1 00:00:01,877 --> 00:00:04,086 [Arlo] And we're in the final minute of added time. 2 00:00:05,506 --> 00:00:09,218 AFC Richmond and Nottingham Forest are level with two goals apiece. 3 00:00:10,344 --> 00:00:15,182 Obisanya switches play. He finds Rojas, who has room. 4 00:00:15,265 --> 00:00:16,265 Oh! 5 00:00:17,726 --> 00:00:18,894 [whistle blows] 6 00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:20,729 [Arlo] And it's a penalty! 7 00:00:20,812 --> 00:00:21,980 [cheering] 8 00:00:22,064 --> 00:00:25,776 A giant opportunity for the Greyhounds to change their club's tide here. 9 00:00:25,859 --> 00:00:27,110 Nice pass, Sam! 10 00:00:27,653 --> 00:00:28,654 Here we go, Dani! 11 00:00:28,737 --> 00:00:29,905 -Yeah! Yes! -Nice, nice. 12 00:00:29,988 --> 00:00:34,034 [Arlo] Huge relief for Colin Hughes after he was liable for Forest's equalizer. 13 00:00:35,536 --> 00:00:38,413 Richmond has started the season with seven straight ties… 14 00:00:38,497 --> 00:00:40,749 and if this match ends in a draw, they will tie the record, 15 00:00:40,832 --> 00:00:44,586 which is currently a tie between Southampton and Swansea. 16 00:00:44,670 --> 00:00:45,838 Chris, can you even imagine 17 00:00:45,921 --> 00:00:48,590 starting a season with seven consecutive draws? 18 00:00:48,674 --> 00:00:50,133 I sure can, Arlo. 19 00:00:50,217 --> 00:00:53,220 And that's because I'm a right-brained dominant with a knack for make-believe. 20 00:00:55,013 --> 00:00:56,640 Is it okay if I pray? 21 00:00:56,723 --> 00:00:59,643 Yeah, of course. But to which god and in what language, you know? 22 00:00:59,726 --> 00:01:01,144 You could cross your fingers, make a wish. 23 00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:02,229 There you go. 24 00:01:03,856 --> 00:01:06,817 [Arlo] The Richmond faithful, who've recently gone through so much, 25 00:01:06,900 --> 00:01:09,194 still fervently behind their club. 26 00:01:10,153 --> 00:01:11,154 Keep on him. 27 00:01:13,198 --> 00:01:15,242 -Ooh. -Go on. Yeah! 28 00:01:17,369 --> 00:01:19,538 [Arlo] And a hush falls over Nelson Road… 29 00:01:19,621 --> 00:01:21,206 -[dog howling] -[bird wings flapping] 30 00:01:23,041 --> 00:01:25,169 [Arlo] With the exception of Richmond's venerable mascot, 31 00:01:25,252 --> 00:01:28,297 Earl Greyhound, howling his encouragement. 32 00:01:28,839 --> 00:01:29,840 [whistle blows] 33 00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:36,305 Will Dani Rojas deliver the good boy their first win of the season? 34 00:01:36,388 --> 00:01:37,514 Please, please, please, please. 35 00:01:37,598 --> 00:01:38,765 Come on, Dani. 36 00:01:38,849 --> 00:01:40,934 [breathes deeply] 37 00:01:41,560 --> 00:01:43,103 Football is life. 38 00:02:10,088 --> 00:02:11,048 [Earl yelps] 39 00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:12,424 [crowd gasping] Oh! 40 00:02:12,508 --> 00:02:13,509 Oh. 41 00:02:15,385 --> 00:02:17,221 -Oh, no. -Oh, my God. 42 00:02:17,304 --> 00:02:19,223 I promise that's not what I wished for. 43 00:02:19,890 --> 00:02:23,018 [theme music plays] 44 00:02:43,497 --> 00:02:46,792 [sighs] That poor creature. It's so tragic. 45 00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:48,085 Awful turn of events. 46 00:02:48,168 --> 00:02:50,337 You don't think that people will hate us because of it, do you? 47 00:02:50,420 --> 00:02:51,839 Well, it was obviously a horrible accident, 48 00:02:51,922 --> 00:02:54,091 but I guess that one perk of being in a lower division now 49 00:02:54,174 --> 00:02:56,468 is that not every game is televised. 50 00:02:56,552 --> 00:02:58,428 Yes, but, Higgins, the Internet. 51 00:02:58,929 --> 00:03:00,722 -Oh, right, the goddamn Internet. -[sighs] 52 00:03:00,806 --> 00:03:03,016 Oi, Twitter is going bonkers. Look. 53 00:03:04,059 --> 00:03:06,812 Oh, God. Did we really make Michael Jordan cry? 54 00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:08,605 -Did you write a statement for Ted? -Yeah, I did. 55 00:03:08,689 --> 00:03:12,442 But then he said, "Now, don't you fret, Boba Fett." He's got it covered. 56 00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:14,403 -Okay. -Mmm. Mmm. 57 00:03:14,486 --> 00:03:16,238 -[journalists clamoring] Coach! -All right, Marcus, 58 00:03:16,321 --> 00:03:17,698 -what do you got for me? -Coach Lasso, 59 00:03:17,781 --> 00:03:19,992 how are you feeling about the team's efforts today? 60 00:03:20,075 --> 00:03:22,536 Well, I feel like everyone played their hearts out, especially Sam. 61 00:03:22,619 --> 00:03:23,829 Just gets better and better every game. 62 00:03:23,912 --> 00:03:26,957 He's really helping us fill that giant Roy Kent void, you know. 63 00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:29,001 And how many more matches you think can end in a draw 64 00:03:29,084 --> 00:03:30,252 before you hit the panic button? 65 00:03:30,335 --> 00:03:33,297 Well, Marcus, there's two buttons I never like to hit, all right? 66 00:03:33,380 --> 00:03:34,631 And that's "panic" and "snooze." 67 00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:36,175 -Who else? -[journalists clamoring] 68 00:03:36,258 --> 00:03:37,968 Uh, what about this fella right here? 69 00:03:38,635 --> 00:03:41,388 -Trent Crimm-- -[journalists] The Independent. 70 00:03:42,264 --> 00:03:46,435 I was wondering if you had any comments on Earl, the dog Dani Rojas killed today. 71 00:03:47,936 --> 00:03:51,023 Mmm. Trent Crimm, bringing that heat. [chuckles] 72 00:03:53,275 --> 00:03:55,277 [sighs deeply] 73 00:03:55,903 --> 00:03:56,904 Yeah. 74 00:03:58,739 --> 00:04:01,783 Well, when I was three years old, I got attacked by our neighbor's dog. 75 00:04:02,326 --> 00:04:04,912 I don't remember it happening, but my mother said it was pretty-- 76 00:04:04,995 --> 00:04:06,205 pretty scary, you know. 77 00:04:07,372 --> 00:04:10,125 I do remember being afraid of dogs while growing up though. 78 00:04:10,209 --> 00:04:12,669 Like if I was at a friend's house for a sleepover or something, 79 00:04:12,753 --> 00:04:16,173 they'd have to keep their family dog outside, otherwise I'd bawl my eyes out. 80 00:04:16,255 --> 00:04:17,548 -[chuckles] -[journalists chuckle] 81 00:04:18,716 --> 00:04:22,721 Then in high school, our neighbor, Mr. Grady, well, his wife passed away. 82 00:04:23,722 --> 00:04:25,933 And he was real sad about that, as you can imagine, 83 00:04:26,517 --> 00:04:29,520 and he just kinda stopped taking care of their dog. 84 00:04:30,729 --> 00:04:32,898 Same one that bit me. His name was Hank. 85 00:04:36,401 --> 00:04:38,570 And so I started looking after him, you know. 86 00:04:38,654 --> 00:04:41,573 Feeding him, taking him on walks, playing fetch, all that fun stuff. 87 00:04:42,658 --> 00:04:45,327 Eventually, Mr. Grady's son moved his dad into a nursing home, 88 00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:48,247 and he asked if I wanted to keep Hank, and I was like, "Yeah. Heck, yeah." 89 00:04:49,623 --> 00:04:52,292 And then a year or so after that we had to put Hank to sleep. 90 00:04:55,420 --> 00:04:57,589 It's funny to think about the things in your life… 91 00:04:58,507 --> 00:05:02,177 that can make you cry just knowing that they existed, 92 00:05:02,261 --> 00:05:04,054 can then become the same thing that make you cry 93 00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:05,681 knowing that they're now gone. 94 00:05:11,019 --> 00:05:12,855 I think those things come into our lives… 95 00:05:14,231 --> 00:05:16,191 to help us get from one place to a better one. 96 00:05:19,945 --> 00:05:22,281 And I hope we helped Earl do just that. 97 00:05:23,574 --> 00:05:25,784 We gonna miss him around here a whole bunch. Yeah. 98 00:05:31,748 --> 00:05:33,083 And how's Dani doing? 99 00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:34,793 I haven't spoken with him yet, 100 00:05:34,877 --> 00:05:37,462 but I just hope he's not being too hard on himself, you know. 101 00:05:37,546 --> 00:05:40,257 [praying in Spanish] 102 00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:42,176 He's been like this for 20 minutes. 103 00:05:45,637 --> 00:05:47,139 He's gonna use all the hot water. 104 00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:49,558 -Yeah. -Yeah, you're right. 105 00:05:49,641 --> 00:05:51,643 [praying continues] 106 00:06:01,612 --> 00:06:03,655 Hey, Dani. What ya doing? 107 00:06:04,656 --> 00:06:06,283 Washing the death off of me. 108 00:06:14,124 --> 00:06:16,543 Well, I-- I recommend you use a little soap. 109 00:06:17,169 --> 00:06:20,547 Helps get the eternal rest out of those tough-to-reach places, you know. 110 00:06:20,631 --> 00:06:21,882 Gracias, Coach. 111 00:06:23,258 --> 00:06:26,428 Well, hey, don't forget, football is life, right? 112 00:06:29,139 --> 00:06:30,849 I know. It used to be. 113 00:06:32,976 --> 00:06:37,105 -[praying in Spanish] -[mouthing] I got nothing. 114 00:06:44,988 --> 00:06:46,615 Okay, so, fellas, 115 00:06:46,698 --> 00:06:49,284 let's go ahead and give Dani a little bit of space right now, yeah? 116 00:06:49,368 --> 00:06:50,953 Y'all don't mind showering at home, do ya? 117 00:06:51,036 --> 00:06:52,663 Ooh, Coach, uh, if it's okay with you, 118 00:06:52,746 --> 00:06:54,540 some of us prefer to take long baths at home. 119 00:06:54,623 --> 00:06:56,542 [players] Yeah, yeah. 120 00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:58,252 Oh. Yeah, no, okay, that'll work too. 121 00:06:58,335 --> 00:07:00,671 Oh, and hey, way to play out there today. 122 00:07:00,754 --> 00:07:02,381 Y'all kicked their butts from soup to nuts. 123 00:07:02,464 --> 00:07:03,882 Don't worry, we gonna get a W soon. 124 00:07:04,716 --> 00:07:06,176 We'll see you goldfish on Monday. 125 00:07:06,844 --> 00:07:07,845 Goldfish? 126 00:07:07,928 --> 00:07:11,014 Oh, it means to forget our mistakes and failures and just move on. 127 00:07:11,723 --> 00:07:14,560 But I didn't make any mistakes. Only you played poorly. 128 00:07:14,643 --> 00:07:17,229 [players] Ooh. Wow. 129 00:07:17,312 --> 00:07:19,648 Hey, guys, Jan Maas is not being rude. 130 00:07:19,731 --> 00:07:20,732 He's just being Dutch. 131 00:07:21,650 --> 00:07:23,902 -[player 1] Mm? Yeah, yeah. -[player 2] True. 132 00:07:23,986 --> 00:07:26,613 -[cell phone beeps, vibrates] -[sighs] 133 00:07:31,535 --> 00:07:33,704 I'm telling you, all these ties are my fault. 134 00:07:33,787 --> 00:07:36,623 It's straight up celestial payback for the Man City game. 135 00:07:36,707 --> 00:07:39,626 There I was wishing and hoping for a freaking tie, 136 00:07:39,710 --> 00:07:41,295 and now the karma police are making good 137 00:07:41,378 --> 00:07:43,547 on showing me what I get when I mess with them. 138 00:07:43,630 --> 00:07:45,924 The team's playing well, Ted, just a little unlucky, that's all. 139 00:07:46,008 --> 00:07:49,303 "Unlucky." Yeah. Man, I love the way y'all use that word over here. 140 00:07:49,386 --> 00:07:51,805 Back home, if a team was playing poorly, we don't call 'em unlucky. 141 00:07:51,889 --> 00:07:53,932 -What do we call 'em, Coach? -New York Jets. 142 00:07:54,016 --> 00:07:55,642 -There it is. -Hey, Coach. 143 00:07:55,726 --> 00:07:57,978 Uh, sorry to interrupt. Uh, can I leave a little early today? 144 00:07:58,061 --> 00:08:00,480 But part of your job is to stay until the whole team's gone. 145 00:08:00,564 --> 00:08:03,442 No, yes, of course. It's just, it's my mum's 50th birthday-- 146 00:08:03,525 --> 00:08:04,943 Oh. Oh. 147 00:08:05,027 --> 00:08:07,154 And w-what position does your mum play on the team again? 148 00:08:08,530 --> 00:08:11,325 It's okay, Will. Uh, tell your mom a happy birthday from all of us, 149 00:08:11,408 --> 00:08:13,619 and if she ever wants to try out for the team, she's more than welcome. 150 00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:14,912 Ah, lovely. [chuckles] 151 00:08:17,080 --> 00:08:18,707 [sighs] 152 00:08:21,043 --> 00:08:22,294 Y-You gotta stay on 'em. 153 00:08:23,086 --> 00:08:24,755 Pressure makes pearls, right? 154 00:08:25,714 --> 00:08:27,341 -Mmm. -Wait, that's wrong. 155 00:08:27,424 --> 00:08:29,885 It's diamonds-- Shit! I messed it up. 156 00:08:29,968 --> 00:08:31,512 No, you didn't mess it up. You were just, uh-- 157 00:08:31,595 --> 00:08:33,096 -Unlucky. -Yes! 158 00:08:36,058 --> 00:08:37,893 -[cell phone beeps] -Ooh, thanks. 159 00:08:38,519 --> 00:08:39,645 That's odd. 160 00:08:39,727 --> 00:08:43,565 We just received a giant food delivery from our rivals over at Brentford F.C. 161 00:08:43,649 --> 00:08:45,192 That's nice. What kind of food? 162 00:08:45,275 --> 00:08:46,276 Thai. 163 00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:49,112 -Oh, now I get it. -[sighs] 164 00:08:49,196 --> 00:08:50,364 -[knocks] -Howdy, y'all. 165 00:08:50,447 --> 00:08:51,782 [all] Ted! 166 00:08:52,407 --> 00:08:54,660 What do you say to a cocktail, Coach Lasso? 167 00:08:54,743 --> 00:08:56,411 Oh, the same thing I'd say to Diane Sawyer 168 00:08:56,495 --> 00:08:58,413 if she ever asked me out on a date: "Yes, please." 169 00:08:59,164 --> 00:09:02,376 Boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy. Hmm. 170 00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:03,961 How you feeling? 171 00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:05,796 Well, Keeley, I feel like 172 00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:08,215 a bigger loser than the biggest loser from The Biggest Loser. 173 00:09:08,799 --> 00:09:10,759 Oh, look on the bright side, Ted. 174 00:09:10,843 --> 00:09:13,011 We are still undefeated. 175 00:09:13,095 --> 00:09:14,555 Okay, sure. Thank you. 176 00:09:15,097 --> 00:09:16,098 How's Dani doing? 177 00:09:17,432 --> 00:09:19,059 Oh, he's a little shell-shocked, 178 00:09:19,142 --> 00:09:21,103 but Dani's a lot like an expensive tape measure. 179 00:09:21,186 --> 00:09:22,354 He snaps back real quick. 180 00:09:22,437 --> 00:09:23,313 -[Rebecca] Hmm. -Yeah. 181 00:09:23,397 --> 00:09:24,815 What about Earl's owner? He doing all right? 182 00:09:24,898 --> 00:09:26,859 -Yeah, fortunately he is. -Oh, good. 183 00:09:26,942 --> 00:09:29,570 Yes, and you're now looking at the very new, very generous, 184 00:09:29,653 --> 00:09:33,824 very guilt-riddled benefactor of Richmond's largest dog shelter. 185 00:09:34,324 --> 00:09:36,159 -Barkingham Palace. -[Rebecca chuckles] 186 00:09:36,243 --> 00:09:37,870 -Mmm. It's a good name. -[Keeley] Mm-hmm. 187 00:09:38,537 --> 00:09:40,289 -To Earl. -To Earl. 188 00:09:40,372 --> 00:09:41,623 -To Earl. -Mmm. 189 00:09:42,457 --> 00:09:44,001 Okay, I should go. 190 00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:46,753 I promised the boys we'd watch Empire Strikes Back tonight, 191 00:09:46,837 --> 00:09:48,547 and I have to get my thoughts together 192 00:09:48,630 --> 00:09:51,008 for when they ask about Luke and Leia making out. 193 00:09:51,091 --> 00:09:53,135 -Oh, right. -[sighs, sucks teeth] Wish me luck. 194 00:09:53,218 --> 00:09:54,469 Good luck, Higgins. 195 00:09:54,553 --> 00:09:55,596 Bye, Leslie. 196 00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:58,432 -Hey. May the force be with you. -And also with you. 197 00:09:58,515 --> 00:10:00,184 -All right. -[cell phone beeps] 198 00:10:00,267 --> 00:10:02,186 -Oh, my God! -[gasps] Oh, is that him? 199 00:10:02,269 --> 00:10:03,812 -Yes, yes, yes. [squeals] -Come on! Oh, good! 200 00:10:03,896 --> 00:10:04,813 -[squeals] -[chuckles] 201 00:10:04,897 --> 00:10:06,148 [squeals] Okay. 202 00:10:06,231 --> 00:10:07,524 -Hey, him who? -[both] Shh. 203 00:10:08,483 --> 00:10:10,402 -And? -Well, I mean… 204 00:10:10,485 --> 00:10:12,654 -Okay, but? -Oh, no. Totally. 205 00:10:12,738 --> 00:10:14,489 -Good, I'm proud of you. -[giggles] Thanks. 206 00:10:14,573 --> 00:10:15,866 Am I allowed to speak yet? 207 00:10:16,450 --> 00:10:18,744 Oh, sorry, Ted. It's just a little bit of girl talk 208 00:10:18,827 --> 00:10:22,247 about a gentleman suitor I've gone out with a few times. 209 00:10:22,331 --> 00:10:25,083 -[both giggling] -Nice. A little girl talk. I get it. 210 00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:27,002 -What's his name-- -[both] Shh. 211 00:10:28,170 --> 00:10:29,171 -Oh. -[sighs] 212 00:10:30,672 --> 00:10:33,300 Are you guys up for a double date next week? Let him prove his mettle. 213 00:10:33,383 --> 00:10:36,094 -Abso-fucking-lutely. -Can you ask Roy if he's free? 214 00:10:36,178 --> 00:10:37,429 -He's free. Don't worry. -Okay, cool. 215 00:10:37,513 --> 00:10:39,223 H-Hey, did Roy come to the game today? 216 00:10:39,806 --> 00:10:41,433 Oh, no, he didn't. Sorry, Ted. 217 00:10:41,517 --> 00:10:43,894 Oh, no, that's okay. I'm sure he'll swing by at some point, right? 218 00:10:44,561 --> 00:10:47,022 Hey, he knows he's always got a ticket waiting for him at will call, yeah? 219 00:10:47,105 --> 00:10:48,106 -Yeah. -Good, okay. 220 00:10:48,190 --> 00:10:50,859 And don't forget, I don't put it under his name. 221 00:10:50,943 --> 00:10:52,903 I don't want folks messing with him. It's under an alias. 222 00:10:52,986 --> 00:10:56,406 Like, last week it was, um, uh, Loretta Lynn, this week was Dolly Parton, 223 00:10:56,490 --> 00:10:59,117 and next week is, if I remember correctly, Shania Twain. 224 00:10:59,201 --> 00:11:00,369 [chuckles] Just brilliant. 225 00:11:00,452 --> 00:11:01,537 And it's nothing personal. 226 00:11:01,620 --> 00:11:03,914 It's just that he's been so busy with this new coaching gig. 227 00:11:04,623 --> 00:11:06,291 Oi! You listen to me! 228 00:11:06,875 --> 00:11:10,337 You play like that next week, you can kiss the trophy goodbye, 229 00:11:10,420 --> 00:11:14,550 'cause today, you all played like a bunch of little pricks! 230 00:11:14,633 --> 00:11:15,634 You hear me? 231 00:11:15,717 --> 00:11:17,344 [all] Yes, Coach! 232 00:11:17,427 --> 00:11:20,389 Except for Kokoruda. Way to put your body on the line out there. 233 00:11:20,472 --> 00:11:22,391 You know it, Coach. 234 00:11:22,474 --> 00:11:25,310 All right, Monika's mum brought orange slices. 235 00:11:25,394 --> 00:11:27,396 Don't eat the peels, you animals. Off you go. 236 00:11:28,021 --> 00:11:30,065 -Keeley! -Hey, Phoebs! 237 00:11:31,525 --> 00:11:33,944 Coach Kent. They're eight years old. 238 00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:36,655 -You can't call them little pricks. -Sorry, Ms. Bowen. 239 00:11:36,738 --> 00:11:38,365 Even when they're being little pricks. 240 00:11:38,448 --> 00:11:40,242 See you on Monday at school, girls. 241 00:11:40,325 --> 00:11:41,952 -Bye, Ms. Bowen. -Hey, babe. 242 00:11:42,035 --> 00:11:43,453 -[girl] Bye, Ms. Bowen. -[kisses] 243 00:11:44,246 --> 00:11:46,331 -All right, who wants some hot chocolate? -[gasps] Me! 244 00:11:46,415 --> 00:11:48,208 -I do. -Yeah, let's go! [chuckles] 245 00:11:51,962 --> 00:11:53,005 Oh. 246 00:11:53,088 --> 00:11:54,673 Oh! Before I forget, 247 00:11:54,756 --> 00:11:57,176 Rebecca wanted to see if we could do some double date action next week. 248 00:11:57,259 --> 00:11:58,635 Fucking hell. 249 00:11:58,719 --> 00:12:01,972 Bad word, Uncle Roy. You owe me one quid. 250 00:12:02,055 --> 00:12:03,223 Put it on my tab. 251 00:12:03,807 --> 00:12:05,350 -Can you hold this, please? -Course. 252 00:12:05,893 --> 00:12:07,102 Come on. It'll be fun. 253 00:12:08,687 --> 00:12:10,564 -Fine. -Thank you. 254 00:12:10,647 --> 00:12:12,608 -Mmm. -[chuckles] 255 00:12:12,691 --> 00:12:14,193 Phoebe, how was the match today? 256 00:12:14,735 --> 00:12:16,320 -Outstanding. -Yeah? 257 00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:18,906 I got a red card for elbowing a girl in her neck. 258 00:12:19,615 --> 00:12:20,908 And I'm very proud. 259 00:12:22,159 --> 00:12:23,493 -What? -[chuckles] 260 00:12:25,078 --> 00:12:28,040 Well, I know that you guys are just gonna smash it next week. 261 00:12:28,123 --> 00:12:29,499 Me too. 262 00:12:30,459 --> 00:12:31,877 So once the season's over, 263 00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:33,545 you're gonna have more time to see some friends, right? 264 00:12:34,129 --> 00:12:35,339 I see friends all the time. 265 00:12:35,422 --> 00:12:36,715 I know. You got your yoga mums. 266 00:12:38,300 --> 00:12:40,844 Don't you ever want anything more than sitting in child's pose, 267 00:12:40,928 --> 00:12:43,305 getting buzzed on rosé, and gossiping about reality TV 268 00:12:43,388 --> 00:12:45,432 with a bunch of women that know nothing about you? 269 00:12:45,516 --> 00:12:47,893 -No, I love it. -Mmm. 270 00:12:50,812 --> 00:12:52,314 Sky Sports reached out again. 271 00:12:52,397 --> 00:12:53,565 No. 272 00:12:53,649 --> 00:12:54,650 I think it's a good idea. 273 00:12:54,733 --> 00:12:58,487 Last time I did one of your good ideas, I made a fucking fool of myself. 274 00:12:58,570 --> 00:13:02,783 Your retirement press conference was beautiful, Roy. People loved it. 275 00:13:02,866 --> 00:13:04,493 It got, like, 15 million views. 276 00:13:04,576 --> 00:13:07,871 Wait, so your way of alleviating my embarrassment is to tell me 277 00:13:07,955 --> 00:13:10,457 how many millions of people have seen me look like a knob? 278 00:13:10,541 --> 00:13:12,876 [chuckles] Good point. 279 00:13:13,669 --> 00:13:16,463 I just wanna go on record saying that I think you'd be an amazing pundit. 280 00:13:16,547 --> 00:13:18,715 I don't wanna be a fucking football pundit, 281 00:13:18,799 --> 00:13:20,717 sat on fucking telly in a dumb fucking suit 282 00:13:20,801 --> 00:13:22,010 like a know-it-all twat. 283 00:13:22,094 --> 00:13:23,846 It's a shit job for shit people. 284 00:13:23,929 --> 00:13:27,307 I'd rather shit out my own fucking mouth than do that fucking shit. 285 00:13:28,433 --> 00:13:29,434 Got it. 286 00:13:30,185 --> 00:13:31,478 Oi, Phoebs, where we at now? 287 00:13:32,062 --> 00:13:35,941 £1,236. 288 00:13:37,067 --> 00:13:38,068 Impressive. 289 00:13:39,945 --> 00:13:42,030 [Arlo] And it's déjà vu all over again 290 00:13:42,114 --> 00:13:46,118 as Dani Rojas has another injury-time penalty kick 291 00:13:46,201 --> 00:13:49,663 to put Richmond in the win column for the first time this season. 292 00:13:51,123 --> 00:13:53,959 If he can get it past this adorable goalkeeper. 293 00:13:54,042 --> 00:13:55,085 [dog panting] 294 00:13:57,546 --> 00:14:02,134 Oh, gamesmanship from the keeper. How will Rojas respond? 295 00:14:04,595 --> 00:14:06,013 [dog grunting] 296 00:14:07,222 --> 00:14:08,223 Hmm? 297 00:14:08,807 --> 00:14:10,267 -[dog squeals] -[gasps] 298 00:14:10,350 --> 00:14:12,060 [panting] 299 00:14:12,144 --> 00:14:15,063 Football is death! 300 00:14:19,860 --> 00:14:21,445 -[knocks] -Oh, come in. 301 00:14:21,528 --> 00:14:22,613 Morning, boss. 302 00:14:22,696 --> 00:14:23,864 Oh, hi, Ted. 303 00:14:24,698 --> 00:14:27,451 Yikes. I haven't seen someone that disappointed to see me 304 00:14:27,534 --> 00:14:30,245 since I wore a red baseball cap to a Planned Parenthood fundraiser. 305 00:14:31,121 --> 00:14:34,917 Sorry, Ted. You're right. I-- I was just hoping you were Keeley. 306 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:37,461 That's okay. I wish I was Keeley three, four times a day. 307 00:14:37,544 --> 00:14:38,754 -Here you go. -Thank you. 308 00:14:38,837 --> 00:14:41,173 Let me guess. You got a fever for the flavor of a little girl talk? 309 00:14:42,382 --> 00:14:44,426 Well, shoot, why don't you let me take a crack at it? 310 00:14:44,510 --> 00:14:45,844 -Really? -Yeah, why not? 311 00:14:45,928 --> 00:14:47,804 Oh. Okay, what the hell. 312 00:14:47,888 --> 00:14:50,349 Uh, so this, um, chap I've been seeing, John. 313 00:14:50,432 --> 00:14:51,642 Stamos? 314 00:14:52,142 --> 00:14:54,102 No, his name's John Wingsnight. 315 00:14:54,186 --> 00:14:55,187 -Okay. -But that's not the point. 316 00:14:55,270 --> 00:14:57,564 Mm-hmm. Now hold on a second. His name's John Wingsnight? 317 00:14:57,648 --> 00:14:58,982 -Yes. -Like at a sports bar? 318 00:14:59,066 --> 00:15:01,235 Like, "Monday night's wings night down at PJ Flatts," like that? 319 00:15:01,318 --> 00:15:03,111 Ted, would you please stop? 320 00:15:03,195 --> 00:15:05,489 Rule number one: Even though it's called "girl talk," 321 00:15:05,572 --> 00:15:07,533 sometimes it needs to be more like, "Girl, listen." 322 00:15:07,616 --> 00:15:10,118 Got it. Learning on the fly here. Come on. Hit me. 323 00:15:10,202 --> 00:15:14,790 All right, thank you. So, John, um, I mean-- I mean, he's a wonderful man. 324 00:15:15,666 --> 00:15:18,418 -He's very handsome, um, successful. -Ooh. Nice. 325 00:15:18,502 --> 00:15:20,337 -Not shy. -Mmm, is he nice to you? 326 00:15:20,420 --> 00:15:23,674 Uh, yes. Yes, very. 327 00:15:23,757 --> 00:15:25,843 -Good. Yeah, he sounds great. -Mmm. 328 00:15:25,926 --> 00:15:27,719 So I'm confused. Is there a problem here? 329 00:15:27,803 --> 00:15:28,804 Well… 330 00:15:31,056 --> 00:15:32,266 Actually, I suppose not. 331 00:15:33,225 --> 00:15:34,226 Okay. 332 00:15:34,935 --> 00:15:36,770 Okay, so rule number two is 333 00:15:36,854 --> 00:15:39,857 sometimes girl talk can just be blabbing away about stuff, 334 00:15:39,940 --> 00:15:42,734 and nothing has to really change, and no one has to solve anything? 335 00:15:42,818 --> 00:15:43,944 Yeah, that's exactly right. 336 00:15:44,027 --> 00:15:45,362 I love it. Let's keep going. 337 00:15:45,445 --> 00:15:47,447 Right, so… [clears throat] Come. 338 00:15:47,531 --> 00:15:48,657 Ooh. 339 00:15:48,740 --> 00:15:50,075 -Okay. -Mmm. 340 00:15:51,493 --> 00:15:52,870 Hey, sorry I'm late, fellas. 341 00:15:52,953 --> 00:15:55,455 I was helping the boss pick out a nail polish color for her date tonight. 342 00:15:55,539 --> 00:15:57,666 My favorite's the blue, but I think they all kinda rock. 343 00:15:57,749 --> 00:15:59,084 What do guys you think? 344 00:16:00,002 --> 00:16:02,254 -What's wrong? -We got a situation, Coach. 345 00:16:02,337 --> 00:16:04,423 He's underselling. We have a Shakespearean fucking tragedy. 346 00:16:04,506 --> 00:16:05,716 [players] Take it easy, Dani. 347 00:16:05,799 --> 00:16:07,801 Come on, Dani. One more time, yeah? Have another go. 348 00:16:07,885 --> 00:16:08,886 [players cheering] 349 00:16:09,720 --> 00:16:11,346 [Isaac] Come on, Dani. Come on. 350 00:16:12,389 --> 00:16:13,807 [breathing heavily] 351 00:16:16,977 --> 00:16:18,562 -[Dani grunts] -[players] Oh! 352 00:16:19,354 --> 00:16:21,940 -[car alarm] -[speaking Spanish] 353 00:16:22,024 --> 00:16:23,483 -[car alarm chirps] -How many has he missed? 354 00:16:23,567 --> 00:16:24,568 All of them. 355 00:16:25,319 --> 00:16:27,362 Oh, boy. Okay. Hey, Dani! 356 00:16:28,405 --> 00:16:30,032 Come on, son. Let's take a walk. 357 00:16:31,366 --> 00:16:33,660 Wow. We're watching the end of someone's career. 358 00:16:33,744 --> 00:16:34,745 Not now, Jan. 359 00:16:35,287 --> 00:16:36,914 [panting] Uh, s-sorry, Coach. 360 00:16:36,997 --> 00:16:38,999 No, no need to apologize. 361 00:16:39,082 --> 00:16:44,129 Dani, what happened between you and Earl, that wasn't your fault, you know. 362 00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:47,633 You suffered an unlikely and tragic coincidence. 363 00:16:48,175 --> 00:16:49,676 Not too dissimilar from those seen 364 00:16:49,760 --> 00:16:52,596 throughout Paul Thomas Anderson's 1999 opus, Magnolia. 365 00:16:53,430 --> 00:16:55,766 Is that Tom Cruise with a little, tiny ponytail? 366 00:16:55,849 --> 00:16:58,352 No, Dani. I think you're thinking about The Last Samurai. 367 00:16:58,435 --> 00:17:00,562 He's got a little, tiny ponytail in Magnolia too, Coach. 368 00:17:00,646 --> 00:17:01,772 Oh, thank you, Coach. 369 00:17:01,855 --> 00:17:03,357 My apologies, Dani. 370 00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:06,068 Tom Cruise was rocking a little, tiny ponytail in both those films. 371 00:17:06,151 --> 00:17:07,528 -Okay. -Point is, 372 00:17:07,611 --> 00:17:09,613 it's a tragic occurrence, all right? 373 00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:11,949 A one-time thing. 374 00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:14,742 So let's get away from the bad mojo coming off that penalty box and, 375 00:17:14,826 --> 00:17:16,078 you know, have some fun. 376 00:17:16,161 --> 00:17:17,788 Let's kick some corners, right? 377 00:17:17,871 --> 00:17:18,872 -Right. [sniffs] -Yeah? 378 00:17:18,955 --> 00:17:21,375 Hey, fellas! Line up for Midnight Poutine! 379 00:17:21,458 --> 00:17:23,377 -[players cheer] -Yeah, there we go. 380 00:17:23,460 --> 00:17:24,711 Help you get your feel back. 381 00:17:26,003 --> 00:17:27,130 [straining] 382 00:17:28,590 --> 00:17:30,425 -All right, Dani. -Okay, Coach. 383 00:17:30,509 --> 00:17:32,177 Take a deep breath, yeah? 384 00:17:32,803 --> 00:17:34,513 I want you to picture the shot. 385 00:17:35,973 --> 00:17:38,392 Be the ball, Dani. Now kick it. 386 00:17:40,769 --> 00:17:43,772 -Ooh! Ooh, ooh, ooh. -[players chuckle] 387 00:17:43,856 --> 00:17:45,023 Ooh! [laughs] 388 00:17:45,107 --> 00:17:46,149 Oh, boy. 389 00:17:46,233 --> 00:17:48,026 -That's all right. That's all right. -[sighs] 390 00:17:49,319 --> 00:17:53,240 Well, fellas, I am more stumped than Paul Bunyan's local forest, you know th-- 391 00:17:53,323 --> 00:17:57,327 Ow! Ooh, that hurt. Ay, ay, ay. [sucks teeth] Any ideas? 392 00:17:57,411 --> 00:18:00,622 If Dani needs motivation, we could always just show him his goddamn paycheck. 393 00:18:02,416 --> 00:18:05,043 I mean, that's a tad aggressive, you know. 394 00:18:05,127 --> 00:18:07,462 But hey, I shouldn't bring an umbrella to a brainstorm, 395 00:18:07,546 --> 00:18:08,964 so I appreciate you getting the ball rolling, Nate. 396 00:18:09,047 --> 00:18:10,340 Yeah. 397 00:18:10,424 --> 00:18:12,843 Seems like the first thing we need to do is define the issue, yeah? 398 00:18:12,926 --> 00:18:14,011 True that. 399 00:18:14,094 --> 00:18:15,971 I think we already know what it is, don't we, Coach? 400 00:18:16,054 --> 00:18:17,431 What you talking about, Willis? 401 00:18:18,557 --> 00:18:20,267 Hey, you're not supposed to say that out loud. 402 00:18:20,350 --> 00:18:21,727 Which is why I wrote it down. 403 00:18:21,810 --> 00:18:23,896 -"The yips"? -Shh! 404 00:18:24,897 --> 00:18:26,273 -What are the yips? -Shh! 405 00:18:26,356 --> 00:18:27,941 Are you kidding me, you two? 406 00:18:29,735 --> 00:18:31,820 We don't say the Y-word out loud, you understand? 407 00:18:31,904 --> 00:18:33,697 It's like saying Macbeth in a theater, 408 00:18:33,780 --> 00:18:35,532 or Voldemort at Hogwarts, or, uh… 409 00:18:35,616 --> 00:18:37,201 -Soccer in England. -Bingo. 410 00:18:38,076 --> 00:18:39,870 But what are [mouthing] the yips? 411 00:18:39,953 --> 00:18:41,413 It's when, just out of nowhere, 412 00:18:41,496 --> 00:18:44,583 an athlete suddenly can't do the basic fundamentals of their sport. 413 00:18:44,666 --> 00:18:46,460 Yeah, you know, like Chuck Knoblauch's throw to first, 414 00:18:46,543 --> 00:18:48,962 or, uh, Charles Barkley's golf swing. 415 00:18:50,380 --> 00:18:51,632 You guys know what I mean. 416 00:18:53,634 --> 00:18:56,053 Yeesh, sometimes being here is like living in a foreign country. 417 00:18:56,136 --> 00:18:57,679 -You ever feel that way? -Yeah. 418 00:18:57,763 --> 00:18:59,389 Ted, what are your thoughts on therapy? 419 00:19:00,516 --> 00:19:05,103 Uh, general apprehension and a modest Midwestern skepticism. Why do you ask? 420 00:19:05,187 --> 00:19:07,606 Well, maybe we should bring in a sports psychologist. 421 00:19:07,689 --> 00:19:10,901 I know a lot of other clubs have had tremendous success with that. 422 00:19:10,984 --> 00:19:11,985 Hmm. 423 00:19:12,611 --> 00:19:13,779 It's not a bad idea, Coach. 424 00:19:14,780 --> 00:19:15,781 Mm-hmm. 425 00:19:17,032 --> 00:19:20,244 -Mmm. -Mm-hmm. Okay. [inhales deeply] 426 00:19:21,870 --> 00:19:23,080 Yeah, um, hold on. 427 00:19:23,163 --> 00:19:26,792 Let me think here. Let me get my thinking thing on, okay. 428 00:19:28,252 --> 00:19:29,294 Yeah, let's do it. 429 00:19:30,546 --> 00:19:32,714 [ambient jazz music playing] 430 00:19:32,798 --> 00:19:36,134 And now, we're nose-to-nose with one another, and half of me is thinking, 431 00:19:36,218 --> 00:19:37,886 -"Just kick this jerk in the balls… -[chuckles] 432 00:19:37,970 --> 00:19:39,471 …and when he bends over, give him a knee to the nose 433 00:19:39,555 --> 00:19:41,682 and be done with it, 'cause screw this guy." 434 00:19:41,765 --> 00:19:44,393 And the other half of me is thinking, "But it's Martin Short. 435 00:19:44,476 --> 00:19:46,144 -You love Martin Short." -Mmm. 436 00:19:46,770 --> 00:19:48,981 Well, the next thing you know, this tiny American woman says, 437 00:19:49,064 --> 00:19:50,482 "Is that it?" [laughs] 438 00:19:50,566 --> 00:19:53,443 And sure enough, there it was, wedged between the couch cushions, 439 00:19:53,527 --> 00:19:55,696 -Martin Short's wallet. [laughs] -Martin Short's wallet. 440 00:19:55,779 --> 00:19:57,614 I mean, he didn't steal it. 441 00:19:57,698 --> 00:19:59,908 -[laughing] No! -Wow, that's insane. [chuckles] 442 00:19:59,992 --> 00:20:02,536 That's madness. Could I get another one, please? 443 00:20:02,619 --> 00:20:05,664 God, I never knew that meet and greets at Broadway shows could be 444 00:20:05,747 --> 00:20:07,708 such hotbeds for, like, almost violence. 445 00:20:07,791 --> 00:20:10,919 Oh, big-time. But who cares about Martin Short when you're sitting next to 446 00:20:11,003 --> 00:20:14,047 "He's here, he's there, he's every-fucking-where, Roy Kent," 447 00:20:14,131 --> 00:20:16,258 -Roy Kent! -John's football-mad. 448 00:20:16,341 --> 00:20:18,927 Oh, terrific. Who do you support? 449 00:20:19,011 --> 00:20:21,388 Well, I bounce back and forward between United and City. 450 00:20:21,471 --> 00:20:23,223 Whichever club's winning, typically. 451 00:20:23,307 --> 00:20:25,309 -I love it. -Sounds like it. 452 00:20:25,392 --> 00:20:26,852 So, how's retirement, Roy? 453 00:20:26,935 --> 00:20:29,688 I mean, I can't imagine how different your life must be now. 454 00:20:29,771 --> 00:20:31,231 You must miss it all like mad, yeah? 455 00:20:32,149 --> 00:20:34,026 -I don't. -Hmm. 456 00:20:34,109 --> 00:20:35,444 So what are you doing now then? 457 00:20:35,527 --> 00:20:37,946 -Oh, you know, busy, busy. -Ah. 458 00:20:38,030 --> 00:20:39,531 I'm actually doing a bit of coaching at the moment. 459 00:20:39,615 --> 00:20:42,993 -I hadn't heard that. Fantastic. -Yeah. We got a cup final next week. 460 00:20:43,076 --> 00:20:44,620 In October… W-What cup's that? 461 00:20:45,204 --> 00:20:46,914 West London under-nine girls. 462 00:20:48,332 --> 00:20:49,625 Can I get another one, please? 463 00:20:50,125 --> 00:20:52,586 He's actually had an offer from Sky Sports to be a pundit. 464 00:20:52,669 --> 00:20:55,672 Oh, of course you have. You'd be amazing at that job. 465 00:20:55,756 --> 00:20:57,049 I love that idea. 466 00:20:57,716 --> 00:21:00,344 I couldn't agree more. 467 00:21:01,053 --> 00:21:03,472 Can I just say that your retirement speech was amazing. 468 00:21:03,555 --> 00:21:05,182 It's the first time my father's forwarded me 469 00:21:05,265 --> 00:21:08,769 an e-mail in the last five years that wasn't about the scourge of immigration. 470 00:21:08,852 --> 00:21:10,854 And that really meant a lot to me, so thank you. 471 00:21:11,855 --> 00:21:13,065 Cheers. 472 00:21:13,148 --> 00:21:15,817 It must've been super weird afterwards though, right? 473 00:21:15,901 --> 00:21:17,361 I'm gonna need two more of these, please. 474 00:21:22,533 --> 00:21:23,742 [Mae] Here you go, gentlemen. 475 00:21:23,825 --> 00:21:24,826 -Thank you, Mae. -Thanks, Mae. 476 00:21:24,910 --> 00:21:26,828 -Shame what happened to Earl. -Mm-hmm. 477 00:21:26,912 --> 00:21:29,665 Him and his owner, Nigel, used to come in here all the time, 478 00:21:29,748 --> 00:21:32,167 till he started shitting and pissing all over the place. 479 00:21:32,251 --> 00:21:34,086 Yeah. Nah, that's pretty common with older dogs. 480 00:21:34,169 --> 00:21:36,421 -No, I'm talking about Nigel. -Hmm. 481 00:21:37,923 --> 00:21:39,341 -To Earl. -He was a good boy. 482 00:21:42,010 --> 00:21:43,011 Mmm. 483 00:21:44,888 --> 00:21:48,141 Hey, Coach, can I get real a second? Forget my meal a second? 484 00:21:48,225 --> 00:21:50,394 Put down your beer and tell your buddy how you feel a second? 485 00:21:50,477 --> 00:21:52,896 -Yeah. -Sure. 486 00:21:53,939 --> 00:21:58,277 Look, I'm all for whatever it takes to help Dani get back to being a hundred. 487 00:21:58,861 --> 00:22:01,822 But, um, this whole idea of bringing in someone from the outside 488 00:22:01,905 --> 00:22:03,448 to help us get him there, 489 00:22:03,532 --> 00:22:05,158 I don't know, it just kinda puts a little knot in my belly. 490 00:22:05,242 --> 00:22:06,243 I'm not sure why. 491 00:22:06,326 --> 00:22:09,830 Hmm. Sounds like it might be your favorite Gin Blossoms song. 492 00:22:09,913 --> 00:22:12,040 -"Follow You Down"? -No, "Hey Jealousy." 493 00:22:12,124 --> 00:22:13,959 No, "Hey Jealousy" is their best song. 494 00:22:14,042 --> 00:22:16,128 My favorite song of theirs is "Follow You Down." 495 00:22:16,211 --> 00:22:18,046 -You don't know that story? -Uh… 496 00:22:18,130 --> 00:22:19,423 Doesn't matter, but to your point, 497 00:22:19,506 --> 00:22:21,758 you know, I thought it might've been that green-eyed monster too, 498 00:22:21,842 --> 00:22:24,011 but, uh, you know, I think there's a part of me 499 00:22:24,094 --> 00:22:29,057 that just doesn't, uh-- I don't know, uh, trust therapists? 500 00:22:29,725 --> 00:22:30,726 And how come? 501 00:22:31,435 --> 00:22:34,062 Well, when Michelle and I did couple's therapy, 502 00:22:34,146 --> 00:22:37,441 it was with this therapist she'd been going to for a while, and, um… 503 00:22:38,650 --> 00:22:40,903 I just kinda felt like I was being set up, you know. 504 00:22:41,737 --> 00:22:43,822 Like I was going in there not to be listened to, 505 00:22:43,906 --> 00:22:47,326 but rather just to hear about all the things I'd been doing wrong. 506 00:22:48,493 --> 00:22:50,579 And that's the only time you've ever seen a therapist? 507 00:22:50,662 --> 00:22:52,206 Oh, yeah. [chuckles] 508 00:22:52,956 --> 00:22:55,209 Do you remember what you said when I got dumped by that cruise ship dancer 509 00:22:55,292 --> 00:22:57,127 and swore I would never date another dancer again? 510 00:22:57,211 --> 00:22:58,545 "Can I have your tap shoes?" 511 00:22:59,129 --> 00:23:01,173 "All people are different people." 512 00:23:01,798 --> 00:23:03,550 Hmm. I said that? 513 00:23:03,634 --> 00:23:04,801 Mm-hmm. 514 00:23:05,511 --> 00:23:07,513 Oh. That's pretty good. 515 00:23:07,596 --> 00:23:08,597 Yeah. 516 00:23:09,264 --> 00:23:11,308 -You went out with another dancer though? -Many. 517 00:23:13,352 --> 00:23:14,353 Too many. 518 00:23:16,522 --> 00:23:18,524 Sorry if I was prattling on too much this evening. 519 00:23:18,607 --> 00:23:21,109 [sighs] You were as charming as ever. 520 00:23:21,944 --> 00:23:23,779 You sure you don't wanna come back to mine? 521 00:23:24,363 --> 00:23:25,572 Got an early morning, remember? 522 00:23:27,199 --> 00:23:30,244 Right. Yeah, um, well, let me know if I passed the test. 523 00:23:31,286 --> 00:23:33,539 -Lunch later this week? -Perfect. 524 00:23:37,042 --> 00:23:38,544 -Night. -Ooh. [chuckles] 525 00:23:38,627 --> 00:23:39,878 -Thank you. -[giggles] 526 00:23:39,962 --> 00:23:41,338 -See ya. -Bye. [chuckles] 527 00:23:41,421 --> 00:23:42,631 Cheers. 528 00:23:48,345 --> 00:23:50,639 -Well? -I think he's a really good match. 529 00:23:50,722 --> 00:23:54,101 I mean, he's age-appropriate, financially appropriate. 530 00:23:54,184 --> 00:23:55,227 He's not shy. 531 00:23:55,310 --> 00:23:57,896 -I love that about him. -Totally. 532 00:23:57,980 --> 00:23:59,481 Fucking hell. 533 00:24:02,067 --> 00:24:03,360 Is there a problem? 534 00:24:04,444 --> 00:24:05,946 Tell the truth. 535 00:24:06,029 --> 00:24:08,073 He's fine. That's it. 536 00:24:08,156 --> 00:24:10,158 Nothing wrong with that, most people are fine. 537 00:24:10,242 --> 00:24:13,412 But it's not about him. It's about why the fuck you think he deserves you. 538 00:24:14,538 --> 00:24:17,958 You deserve someone who makes you feel like you've been struck by lightning. 539 00:24:19,334 --> 00:24:21,044 Don't you dare settle for fine. 540 00:24:24,298 --> 00:24:25,299 Hmm. 541 00:24:26,258 --> 00:24:27,926 Not that it's any of my business. 542 00:24:45,903 --> 00:24:50,782 -435, 436, 437, 438, 439, 440-- -Ha! 543 00:24:50,866 --> 00:24:53,035 -Higgins, look alive! -Ooh! Ah. 544 00:24:53,118 --> 00:24:54,620 -Aw. [clicks tongue] Nuts. -Mm-mmm. 545 00:24:54,703 --> 00:24:58,081 Sorry. Um, I just wanted to introduce you to Dr. Sharon Fieldstone. 546 00:24:58,165 --> 00:25:00,042 She's gonna be looking after Dani. 547 00:25:00,125 --> 00:25:03,003 This is Nathan, Coach Beard, and Ted Lasso. 548 00:25:03,086 --> 00:25:04,505 -[grunts] -Oh, you don't need to stand. 549 00:25:04,588 --> 00:25:06,465 But it makes it a lot easier to do this. 550 00:25:06,548 --> 00:25:07,633 [beatboxes] 551 00:25:07,716 --> 00:25:09,468 -♪ It's nice to meet you ♪ -♪ Ooh ♪ 552 00:25:09,551 --> 00:25:11,220 -♪ It's nice to meet you ♪ -♪ Ooh ♪ 553 00:25:11,303 --> 00:25:14,181 ♪ Consider this song Our way to greet you ♪ 554 00:25:14,264 --> 00:25:15,265 ♪ Hey! ♪ 555 00:25:17,684 --> 00:25:20,395 So I understand that Dani has developed a case of the yips? 556 00:25:20,479 --> 00:25:21,939 -Hey! -[squeals] 557 00:25:22,648 --> 00:25:25,067 Okay, that's two weird things in a row. What's going on? 558 00:25:25,150 --> 00:25:27,569 Well, Doc, we don't like using that word around here. 559 00:25:27,653 --> 00:25:28,654 Why? 560 00:25:29,238 --> 00:25:30,781 Um, how do I… 561 00:25:31,990 --> 00:25:32,991 Why y'all looking at me? 562 00:25:33,075 --> 00:25:35,744 He's the one that knows everyth-- Oh, okay, all right. Um, well, Doc-- 563 00:25:35,827 --> 00:25:37,120 Doctor. 564 00:25:37,829 --> 00:25:39,206 Right, yes, of course. Sorry. 565 00:25:39,289 --> 00:25:42,709 Um, Doctor. Um, it's a superstition. 566 00:25:43,544 --> 00:25:45,087 I see. Well, the yips… 567 00:25:45,170 --> 00:25:46,880 -[squeals] -[groans] 568 00:25:47,673 --> 00:25:49,091 …are not a superstition. 569 00:25:49,675 --> 00:25:50,843 They are a mental condition, 570 00:25:50,926 --> 00:25:53,762 one that can be fixed with discipline, not denial. 571 00:25:53,846 --> 00:25:56,640 So, then, you're pretty confident that you can help us out with Dani, huh? 572 00:25:56,723 --> 00:25:58,058 Are you good at your job? 573 00:25:59,518 --> 00:26:00,394 Uh, I mean… 574 00:26:01,436 --> 00:26:02,521 Don't worry about them. 575 00:26:03,772 --> 00:26:06,441 Put all bullshit humility aside and be honest with me. 576 00:26:06,525 --> 00:26:08,360 Are you good at your job? Yes or no? 577 00:26:09,069 --> 00:26:10,654 Um, yes. 578 00:26:10,737 --> 00:26:11,947 I believe you. 579 00:26:12,865 --> 00:26:16,076 Well, as good as you are at your job, I'm twice as good at mine. 580 00:26:20,789 --> 00:26:22,541 -We're very lucky to have you. -Thank you very much. 581 00:26:22,624 --> 00:26:24,209 -That's good to know. -Thank you for coming here. 582 00:26:24,793 --> 00:26:27,004 Right, so where should I be conducting my sessions? 583 00:26:27,087 --> 00:26:28,547 -Um… -[Higgins stammers] 584 00:26:28,630 --> 00:26:31,425 Why don't I set you up in my office, all right? 585 00:26:32,009 --> 00:26:35,470 Great. Nice meeting all of you and sorry to have interrupted your game. 586 00:26:35,554 --> 00:26:36,555 What's your record? 587 00:26:36,638 --> 00:26:39,016 Oh, uh, 1,236. 588 00:26:42,519 --> 00:26:43,770 Impressive. 589 00:26:52,404 --> 00:26:54,573 She seems fun. 590 00:26:55,073 --> 00:26:56,074 Mm-hmm. 591 00:26:59,578 --> 00:27:01,413 You're sure you're okay, me using your office? 592 00:27:01,496 --> 00:27:02,706 Not just being polite? 593 00:27:02,789 --> 00:27:05,876 I-- It's probably a bit of both, but I insist. 594 00:27:05,959 --> 00:27:08,170 -[chuckles] Thank you, Mr. Higgins. -No problem. 595 00:27:13,217 --> 00:27:14,927 -[knocks] -Hey, Doc, uh, tor. 596 00:27:15,010 --> 00:27:16,595 Uh, this right here, this is Dani Rojas. 597 00:27:16,678 --> 00:27:19,223 Dani, this is Dr. Sharon Fieldstone. 598 00:27:19,306 --> 00:27:21,266 Nice to meet you, Dani. How you feeling? 599 00:27:21,350 --> 00:27:22,768 Like a murderer. 600 00:27:23,393 --> 00:27:24,770 Please. 601 00:27:26,021 --> 00:27:27,022 You're all right. 602 00:27:28,315 --> 00:27:31,693 Yeah. Want me to stick around, help you break the ice with Dani here? 603 00:27:31,777 --> 00:27:33,987 I think we'll be all right, Coach Lasso. Thank you. 604 00:27:34,905 --> 00:27:36,532 Okay. Yeah. 605 00:27:37,032 --> 00:27:39,952 [Dr. Fieldstone speaking Spanish] 606 00:27:40,619 --> 00:27:41,828 [Dani speaking Spanish] 607 00:27:45,374 --> 00:27:46,875 -You okay? -Oh, yeah. 608 00:27:47,417 --> 00:27:49,419 This is gonna be perfect. Yeah. 609 00:27:50,963 --> 00:27:51,964 Aw. 610 00:27:52,673 --> 00:27:55,050 And remember, this is when tickets to Stomp were tough to get. 611 00:27:55,133 --> 00:27:57,511 Anyway, this tall redhead pushes in front of me, 612 00:27:57,594 --> 00:27:59,429 so I tap him on the shoulder, he turns around and goes, 613 00:27:59,513 --> 00:28:01,598 "Is there a problem?" I go, "Yeah, there's a problem." 614 00:28:01,682 --> 00:28:03,851 He goes, "It's all right. It's all right. I know the choreographer." 615 00:28:03,934 --> 00:28:06,562 [fading] Guess who it was… [muffled speaking] 616 00:28:13,360 --> 00:28:15,362 [muffled speaking continues] 617 00:28:26,331 --> 00:28:27,499 [normal] Is everything okay, Rebecca? 618 00:28:30,085 --> 00:28:34,882 [stammers] It's j-- Dating is so odd, isn't it? 619 00:28:34,965 --> 00:28:37,843 -Yeah. -I mean, we are all strangers essentially. 620 00:28:37,926 --> 00:28:41,722 So I mean, how is it ever possible to truly feel safe with someone? 621 00:28:41,805 --> 00:28:42,806 I suppose you can't. 622 00:28:42,890 --> 00:28:45,267 You know, my friend, Flo, once told me 623 00:28:45,350 --> 00:28:49,730 that intimacy was all about leaving yourself open to being attacked. 624 00:28:50,522 --> 00:28:52,274 -Oh. -Isn't that horrible? 625 00:28:52,357 --> 00:28:53,692 I've not heard that one. 626 00:28:53,775 --> 00:28:56,737 But I mean, it does make you realize how scary it is, 627 00:28:57,946 --> 00:28:59,656 allowing yourself to be intimate again. 628 00:29:01,033 --> 00:29:02,743 I mean, you really do have to be brave. 629 00:29:07,080 --> 00:29:08,665 And that's it right there, isn't it? 630 00:29:10,626 --> 00:29:12,836 I need to be brave enough to let someone… 631 00:29:14,755 --> 00:29:16,924 wonderful love me, 632 00:29:17,007 --> 00:29:20,093 without fear of being hurt and without fear of being… 633 00:29:22,054 --> 00:29:23,055 safe. 634 00:29:26,433 --> 00:29:28,810 Sorry… Are you breaking up with me? 635 00:29:33,148 --> 00:29:36,735 I'm so sorry. I-- I actually didn't know I was 636 00:29:36,818 --> 00:29:39,029 -going to do that-- -No, no, it's-- it's all right. 637 00:29:40,697 --> 00:29:42,658 -[laughs nervously] -[sighs] 638 00:29:45,410 --> 00:29:46,495 Coffees are on me. 639 00:29:47,079 --> 00:29:49,790 Yeah, fair enough. Cheers. 640 00:29:51,375 --> 00:29:52,584 [John swallows] 641 00:29:57,798 --> 00:29:59,550 [Dani] Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na! 642 00:29:59,633 --> 00:30:03,011 Dani Rojas, Rojas. Dani Rojas. 643 00:30:03,095 --> 00:30:05,138 Hello, my beautiful coaches. May I join the drill? 644 00:30:05,222 --> 00:30:06,431 Sure thing, Dani, yeah. 645 00:30:06,515 --> 00:30:08,350 But hey, y-you take this at your own pace, okay? 646 00:30:08,433 --> 00:30:09,434 You got it, Coach. 647 00:30:12,229 --> 00:30:13,230 Hmm. 648 00:30:19,403 --> 00:30:20,445 [groans] 649 00:30:21,196 --> 00:30:22,322 Did she not wave back? 650 00:30:22,406 --> 00:30:24,658 -Oh, I don't think she saw me. -She saw you. 651 00:30:42,467 --> 00:30:44,052 [exhales] 652 00:30:58,775 --> 00:31:00,736 -[players cheering] -[chuckles] 653 00:31:00,819 --> 00:31:02,571 -Oh! -Ohh! 654 00:31:10,204 --> 00:31:11,413 Hey, all right! 655 00:31:18,420 --> 00:31:20,672 Hey, they got a whole bunch of new emojis on here. You see this? 656 00:31:20,756 --> 00:31:22,925 Do you remember when they added Groucho but no Harpo? 657 00:31:23,008 --> 00:31:24,426 -Mmm. -It's bullshit. 658 00:31:25,093 --> 00:31:29,306 Good night, coaches, and thank you for Dr. Sharon. She's incredible. 659 00:31:29,389 --> 00:31:31,558 No problem, Dani. Just glad you're feeling better. 660 00:31:32,226 --> 00:31:35,437 [stammers] Yeah, but ho-hold on a sec. Um, I'm just curious. 661 00:31:35,521 --> 00:31:38,232 What did she-- Um, I mean, what ended up helping you? 662 00:31:39,608 --> 00:31:40,984 Dr. Sharon helped me remember that 663 00:31:41,068 --> 00:31:44,446 even though football is life, football is also death. 664 00:31:45,989 --> 00:31:47,824 And that football is football too. 665 00:31:49,326 --> 00:31:50,869 But mostly that football is life! 666 00:31:50,953 --> 00:31:52,704 [chuckles] Yeah. 667 00:31:55,457 --> 00:31:57,084 Yeah, well, there you have it. 668 00:31:58,377 --> 00:32:01,255 You know what, I'm gonna go upstairs, thank the good doc before she splits. 669 00:32:01,922 --> 00:32:03,423 It's the least you can do. 670 00:32:04,049 --> 00:32:05,342 Hey, Higgins. Doc still here? 671 00:32:05,425 --> 00:32:07,219 Oh, wait, Ted. She's in a session. 672 00:32:07,302 --> 00:32:08,470 A session? With who? 673 00:32:10,055 --> 00:32:12,891 -Thank you, Sharon. For real. -Mm-hmm. You're welcome. 674 00:32:13,642 --> 00:32:14,643 She's amazing. 675 00:32:15,644 --> 00:32:18,397 -Thierry? -Oh, yes. Hi. 676 00:32:19,064 --> 00:32:21,942 [speaking French] 677 00:32:22,025 --> 00:32:24,361 [both speaking French] 678 00:32:24,444 --> 00:32:27,447 A few of the boys asked to sit down with Dr. Fieldstone before she left. 679 00:32:27,531 --> 00:32:28,615 I don't see the harm, right? 680 00:32:29,199 --> 00:32:31,118 No, that-- That's great. Yeah. 681 00:32:35,998 --> 00:32:38,959 -Hi. -[Roy] Hey, gorgeous. What's going on? 682 00:32:39,042 --> 00:32:40,294 I feel like a little shit. 683 00:32:40,794 --> 00:32:43,422 I used our fun night out together to try and change your mind 684 00:32:43,505 --> 00:32:45,382 about something you don't wanna do. 685 00:32:45,465 --> 00:32:47,634 That was tacky, and I'm really sorry for it. 686 00:32:47,718 --> 00:32:49,678 You're very sweet. Thank you. 687 00:32:49,761 --> 00:32:51,263 [chuckles] I'm leaving work right now. 688 00:32:51,346 --> 00:32:54,224 I can stop by Waitrose, pick up a bottle of wine, bring it over? 689 00:32:54,308 --> 00:32:57,269 Waitrose, is it? Who am I talking to, the fucking queen? 690 00:32:57,352 --> 00:32:59,438 -[Keeley chuckles] -I'd love to, but, um… 691 00:32:59,521 --> 00:33:01,315 Oh, fuck! Yeah, it's yoga mums night. Sorry. 692 00:33:01,398 --> 00:33:04,109 Yeah, but you can beg for forgiveness later. 693 00:33:04,193 --> 00:33:05,611 I can swing by and wake you up. 694 00:33:05,694 --> 00:33:08,488 Oi, Roy. Hurry up. It's about to start. 695 00:33:09,323 --> 00:33:11,408 I'll be awake. Have fun, yeah? 696 00:33:11,491 --> 00:33:12,492 Bye, babe. 697 00:33:12,576 --> 00:33:14,620 [music playing on TV] 698 00:33:14,703 --> 00:33:16,038 Let's fucking do this. 699 00:33:16,121 --> 00:33:18,457 [music continues] 700 00:33:18,540 --> 00:33:20,667 [female host on TV] Who will be eliminated this week 701 00:33:20,751 --> 00:33:24,463 on the UK's number one show, Lust Conquers All? 702 00:33:24,546 --> 00:33:27,966 Will it be Grimsby's top makeup counter associate, Ellie? 703 00:33:28,050 --> 00:33:31,470 Can't vote me off, yeah? I'm the one who makes your lips tick. 704 00:33:31,553 --> 00:33:33,388 -Oh, shut up, you slag. -[laughing] 705 00:33:33,472 --> 00:33:35,265 Come on. She's hilarious. 706 00:33:35,349 --> 00:33:38,185 Or will it be the footballing tart, Jamie? 707 00:33:40,437 --> 00:33:42,147 [people on TV clamoring] 708 00:33:42,231 --> 00:33:44,691 You can't get rid of me. I'm the island's top scorer. 709 00:33:45,859 --> 00:33:46,860 Sexually. 710 00:33:48,403 --> 00:33:50,989 -[scoffs] -God, I love him. 711 00:33:51,073 --> 00:33:52,991 -[yoga mums sigh] -Oh, same. 712 00:33:53,075 --> 00:33:55,410 -Jesus. -Top up my rosé please, Janice? 713 00:33:55,494 --> 00:33:57,162 [female host on TV] …pharmacist from Borehamwood? 714 00:33:57,246 --> 00:33:59,873 -Or Clara, Bournemouth's scandalous… -Cheers. 715 00:33:59,957 --> 00:34:00,958 Cheers.