15,384
魯伯特向公眾演講這部份做得很好

234
00:11:15,467 --> 00:11:16,885
有個小貼士

235
00:11:16,969 --> 00:11:20,430
在演講開始時,自嘲一下

236
00:11:20,514 --> 00:11:21,515
人們喜歡的

237
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:24,393
好,我應該自嘲甚麼?

238
00:11:26,061 --> 00:11:27,521
對...

239
00:11:30,732 --> 00:11:35,153
你知道...說甚麼...不,好吧

240
00:11:35,237 --> 00:11:37,239
你不想說出來,是嗎?乜都得

241
00:11:37,322 --> 00:11:39,491
不,小姐,不...好吧

242
00:11:40,951 --> 00:11:42,160
祝你好運

243
00:11:44,037 --> 00:11:46,665
你知道嗎?我想到了,不...

244
00:11:47,457 --> 00:11:49,209
女王向前行四步

245
00:11:50,085 --> 00:11:52,337
等等,你們沒有棋盤也能捉棋?

246
00:11:53,547 --> 00:11:56,008
對不起打擾你們,是我錯
對不起,請繼續

247
00:11:57,634 --> 00:11:59,052
騎士移近國王五步

248
00:12:04,600 --> 00:12:05,767
晚安

249
00:12:05,851 --> 00:12:10,647
歡迎來到第十屆貧困兒童慈善晚會

250
00:12:11,064 --> 00:12:15,611
如果我要擁抱你們一下
以作感謝你們的捐款,那麼...

251
00:12:16,528 --> 00:12:19,573
我應該不會,因為我不太喜歡擁抱

252
00:12:21,658 --> 00:12:25,829
我希望你們有帶支票簿來參與
一會兒舉行的拍賣會

253
00:12:25,913 --> 00:12:31,835
因為你們可以投得列治文的球員

254
00:12:34,296 --> 00:12:39,801
規則照舊,不能手淫
除非球員簽了豁免書

255
00:12:41,470 --> 00:12:42,471
魯伯特?

256
00:12:43,847 --> 00:12:44,890
你好,親愛的

257
00:12:44,973 --> 00:12:47,809
真是...令人又驚又喜

258
00:12:48,727 --> 00:12:49,895
你不是在等我來嗎?

259
00:12:51,396 --> 00:12:53,148
因為你回覆你不會出席

260
00:12:53,232 --> 00:12:56,485
這是當一無事處的富豪的好處之一

261
00:12:56,568 --> 00:12:59,780
有時候我晚上突然有空

262
00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:02,824
我可以嗎?謝謝

263
00:13:03,575 --> 00:13:09,373
先生女士,有你們的幫助
我們去年籌得80萬英鎊

264
00:13:11,542 --> 00:13:14,294
希望今年能籌得更多

265
00:13:14,378 --> 00:13:18,507
我知道我不請自來,但我真的很想幫手

266
00:13:18,590 --> 00:13:21,301
我誠心希望你能讓我出席

267
00:13:21,385 --> 00:13:22,386
當然

268
00:13:23,136 --> 00:13:24,888
讓他坐在悶人檯吧

269
00:13:25,556 --> 00:13:26,807
說笑而已

270
00:13:27,349 --> 00:13:29,601
四號檯,魯伯特曼尼恩

271
00:13:37,067 --> 00:13:38,151
謝謝,美人

272
00:13:44,199 --> 00:13:45,534
天啊

273
00:13:46,535 --> 00:13:47,870
-謝謝
-那...

274
00:13:49,538 --> 00:13:51,415
尼敦...過來

275
00:13:51,498 --> 00:13:53,458
看,這是套新西裝

276
00:13:53,542 --> 00:13:56,211
今晚不要戲弄我
明天讓你們戲弄兩次好嗎?

277
00:13:56,295 --> 00:13:57,838
羅伊說我們不能再戲弄你

278
00:13:57,921 --> 00:14:00,757
他大力用頭撞我,我有一半時間仍會頭暈

279
00:14:00,841 --> 00:14:02,467
醫生叫我不要喝酒

280
00:14:07,014 --> 00:14:08,682
天啊

281
00:14:08,765 --> 00:14:10,475
另一個襯衫存在的理由

282
00:14:10,559 --> 00:14:13,478
閉嘴,不好笑,我燙到乳頭了

283
00:14:14,146 --> 00:14:16,273
我希望我能變成那冰塊

284
00:14:17,816 --> 00:14:20,152
我會投你跟我共渡一晚

285
00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:22,362
謝謝

286
00:14:22,446 --> 00:14:25,991
一次約會,不是一整晚,所以...

287
00:14:26,074 --> 00:14:27,326
即管看看吧

288
00:14:28,577 --> 00:14:29,745
我之前做過

289
00:14:29,828 --> 00:14:32,623
如果她投超過3000,你要跟她上床

290
00:14:34,249 --> 00:14:36,543
-真的嗎?
-你不用完事

291
00:14:37,336 --> 00:14:38,879
做到一半就好

292
00:14:39,630 --> 00:14:40,797
用手

293
00:14:45,052 --> 00:14:46,720
離哂大譜

294
00:14:47,346 --> 00:14:49,056
占美,開玩笑而已

295
00:14:49,431 --> 00:14:51,767
開玩笑而已,占美

296
00:14:53,477 --> 00:14:54,603
發生甚麼事?

297
00:14:55,771 --> 00:14:59,107
一如既往,占美是個不守規則的小混蛋

298
00:15:00,901 --> 00:15:02,444
羅伊,我來問你

299
00:15:02,528 --> 00:15:04,154
你23歲時是怎樣的?

300
00:15:04,696 --> 00:15:06,657
在聯賽踢波,賺大錢

301
00:15:08,033 --> 00:15:10,285
-不守規則的小混蛋
-對

302
00:15:10,911 --> 00:15:13,830
你知道人們會說
“青春浪費在年少輕狂之時”?

303
00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:18,669
我會說不要浪費你身上的歷練智慧

304
00:15:20,087 --> 00:15:21,129
乜都得?

305
00:15:23,465 --> 00:15:26,218
我剛想到的,我覺得很不錯

306
00:15:32,599 --> 00:15:35,060
謝謝你跟哥連和艾石說

307
00:15:35,143 --> 00:15:36,770
你為甚麼要那麼貼近我?

308
00:15:36,854 --> 00:15:39,940
我原來想抱你一下,但我現在不敢

309
00:15:40,774 --> 00:15:41,775
好

310
00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:47,531
-好,夠了
-好

311
00:15:50,367 --> 00:15:52,911
乜都得,我想跟你介紹魯伯特曼尼恩

312
00:15:52,995 --> 00:15:55,539
-曼尼恩先生,你好嗎?
-叫我魯伯特就好了,乜都得

313
00:15:55,622 --> 00:15:58,250
尤是你是帶領我球會的人

314
00:15:59,293 --> 00:16:00,502
你以前的球會

315
00:16:00,586 --> 00:16:04,089
當然...但...我的球會長存在我心

316
00:16:04,882 --> 00:16:06,800
熱愛一隊球隊是一生一世的

317
00:16:06,884 --> 00:16:07,718
-對
-對

318
00:16:07,801 --> 00:16:09,553
就像你好朋友的姐姐,對嗎?

319
00:16:09,928 --> 00:16:10,929
幫我一個忙

320
00:16:11,013 --> 00:16:13,724
如果你去到堪薩斯
遇到一個叫湯迪寧的人

321
00:16:13,807 --> 00:16:15,017
不要跟他說是我說的

322
00:16:17,019 --> 00:16:18,770
我喜歡

323
00:16:19,646 --> 00:16:22,065
但我不喜歡你過去兩場敗仗

324
00:16:22,149 --> 00:16:23,400
-表現很差
-對

325
00:16:23,483 --> 00:16:24,776
我忍不住說出來,真希望我沒有說出來

326
00:16:24,860 --> 00:16:27,696
不要緊,誰會知道?
可能我們能勝出比賽,對嗎?

327
00:16:28,405 --> 00:16:31,116
天啊,我相信你

328
00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:32,284
你相信他嗎?

329
00:16:35,662 --> 00:16:37,998
如果你說不,今晚就慘了

330
00:16:38,999 --> 00:16:40,250
我當然信任你,乜都得

331
00:16:41,210 --> 00:16:42,961
他正是我們需要的人才

332
00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:46,381
不要喝太多香檳

333
00:16:46,465 --> 00:16:48,509
要為拍賣會保持頭腦清醒

334
00:16:49,635 --> 00:16:50,802
你為何不主持拍賣會?

335
00:16:51,512 --> 00:16:53,305
不,我不會,今晚是你主場

336
00:16:53,388 --> 00:16:55,557
我們都知道人們想見到你

337
00:16:56,350 --> 00:16:59,144
而且,這是為了...兒童

338
00:16:59,853 --> 00:17:01,063
為兒童

339
00:17:04,107 --> 00:17:06,609
好,我先失陪,我要跟其他賓客聊天

340
00:17:07,027 --> 00:17:08,694
我要說我很喜歡這條裙

341
00:17:10,196 --> 00:17:11,323
很年輕

342
00:17:12,156 --> 00:17:14,660
你能如此明艷照人再出現真好

343
00:17:15,743 --> 00:17:16,744
謝謝

344
00:17:19,122 --> 00:17:20,123
失陪

345
00:17:20,874 --> 00:17:21,916
乜都得

346
00:17:22,334 --> 00:17:24,545
這年她真不好過,她還好嗎?

347
00:17:24,627 --> 00:17:25,587
她很好

348
00:17:26,255 --> 00:17:29,591
有很多人幫助籌備這個活動

349
00:17:30,342 --> 00:17:34,012
然後...羅比威廉斯不前來表演...

350
00:17:34,096 --> 00:17:35,097
-羅比?
-對

351
00:17:35,180 --> 00:17:36,932
他是我的老友

352
00:17:37,015 --> 00:17:39,852
我可以發短訊給他,他一定會來

353
00:17:40,227 --> 00:17:41,854
我相信她會高興

354
00:17:42,437 --> 00:17:45,232
我去找她,得她允許,好嗎?

355
00:17:45,983 --> 00:17:47,818
不好意思,在美國我們會這樣說

356
00:17:47,901 --> 00:17:50,863
-即是我去問她意見的意思
-很好,去吧

357
00:17:50,946 --> 00:17:52,155
好,去吧

358
00:17:52,781 --> 00:17:55,534
可以要烈一點的酒嗎?威士忌加冰?

359
00:17:55,617 --> 00:17:58,370
二份加一份,三份

360
00:17:59,872 --> 00:18:03,000
先生女士,計劃有少許改變

361
00:18:03,083 --> 00:18:07,171
我被騙了來主持今晚的拍賣會

362
00:18:09,464 --> 00:18:13,427
第一個受害者是占美塔特

363
00:18:17,055 --> 00:18:18,390
寶貝,你要投得我

364
00:18:18,473 --> 00:18:20,517
我不能投自己的男朋友,太可憐了

365
00:18:20,601 --> 00:18:22,519
2020年了,女人做甚麼都可以

366
00:18:22,603 --> 00:18:25,105
不,我不會的,你很性感,上台吧!

367
00:18:25,189 --> 00:18:29,693
看看他,年輕帥氣的小傢伴

368
00:18:29,776 --> 00:18:32,654
底價為5000鎊

369
00:18:32,738 --> 00:18:34,323
我要他,魯伯特

370
00:18:35,115 --> 00:18:37,618
謝麗爾巴納比出價5000

371
00:18:37,701 --> 00:18:40,329
列治文設德蘭矮種馬的優秀繁殖家

372
00:18:40,412 --> 00:18:42,164
有人出價6000嗎?

373
00:18:45,292 --> 00:18:46,752
6000,謝謝

374
00:18:46,835 --> 00:18:49,838
-7000
-7000

375
00:18:53,133 --> 00:18:54,551
很好

376
00:18:54,635 --> 00:18:57,679
競標者和投標者都很好

377
00:18:57,763 --> 00:19:00,015
我不覺得

378
00:19:01,099 --> 00:19:03,018
-12000英鎊
-14000

379
00:19:03,101 --> 00:19:04,603
14000!

380
00:19:07,481 --> 00:19:10,317
18000,還有更高價嗎?

381
00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:12,277
有,25000

382
00:19:12,361 --> 00:19:17,366
25000!一次,兩次

383
00:19:17,449 --> 00:19:19,201
由琪麗鍾斯投得

384
00:19:19,284 --> 00:19:24,206
要用25000英鎊投男朋友回來
為甚麼要免費跟他相處呢?

385
00:19:24,706 --> 00:19:25,707
你欠我的

386
00:19:29,711 --> 00:19:33,173
喂,你在這裡
出來呼吸一些新鮮空氣,對嗎?

387
00:19:33,257 --> 00:19:37,511
對,那些人力車真好笑
但看來很有趣

388
00:19:37,594 --> 00:19:38,428
對

389
00:19:38,512 --> 00:19:40,222
-你坐過嗎?
-沒有

390
00:19:40,305 --> 00:19:44,810
我和太太以前渡假時租過二人單車

391
00:19:44,893 --> 00:19:48,188
不是很好的經驗
她跌斷手,我...

392
00:19:48,272 --> 00:19:51,775
一隻牙齒崩了,撞傷下陰

393
00:19:54,194 --> 00:19:56,446
-你沒事嗎?
-只是...

394
00:19:57,906 --> 00:19:59,116
那個男人,他了解我

395
00:20:00,367 --> 00:20:04,204
我以前覺得他坦率的作風很珍貴
但事實上不是

396
00:20:04,288 --> 00:20:05,289
但這是...

397
00:20:07,583 --> 00:20:10,294
隱藏他缺乏安全感最殘忍的方法

398
00:20:11,461 --> 00:20:13,922
他會叫我穿甚麼,吃甚麼

399
00:20:16,758 --> 00:20:18,302
我就會言聽計從

400
00:20:19,511 --> 00:20:20,888
但現在我單獨一人

401
00:20:22,556 --> 00:20:25,934
剩下我一人,乜都得
他說過如果我走了,我就會孤獨一人

402
00:20:30,272 --> 00:20:31,690
我不想孤獨一人

403
00:20:36,528 --> 00:20:39,323
喂,沒事的,好了

404
00:20:52,836 --> 00:20:56,715
你想坐上去離開嗎?來吧

405
00:20:56,798 --> 00:20:57,925
我也想

406
00:20:59,218 --> 00:21:00,844
現在不能,但也謝謝你

407
00:21:04,973 --> 00:21:07,184
他開始拍賣會了嗎?

408
00:21:07,643 --> 00:21:08,644
開始了

409
00:21:08,727 --> 00:21:11,647
好,由他來主持真好
我們能籌得更多善款

410
00:21:12,940 --> 00:21:15,067
不管他做甚麼,人們都喜歡他

411
00:21:18,278 --> 00:21:21,031
-你想回去嗎?
-不,你先回去吧

412
00:21:21,698 --> 00:21:22,699
我要補補妝

413
00:21:22,783 --> 00:21:26,745
我應該看來像羅伯特史密斯
小睡起來的樣子

414
00:21:27,412 --> 00:21:30,123
他情感豐富,對

415
00:21:30,207 --> 00:21:31,375
好,場內見

416
00:21:43,303 --> 00:21:44,304
當我初踏入聯賽

417
00:21:44,388 --> 00:21:46,807
隊中有個老鬼叫道格斯塔維克

418
00:21:46,890 --> 00:21:48,976
他時常針對我,我們大家都很討厭對方

419
00:21:49,601 --> 00:21:51,728
-你知道我們怎樣贏得聯賽冠軍的嗎?
-不

420
00:21:52,396 --> 00:21:54,731
跟那個美國佬做的一樣

421
00:21:54,815 --> 00:21:57,109
他叫我坐下並說“我們來處理一下

422
00:21:57,192 --> 00:22:00,070
告訴我你討厭我的原因,我也告訴你”

423
00:22:02,406 --> 00:22:04,324
-你是個垃圾...
-不,我先說

424
00:22:05,742 --> 00:22:08,871
即使我知道我該傳球給你...

425
00:22:10,038 --> 00:22:11,874
但你很自私又自大

426
00:22:11,957 --> 00:22:14,084
每次傳球給你,我都想嘔

427
00:22:16,587 --> 00:22:20,257
小時候我房間牆內有你的海報

428
00:22:21,758 --> 00:22:23,594
我以前很喜歡看你比賽

429
00:22:25,721 --> 00:22:28,348
但你已經不是以前的你

430
00:22:28,432 --> 00:22:30,684
只是因為你贏了幾個冠軍

431
00:22:30,767 --> 00:22:33,854
你就大搖大擺想別人討好你

432
00:22:36,815 --> 00:22:39,193
對,我是這樣的

433
00:22:45,699 --> 00:22:47,618
現在你要承認我說的指控

434
00:22:48,368 --> 00:22:49,369
我不想

435
00:22:51,997 --> 00:22:53,207
即使只是...

436
00:22:54,666 --> 00:22:55,751
說對了一點點

437
00:23:01,215 --> 00:23:03,300
你和道格最後有成為朋友嗎?

438
00:23:03,383 --> 00:23:05,427
當然沒有,我希望他死了

439
00:23:07,638 --> 00:23:08,764
敬你去死

440
00:23:11,225 --> 00:23:12,434
衰仔

441
00:23:15,646 --> 00:23:16,897
你好嗎,教練

442
00:23:18,607 --> 00:23:21,777
你問了莉碧嘉要不要我
傳短訊給羅比了嗎?

443
00:23:22,361 --> 00:23:25,781
我找不到她,不用擔心了

444
00:23:25,864 --> 00:23:28,450
如果你改變主意
說一句我馬上發短訊給他

445
00:23:28,534 --> 00:23:30,869
他馬上會過來,再要一杯

446
00:23:31,578 --> 00:23:33,705
魯伯特,我想到一些事

447
00:23:33,789 --> 00:23:37,251
如果你可以發訊息叫
羅比威廉斯今晚過來...

448
00:23:38,794 --> 00:23:42,172
你或許能輕易地叫他不要來

449
00:23:44,508 --> 00:23:47,427
那我便是個大壞蛋,不是嗎?

450
00:23:53,767 --> 00:23:57,688
乜都得,你覺得莉碧嘉知道
愛黛兒真人是怎樣的嗎?

451
00:23:58,897 --> 00:24:01,149
我要展開個小冒險,需要個副駕駛

452
00:24:01,233 --> 00:24:03,861
-你想我陪你去?
-對,其他人不能,我要最佳人選

453
00:24:03,944 --> 00:24:05,153
來,跟我來

454
00:24:10,826 --> 00:24:13,120
-對了,謝謝你
-甚麼?

455
00:24:13,537 --> 00:24:17,624
紅地毯的照片已經發佈到網上

456
00:24:17,708 --> 00:24:21,336
終於把我拍得好看了

457
00:24:21,420 --> 00:24:22,921
很高興能幫到你

458
00:24:26,592 --> 00:24:27,634
琪麗?

459
00:24:27,718 --> 00:24:28,719
我想你應該知道

460
00:24:28,802 --> 00:24:32,639
另一個投標占美的年輕女仔
是他的另一個女朋友

461
00:24:34,850 --> 00:24:36,435
小賤人

462
00:24:39,897 --> 00:24:42,399
-我可以喝一口你的酒嗎?
-可以

463
00:24:42,482 --> 00:24:43,609
謝謝

464
00:24:44,693 --> 00:24:46,528
還有我討厭橄欖

465
00:24:46,612 --> 00:24:50,824
我覺得這粒小橙色陰蒂很奇怪

466
00:24:53,911 --> 00:24:55,287
你有試過跟足球員拍拖嗎?

467
00:24:56,371 --> 00:24:58,373
-甚麼?
-對不起

468
00:24:58,957 --> 00:25:02,252
我不應該笑的,聽起來...很壞

469
00:25:02,336 --> 00:25:04,463
不,沒事的,只是有點壞

470
00:25:04,546 --> 00:25:07,549
我18歲時跟一個23歲足球員拍拖

471
00:25:09,301 --> 00:25:13,013
我快30歲了,仍然跟一個23歲足球員拍拖

472
00:25:14,306 --> 00:25:15,974
我是里安納度狄卡比奧

473
00:25:17,851 --> 00:25:19,019
但他們很有趣

474
00:25:20,103 --> 00:25:22,523
為人簡單,有錢,體型健碩

475
00:25:22,606 --> 00:25:24,316
會承認過錯嗎?

476
00:25:25,025 --> 00:25:26,026
甚麼意思?

477
00:25:26,610 --> 00:25:29,780
所有人都會犯錯,但...

478
00:25:31,657 --> 00:25:34,284
我嫁給一個男人12年了

479
00:25:34,993 --> 00:25:38,539
他從來沒有承認過一次過錯

480
00:25:48,006 --> 00:25:49,174
嗨

481
00:25:49,258 --> 00:25:50,259
-嗨
-我是琪麗

482
00:25:50,342 --> 00:25:51,343
嗨,我是貝絲

483
00:25:51,426 --> 00:25:53,220
-很高興認識你,貝絲
-很高興認識你

484
00:25:53,303 --> 00:25:55,389
你介意我跟他獨處一下嗎?

485
00:25:55,472 --> 00:25:58,225
當然沒問題,很高興認識你

486
00:25:59,768 --> 00:26:01,061
她是你的新女友?

487
00:26:01,144 --> 00:26:04,773
冷靜點,這也是建立個人品牌的一部份
不是嗎?

488
00:26:04,857 --> 00:26:07,776
如果有兩個女人投我,我會看來更有價值

489
00:26:07,860 --> 00:26:08,944
你明白我的意思嗎?

490
00:26:09,778 --> 00:26:10,988
我很聰明,是嗎?

491
00:26:11,697 --> 00:26:17,452
現在輪到唯一前聯賽冠軍得主
歡迎羅伊肯特

492
00:26:17,536 --> 00:26:18,579
老爺爺

493
00:26:21,081 --> 00:26:26,336
最高金額得主可以跟他在時髦泳池酒店
共渡一天

494
00:26:26,420 --> 00:26:29,965
喝著德貴麗酒,曬曬日光浴...

495
00:26:30,048 --> 00:26:32,259
不,不喝德貴麗酒,不曬日光浴

496
00:26:34,094 --> 00:26:37,306
也沒有泳池,我們不會離開SW14區

497
00:26:37,389 --> 00:26:40,058
你看來很妒忌,真有趣

498
00:26:40,142 --> 00:26:42,019
你覺得妒忌很有趣嗎?

499
00:26:42,102 --> 00:26:43,604
我不知道,我不會妒忌

500
00:26:43,687 --> 00:26:47,065
這個沉悶的約會有人會出價100鎊嗎?

501
00:26:47,524 --> 00:26:48,859
好,1000鎊

502
00:26:50,319 --> 00:26:53,739
-有人出更高價嗎?
-2000鎊!

503
00:26:54,865 --> 00:26:57,075
激發了謝麗爾心中的火了

504
00:26:57,159 --> 00:27:00,078
-3000鎊
-你在令自己很尷尬

505
00:27:00,704 --> 00:27:02,623
4000鎊!

506
00:27:02,706 --> 00:27:03,790
5000鎊!

507
00:27:04,541 --> 00:27:06,835
6000鎊

508
00:27:06,919 --> 00:27:08,879
-有更高出價嗎?
-對不起...

509
00:27:10,088 --> 00:27:12,049
好,由謝麗爾投得

510
00:27:19,723 --> 00:27:24,728
拍賣會完美結束,除了還有個小驚喜

511
00:27:25,604 --> 00:27:31,527
我私人捐出100萬鎊

512
00:27:34,154 --> 00:27:35,155
謝謝

513
00:27:35,656 --> 00:27:37,449
謝謝...

514
00:27:37,533 --> 00:27:43,705
我相信這超出了莉碧嘉預期的80萬鎊
謝謝

515
00:27:47,459 --> 00:27:48,794
為了兒童,對嗎?

516
00:28:00,556 --> 00:28:01,640
莉碧嘉

517
00:28:01,723 --> 00:28:05,644
他是凱姆科爾,一個未被發掘的潛力巨星

518
00:28:05,727 --> 00:28:07,187
去吧,凱姆,讓我們看看你的本事

519
00:28:11,441 --> 00:28:12,442
你瘋了嗎?

520
00:28:12,526 --> 00:28:16,488
莉碧嘉,不要以貌取人,好嗎?

521
00:28:17,865 --> 00:28:18,866
隨便你

522
00:28:20,617 --> 00:28:21,618
對

523
00:28:22,911 --> 00:28:27,916
大家好,先生女士,我很遺憾要告訴你...

524
00:28:29,209 --> 00:28:33,297
羅比威廉斯因為突發事所以今晚沒法前來

525
00:28:33,380 --> 00:28:38,218
但我們找來出色的替代人選
你們一定會喜歡的

526
00:28:38,302 --> 00:28:41,180
至少回家路上可以繼續討論

527
00:28:41,972 --> 00:28:47,603
他遠道而來...請歡迎凱姆乜乜

528
00:28:54,818 --> 00:28:56,111
搞錯

529
00:28:57,696 --> 00:28:58,697
那是甚麼意思?

530
00:29:12,961 --> 00:29:18,592
大自然...請原諒我們的過錯

531
00:29:21,553 --> 00:29:23,889
我們先不下棋,去跳舞好嗎?

532
00:29:24,598 --> 00:29:26,683
女王向國王行五步,將軍

533
00:29:33,815 --> 00:29:36,777
我們已經傷害了大自然

534
00:29:36,860 --> 00:29:40,072
她憤怒了

535
00:30:02,970 --> 00:30:06,014
因為我是個乖仔

536
00:30:09,101 --> 00:30:13,814
但是

537
00:30:13,897 --> 00:30:19,027
我有些壞兄弟

538
00:30:19,903 --> 00:30:20,904
(凱姆科爾)

539
00:30:27,536 --> 00:30:29,121
-謝謝你
-不用客氣

540
00:30:29,204 --> 00:30:31,248
-我們玩得很開心
-謝謝

541
00:30:32,291 --> 00:30:33,417
晚安

542
00:30:33,959 --> 00:30:36,670
謝謝你那筆大捐款

543
00:30:36,753 --> 00:30:38,505
-下年再見
-我等不及了

544
00:30:45,470 --> 00:30:46,680
真可愛,對嗎?

545
00:30:47,347 --> 00:30:48,390
真的

546
00:30:51,268 --> 00:30:55,189
你可能覺得
只有自己才看到他真實的一面...

547
00:30:56,690 --> 00:30:57,691
但其實不是

548
00:31:04,823 --> 00:31:06,325
天啊,你還好嗎,老友?

549
00:31:08,410 --> 00:31:10,245
-快走
-好吧

550
00:31:10,329 --> 00:31:11,330
今晚很高興

551
00:31:12,915 --> 00:31:15,125
等等,走慢點,教練

552
00:31:19,171 --> 00:31:20,964
你可以不要再對我生氣了嗎?

553
00:31:24,009 --> 00:31:25,219
對不起,寶貝

554
00:31:27,638 --> 00:31:29,598
你知道自己做錯甚麼嗎,占美?

555
00:31:30,474 --> 00:31:31,600
你常常問我

556
00:31:32,392 --> 00:31:34,520
喂,幫幫我

557
00:31:34,603 --> 00:31:36,605
不要因你們兩人的事擺我上檯

558
00:31:37,564 --> 00:31:38,732
令我覺得自己好像傻仔

559
00:31:41,068 --> 00:31:42,903
對不起,我...

560
00:31:43,445 --> 00:31:44,655
我不應這樣做的

561
00:31:45,906 --> 00:31:46,907
謝謝

562
00:31:47,533 --> 00:31:49,868
沒有人想投你,滾吧

563
00:31:51,411 --> 00:31:52,412
走吧

564
00:31:56,667 --> 00:31:58,210
你為甚麼要跟他道歉?

565
00:31:58,710 --> 00:32:00,712
要為自己的行為負責任,占美

566
00:32:03,674 --> 00:32:04,675
我們完了

567
00:32:06,093 --> 00:32:07,094
再見

568
00:32:10,931 --> 00:32:11,932
好吧

569
00:32:18,438 --> 00:32:20,566
不好意思,我可以拿這瓶嗎?

570
00:32:20,649 --> 00:32:21,650
兩瓶可以嗎?

571
00:32:31,451 --> 00:32:33,120
你想喝個爛醉嗎?

572
00:32:33,537 --> 00:32:36,248
-對,我想
-然後去打劫銀行

573
00:32:43,005 --> 00:32:45,048
米歇爾和亨利下個星期會來

574
00:32:45,132 --> 00:32:46,508
-這很好,教練
-對

575
00:32:47,217 --> 00:32:49,511
來吧,告訴我你和珍的事,怎麼了?

576
00:32:50,095 --> 00:32:51,221
我又是這樣了

577
00:32:51,305 --> 00:32:54,016
-重視下棋多於女友嗎?
-對

578
00:32:54,099 --> 00:32:55,809
你何時才會學懂,教練?

579
00:33:29,134 --> 00:33:31,136
字幕翻譯:賴芷晴